


kissing under the mistletoe

by dare121



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Advent Calendar, F/F, there are some of the other characters too obviously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-01
Updated: 2016-12-23
Packaged: 2018-09-03 09:53:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 75,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8707792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dare121/pseuds/dare121
Summary: This is an Advent Calendar for my friend @darakanvers on tumblr. I will be posting a one-shot every day from the 1st to the 24th of December.Every chapter will have the prompt for the one shot and a short summary.Enjoy xoxo





	1. of myths and legends

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RaneJizzoli](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaneJizzoli/gifts).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt/word: "Sasquatch" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Kara and Winn are acting weird, and Alex is forced into joining a search party."

“What are you two doing?” Alex asked suspiciously as she walked in on Kara and Winn huddled around a laptop. They were both holding onto their bottles of juice and Kara had her cape wrapped around herself.

 

“Nothing,” Winn replied quickly, his hand shutting the laptop faster than Alex could blink.

 

“You’re not watching porn, are you?” Narrowing her eyes, Alex walked further into the small office Kara and Winn were sitting in and closed the door behind her so nobody else would see them. She really hoped it _wasn’t_ porn, though.

 

“Ew, no!” Kara denied, shuffling her chair further away from Winn, as though it was the thought of watching porn at the DEO with _Winn_ that was the unthinkable part. Granted, Alex wouldn’t have been too psyched, either, if her girlfriend had been watching pornography with anyone but her.

 

“Then what are you looking at?” Alex stopped behind Kara and placed her hands on her shoulders. “If it’s not porn, it can’t possibly be any worse.” She gave Winn an expectant look and he sighed.

 

“We were watching the latest Sasquatch video,” he mumbled, his hands folded in his lap, his shoulders drooping. “Kara thinks he might be an alien refugee who’s been living out in the Canadian wilderness for centuries.”

 

Blinking slowly, Alex furrowed her brows.

 

“You’re watching…” she trailed off. “Why? Since when do you care about Sasquatch? He’s not real.”

 

“He or she or they, we don’t know,” Winn corrected her with the voice of someone who had spent many years studying the subject. “But if Kara is right and Sasquatch is an alien refugee, then we’re going to find them.”

 

With a great big sigh, Alex rubbed her eyes.

 

“I need to leave this room, or I’m going to explode from the amount of nerd the two of you are giving off right now,” she said, leaning down and giving Kara a sweet kiss. “Sasquatch isn’t real, baby.”

 

Kara pouted. “That’s what humans used to say about aliens, and now look where we are,” she retorted, leaning up and sneaking another kiss while Winn rolled his eyes next to them and reopened his laptop. “You’re dating one.”

 

Alex grinned despite herself.

 

-

 

Two weeks later, Alex woke up on Sunday to the sound of Kara’s phone going off at seven in the morning.

 

Groaning, she rolled over and curled both arms around her girlfriend’s form, trying to keep her from ruining their sleep-in. Maybe if they let it go to voicemail, whoever had called would give up and leave them alone.

 

Sadly, Kara seemed to have other plans, as she reached out with her hand to grab the cell.

 

“Winn?” she asked, completely alert in less than an instant. Stupid Kryptonian genes and their stupid Kryptonian powers under Earth’s yellow sun. “You’re already downstairs? We said we’d meet at eight.”

 

With a sigh, Alex rolled back onto her side of the bed and rubbed her eyes.

 

So much for getting some rest.

 

“Yeah, sorry, come on up while I get ready,” Kara replied, sending Alex an apologetic look as she unfurled herself from the covers. “Yeah, just use your key.” She blushed. “ _Yes_ , Alex and I are both decent.”

 

Looking down at herself, Alex was relieved to see that Kara was right. Thankfully, she’d remembered to put her pajama pants and her tank top back on after sex with Kara the night before. She really didn’t want to relive that moment where Winn had seen her naked because she’d shuffled out of the bedroom without knowing that he was there.

 

The two of them hadn’t spoken for two weeks after that.

 

“I’ll see you in a second,” Kara finished, right before she ended the call.

 

Then, before Alex could get a word in edgewise, Kara had supersped into the bathroom. A few seconds later, she was back. She looked fresh, and Alex was pretty sure she’d abused her powers for a super shower again.

 

Rude.

 

“What’s going on?” Alex asked, getting up from the bed and slumping into Kara’s arms. “What are you and Winn getting up to now?” She tucked her nose against Kara’s neck and closed her eyes, enjoying the moment of closeness before they wouldn’t be alone anymore.

 

“Winn and I are planning our trip to Canada today,” Kara replied, softly running her hands along Alex’s back and kissing the side of her head. “I totally forgot to tell you yesterday that we decided to go looking for Sasquatch ourselves. With my super senses, we should have better luck.”

 

Alex’s relaxation evaporated in an instant.

 

“Why do you do this to me?” she whined, pulling away and falling back onto the bed. “You know there is no way I’m letting you go out there by yourself. And with Winn? Winn is going to get himself killed.”

 

She grunted when Kara belly-flopped onto her.

 

“You don’t have to come if you don’t want to,” she mumbled, pressing kisses along Alex’s neck. “But I bet it’d be really nice to share a tent. And totally romantic to sleep under the stars.”

 

Alex groaned again.

 

“I’m going to be crawling with ticks.” She was on the verge of complaining some more, when Kara covered her mouth with her own, swallowing the rest of her words. Under any other circumstances, Alex would have protested against this blatant disregard for her opinion, but goddamn… Kara just felt too good…

 

At least until they heard a decidedly manly shriek from the living room.

 

“You said you guys were decent!”

 

-

 

Trudging through the dirt, Alex pursed her lips at how excited both Kara and Winn looked at the idea of meeting this fake, made-up legend of theirs. The fact that she was even here in the first place was ridiculous.

 

The first time in ages that she actually took a vacation, and she was spending it in the Canadian wilderness, looking for a myth.

 

Great.

 

At least the prospect of sharing a tent with Kara actually _was_ pretty alluring.

 

And all of the really heavy stuff was in Kara’s backpack.

 

“I can’t believe you’re making me do this,” Alex grumbled, her and Kara’s hand swinging back and forth in between them. Of course, Alex’s nose was already cold, while Kara’s face was almost being split in two by her grin.

 

“I’m so glad you came along,” Kara shot back, nudging Alex’s shoulder with her own and pressing a kiss against her girlfriend’s cheek. “Thank you.”

 

Blushing slightly, Alex rolled her eyes.

 

“Yeah, yeah,” she mumbled, squeezing Kara’s hand to let her know that she was mostly kidding about her complaints. “Someone needs to make sure the two of you make it home alive. With your luck, you’d go looking for Sasquatch and end up with an actual alien who’s trying to kill your faces.”

 

While Winn shook his head at her words, Kara grinned and gave her another kiss on the cheek.

 

-

 

After a full day of nothing but walking and searching, Alex was more than glad to plant her ass down on a log and never move again. Thankfully, she was dating a Kryptonian who didn’t _do_ tired, and who was more than capable of setting up their tent while Alex whined.

 

“How long were we planning on staying here again?” Alex asked, pulling out the map she’d bought and trying to figure out where exactly they were. In this forest. With no landmarks. Damn. Hopefully, Kara’s eidetic mind would be able to lead them home in a few days.

 

“Five days,” Winn replied, trying and failing to set up his own tent, before Kara took pity and did it for him. “And we’re only getting started. Tomorrow, we’ll really start looking. I’ve designed a tracker to pick up in any alien life in the vicinity.”

 

While Kara started setting up their camp fire, Alex rubbed her face.

 

“Won’t that just point straight at Kara and ruin the results?” she asked, already feeling like her body was crawling with all kinds of critters. “Kara should just use her x-ray vision and super speed to search this entire forest in a couple of seconds.”

 

Winn scoffed.

 

“Where’s the fun in _that_?” He seemed genuinely affronted, and Alex wondered briefly where and when she’d signed up to have a little brother.

 

“Let’s just have some dinner.” Kara tried to diffuse the situation, pulling some of their food items from her backpack and handing them out to Alex and Winn. Then she sat down next to Alex and snuggled up to her.

 

And fine, _fine_ , maybe sitting here with Kara among these scenic trees was actually pretty nice.

 

Maybe.

 

-

 

Day two and three were just as uneventful as day one, and Alex spent every night picking the ticks and other insects from her body. Kara had tried to help during their first night, but then her hands had slid into decidedly intimate territory, and Alex had been forced to slap her away.

 

There would be no sex with Winn asleep in the next tent over.

 

At least that’s what Alex told Kara during their first night.

 

During their second night, she spent a good hour on her back with Kara’s hand over her mouth to keep her quiet while Kara did extremely pleasant things with her unoccupied fingers.

 

That was enough to get Alex through most of the second and third day.

 

On the fourth, they found footsteps.

 

Ape-like footsteps.

 

-

 

“This is basically proof,” Winn said as he looked down at the pictures and samples they’d taken from the footsteps. “I mean look at these. There aren’t any apes living here.” His eyes were shining, and Alex tried not to bring him down with her logical explanations.

 

She wanted to tell him that these had probably been made by a human who was trying to trick people much like him into believing things that weren’t true. But she wasn’t cruel, and the joy she saw in Kara’s features was intensely precious to Alex.

 

“Guess that means we’re going in the right direction,” she forced herself to say, smiling when Kara grabbed her around the waist and twirled her around.

 

“We’re so close,” Kara sing-songed, pressing kisses against Alex’s cheeks over and over again. “We just have to keep looking and we’re going to find Sasquatch. I know it.” Once she’d put Alex back onto the ground, she cupped her cheeks with both hands and pulled her into an enthusiastic kiss.

 

“Guys, I’m still here,” Winn complained as they continued to kiss, slowly getting lost in the feeling of each other’s lips. At least that’s how Alex felt when Kara pushed her against the nearest tree. “You guys are so gross. Can’t take you anywhere.”

 

-

 

Kara was very enthusiastic during night four.

 

Alex appreciated it very much.

 

Winn did not.

 

-

 

“My feet are killing me,” Alex sighed, sitting her ass down on a big river rock and setting down her bag. “Can we take a break for a second? I think I need to put my feet in some of this freezing water.”

 

Smiling gently, Kara pressed a kiss against Alex’s temple.

 

“Winn’s detector is picking up some sort of signal a little bit from here,” she said, curling her arms around Alex’s neck from behind. “We’re going to go and check it out. Are you okay to wait here until we get back?”

 

Alex turned her head to the side to kiss Kara’s cheek.

 

“Sure; you kids have fun. Try not to let Winn tumble off a cliff,” she murmured against Kara’s skin, closing her eyes for a second and focusing on Kara’s warmth and the comfort of having her so close. “I’ll be right here.”

 

“Love you,” Kara said, before noisily kissing Alex’s cheek and straightening up. “Let’s go, Winn! Sasquatch waits for no man or woman or gender-nonconforming person!”

 

They high-fived, and Alex grinned at their enthusiasm.

 

This was exactly why she’d decided to come.

 

-

 

About half an hour later, Alex had bitten a sizeable chunk out of the novel she was reading, when she spotted movement out of the corner of her eye on the other side of the river bank.

 

At first, she thought Kara and Winn had returned, but when she looked up, she found herself confronted with the sight of a large, ape-like creature that was strolling casually along the river. Its fur was dark brown, and it had a much less menacing face than Alex would have anticipated.

 

“Holy fucking shitballs,” Alex murmured to herself, her novel falling to the ground as she scrambled to get her phone out of her pocket. If she didn’t get a picture of this thing, Kara would never forgive her.

 

She’d just opened the camera app on her smartphone, when the creature looked at her.

 

With shaking fingers, Alex clicked on the button to capture a picture. She wasn’t scared - she fought aliens three times her size almost every week - but she was dangerously excited for Kara’s sake. Because holy shit. Holy _shit_.

 

Fucking Sasquatch.

 

Slowly lowering her phone after taking another couple of pictures, Alex wondered what else to do. The creature was just standing there, staring at her. She wanted to call for Kara, but she also didn’t want to scare Sasquatch off with her raised voice.

 

Hopefully Kara was in the area.

 

Of course she’d be the only fucking one to see it.

 

Of course.

 

Typical.

 

Gingerly, she raised her hand and waved.

 

Because what if Kara and Winn were correct and Sasquatch really was an ancient alien who had been living on Earth for centuries? Surely they would have picked up on how humans greeted each other by now.

 

A few seconds later, Sasquatch waved back.

 

Alex’s mouth dropped open.

 

Kara would be so pissed that she’d missed this.

 

A moment later, she heard the sound of footsteps behind her, and a stone fell from her chest. Because maybe this could be salvaged after all, and they wouldn’t just be left with Alex’s shitty smartphone pictures.

 

However, before Kara could make an appearance, Sasquatch made eye contact with Alex, _winked_ , and disappeared into the underbrush. The goddamn ape _winked_ at her before leaving her hanging.

 

“Hey, wait a second! Come back here!” she called after him, running both hands through her hair at her inability to do anything. Cursing softly to herself, she turned around just in time to see Kara and Winn bursting onto the scene, obviously worried about Alex’s shout.

 

Kara was by her side in a second.

 

“Are you okay? Did something happen?” she asked frantically, very clearly using her x-ray vision to ensure Alex wasn’t hurt in any way. When she was satisfied, she wrapped both arms around Alex’s body and held her tightly.

 

“I, um, I saw it,” Alex mumbled, voice barely audible with her face pressed against Kara’s shoulder. “I took pictures, too. It fucking waved at me. I didn’t call out to you, cause I didn’t want it to leave, but then it fucking left me anyway. Stupid ape.”

 

Body going very still, Kara slowly pulled back.

 

“You saw Sasquatch?” Her voice was deathly calm, and Alex nodded as she handed over the phone so Kara could check the pictures. Both Kara’s and Winn’s eyes grew huge as saucers as they took in the ape-like features.

 

Then they both started screaming.

 

-

 

In the end, they didn’t see the creature again, even after Kara started cheating a bit and used her x-ray vision. But to Alex’s great surprise, neither Kara nor Winn seemed particularly devastated that Alex had been the only to see Sasquatch in person.

 

After all, it meant they could come back and visit again, now with the knowledge that Sasquatch really was real.

 

But Alex wasn’t so sure about that.

 

On the flight home, with Kara dozing on her shoulder and Winn playing on his Nintendo 3DS, Alex had plenty of time to think about the encounter. It had been rather strange that the creature had only shown up after Kara and Winn had left her alone.

 

And the whole waving and winking thing had her suspicious, too.

 

In any and all of the footage of Sasquatch Kara had forced her to watch, the creature had never acted this friendly. And even though Alex was still absolutely sure that that footage was all bogus anyway, there was a niggling thought in her mind that something wasn’t quite right.

 

-

 

When she was back at the DEO a few days later - finally tick-free - she saw J’onn standing at the control center. He was tapping a pen against his lips as he looked at some footage on the screen.

 

When he saw her, he winked at her.

 

And her mouth dropped open.

 

Sneaky bastard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you had a good time. see you tomorrow. thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing this for me c:
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr
> 
> xoxo


	2. let's not do this again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt/word: "Watermelon" [Kara x Alex; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Alex is a sore loser and Kara has a really good time."

“Tell me again why I’m doing this?” 

 

Alex was pushing the shopping cart while Kara bounced around her excitedly.

 

“Because you said I couldn’t fit a whole bag of marshmallows into my mouth at once and I totally schooled you,” Kara replied, leaning over and pressing a kiss against Alex’s cheek. “And now you’re crying foul because you’re a sore loser.”

 

Grumbling, Alex stopped at the checkout counter and hefted the four heavy watermelons onto the conveyor belt. 

 

“Right, that’s a great reason,” she mumbled to herself.

 

“And now you’re regretting how much tequila you had last night,” Kara continued, making zero effort to conceal her glee. Teasing Alex was one of her favorite pastimes after all, especially when Alex was grumpy like this.

 

“You can stop narrating now,” Alex complained, handing over the appropriate amount of cash to the disinterested cashier. Kara was right, of course. Alex had indulged in way too much alcohol the night before, even though it had been sort of fun as well.

 

Beating a drunk Kara at pool was always a lot better than losing to a sober one.

 

“And now you’re thinking about what we did after we got drunk together,” Kara said innocently, putting the watermelons into the bags they’d brought with them. 

 

Alex blushed.

 

“That should have been more than enough to make up for the fact that I doubted you. This thing we’re doing now is entirely unnecessary,” she said, trying not to think about how enthusiastic Kara had been about trying out their new strap-on. 

 

To be fair, maybe they shouldn’t have done  _ that  _ while they were drunk, either. 

 

Maybe then their headboard would have survived.

 

“Alex Danvers doesn’t back out on promises,” Kara teased her, holding the heavy bags easily in her arms. “Alex Danvers gives her girlfriend what she wants, when her girlfriend won a bet fair and square.”

 

Grumbling more heavily, Alex slapped Kara’s ass.

 

“Alex Danvers is going to kick her girlfriend’s butt if said girlfriend doesn’t start moving soon,” she said, placing her hand on the small of Kara’s back and urging her towards the door of the supermarket while she pushed the now empty shopping cart with her free hand.

 

With a grin, Kara leaned down in between the two bags and puckered her lips.

 

Alex was powerless to resist.

 

-

 

“If you ever tell anybody about this, I will never speak to you again, you hear me? Never,” Alex threatened, her face fiercely determined. She would solve this little problem the same way she did everything else. With a strong work ethic and an extremely stiff upper lip.

 

If she could manage that around Kara, the world’s sunniest Kryptonian.

 

“I promise. This is just for me,” Kara replied, grinning brightly from ear to ear. 

 

With a scowl, Alex got up from the couch and pulled her black tank top over her head, leaving her in her black bra. 

 

Walking around the coffee table, Alex chucked the tank at Kara’s face, which earned her a whistle and an even bigger grin. Shaking her head, Alex reached around herself and unclipped her bra. 

 

“I feel like there should be some sort of terrible music playing right now,” she said as she slid off her bra and threw it over to Kara as well. “Not that I’m going to encourage you to ever dare me to do this again. Seriously, don’t.”

 

Kara’s faux-innocent expression didn’t make Alex feel any better about the situation.

 

“Stop stalling.” Kara wiggled her eyebrows, before she pulled her fluffy, white jacket even tighter around herself. “I want to see the goods.” 

 

Affronted, Alex placed her hands on her hips.

 

“I see how it is,” she said, waving at her naked upper body. “You’ve grown tired of seeing all of this.” She flexed her abs, perhaps a little too delighted when Kara’s eyes dropped down for the fraction of a second before she got back into their teasing game. 

 

“You got me,” Kara replied, throwing up both hands. 

 

Shaking her head, Alex undid her belt and placed it down on the coffee table. She didn’t particularly feel like hitting anything valuable with the buckle and inadvertently destroying anything just because Kara wanted to have some fun.

 

“You’re being very rude,” Alex continued, hooking her fingers into her jeans and sliding them down in one swift movement. Perfecting this move had taken years of practice, and Alex felt more than a little vindicated when Kara swallowed hard, obviously affected by the consequences of her own joke.

 

Standing around in nothing but her panties, Alex crossed her arms over her chest.

 

“You’re not done,” Kara protested, pulling a pillow onto her lap and clutching it tightly. “I want to see the whole show! That’s why I bought you all of those tequila shots!” 

 

Alex knew it was a joke, considering Kara had been just as drunk when she’d told Alex she would empty the whole bag of marshmallows into her mouth. Only a drunk Kara could ever come up with such a nonsensical idea. 

 

Sighing, Alex gave in.

 

-

 

“The DEO tower sure is nice,” Lucy said as she sat down on one of the swiveling chairs in the laboratory. “I wish the desert bunker actually had windows. Maybe the government should spring for one of those fake windows that plays whatever weather you want to see.”

 

Humming her assent absentmindedly, Alex continued to stare down at the cell she was trying to isolate.

 

“You know what, though, it’s not nearly as nice as what I saw on Kara’s phone a couple of days ago,” Lucy continued, moving the chair back and forth as Alex worked the machine with her hands.

 

“Really,” Alex said without looking up, narrowing her eyes as the cell continued to be difficult.

 

“Yeah, yeah, it was really something special.” Lucy’s voice was calm and collected, so Alex barely paid her any attention. 

 

“That’s great,” Alex replied, feeling a surge of triumph when she finally isolated that pesky little cell. Now she just needed to be very, very careful…

 

“Yeah,” Lucy said again, her voice growing closer as she rolled up next to Alex. “I mean, Vasquez and I are really adventurous in bed and everything, but we’ve never brought food into the mix. I never knew you were so creative. Hat’s off, Danvers. That was one  _ hell  _ of a watermelon bra you made there.”

 

Alex’s hand jerked, destroying the cell in one fell swoop.

 

“I especially liked how you oiled up your abs and everything,” Lucy teased casually, slapping her hand down on Alex’s stiff shoulder. “And that herculean pose you made.” Lucy made a noise of approval. “Kara is truly  _ lucky _ to have someone who is so willing to try new things.”

 

Putting down her instruments, Alex slowly straightened out her back.

 

“You have thirty seconds to get out of here,” she said quietly, closing her eyes. “And if you tell anyone about what you saw, I will let it slip to J’onn that you and Vasquez have been using his old office for your trysts on the job.”

 

A disgusted sound reached her ears.

 

“You wouldn’t,” Lucy replied, clearly unhappy that her teasing had somewhat backfired.

 

“Try me,” Alex whispered back.

 

When she opened her eyes again, Lucy was gone.

 

-

 

“Did you show Lucy that picture of me in the watermelon bra?” Alex asked the second Kara swept in through their bedroom window in her Supergirl outfit. “She came into the lab today and told me that she saw it.”

 

Kara almost tripped over her own feet when she heard Alex’s words.

 

“Oh god, she saw that? I’m so sorry!” she replied, sliding off her boots and letting them drop down to the floor with a dull thud. “I promise I didn’t mean to show it to her. I left her alone with my phone for a second so she could look at these cute cat pictures I took a few days ago.”

 

The cape came next. 

 

Then the skirt.

 

And then Kara was on top of Alex, pressing her down into the bed.

 

“I guess she must have scrolled a little further than I wanted her to,” Kara let her forehead drop down onto Alex’s sternum, a long groan leaving her throat. “I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad.” 

 

“I had to threaten her with telling J’onn about what she and Vasquez are getting up to in his old office. I was saving that for something special,” Alex whined, wrapping her arms around Kara’s back. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara repeated, pushing herself up on her elbows and leaving a trail of butterfly kisses on Alex’s neck. “If it’s any consolation, I think you looked really good in that watermelon bra and with your muscles all shiny.” She nibbled at the underside of Alex’s jaw. 

 

Alex snorted.

 

“I wish I could get back at Lucy somehow,” she grumbled, leaning back her head to give Kara better access to her throat. “Put a stupid melon bra on  _ her  _ and see how she likes it when Vasquez has a picture of that on  _ their  _ phone.”

 

For a second, there was silence.

 

Then Kara leaned up her head and gave Alex a mischievous smile.

 

“I smell a devious operation that might involve lots of tequila and marshmallows,” Kara whispered conspiratorially.

 

“I like the way you think,” Alex replied, rolling Kara onto her back. 

 

-

 

“Hey, Lucy, think I can fit all of these marshmallows into my mouth at once?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well. this is a thing that happened.
> 
> hope you enjoyed! thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing this for me :)
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	3. who are you [Part 1]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Jiggery-Pokery" [Kara x Alex; Mild angst, mostly fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Winn opens a portal to another dimension. Things get weird."

“T-That wasn’t supposed to happen,” Winn said as he fiddled with the remote control in his hands. “I swear that wasn’t supposed to happen.” He shook his head, inching closer to Alex, who had her gun trained on the intruder. “ _Save me_.”

 

Rolling her eyes, Alex took a step forward so he could hide behind her.

 

“Who are you?” she demanded, the mist from the portal obscuring her vision. If only Kara were here to back them all up. But her sister was still off in another universe, playing hero somewhere else.

 

That still didn’t sit right with Alex.

 

She should’ve gone with her.

 

“ _Alex_?”

 

The voice that spoke from the mist was strangely familiar, and Alex held on more tightly to her gun as the person inside the mist stepped forward and into the light of the DEO lab. If only Winn could have waited with the experiment for just a bit longer.

 

The woman who stepped from the mist almost made Alex drop her gun.

 

“ _What jiggery-pokery is this_?” Kara asked.

 

Kara.

 

In a long white robe.

 

Kara.

 

With her hair perfectly straightened.

 

Kara.

 

From Krypton.

 

-

 

Alex’s gun was in her holster before she realized what she was doing.

 

She knew she shouldn’t trust this woman just because she had the same face as her Kara, but there was just something about the way she _looked_ at Alex. Something that told Alex she could trust this version of Kara just as much as her own.

 

“ _Where are we_ ? _And why are you dressed in this manner, Zrh_ _y_ _min_?” This Kara spoke in the formal Kryptonian way, even though Alex didn’t recognize the final word. Alex’s Kryptonese was better than most, but there were still gaps in her knowledge.

 

Slowly lifting her hands, Alex took a step forward.

 

“What is she saying?” Winn hissed from behind her, yelping when Alex stepped on his foot to keep him quiet.

 

“ _Kara_ ,” Alex started, reaching out her hand and feeling relieved when Kara took a step towards her as well, “ _we’re on Earth. You’ve traveled to a different universe through a portal. Don’t worry, we’re here to help_.”

 

As soon as their hands made contact, the other Kara was in Alex’s arms.

 

“ _How did we travel through a portal_ ? _There are no portals at our home, Zrh_ _y_ _min_ ,” Kara whispered, her grip almost tight enough to break Alex’s ribs. “ _I was just going to go down to the market to pick up your favorite food items_.”

 

Alex’s chest ached for this version of Kara, and not just because she was being squeezed so tightly.

 

“ _One of our scientists tried to replicate an experiment from one of the other Earths. I don’t know how you got here_ ,” Alex whispered, wondering why Kara wasn’t freaking out more about the fact that she’d traveled to another dimension. “ _But we’re going to figure it out. Together_.”

 

She also desperately wanted to know how the two of them could even know each other if the Krypton in this Kara’s reality had never been destroyed.

 

“ _I’m glad we’re here together_ ,” Kara said, loosening her hold on Alex’s body and pulling back her head. When they were face to face, she pressed their foreheads against one another, before lifting her hands and splaying her fingers across Alex’s cheeks. “ _May we be forever one in Rao’s light_.”

 

Oh boy.

 

-

 

Alex was sweating.

 

It wasn’t attractive and it certainly wasn’t comfortable.

 

But it also wasn’t something she could just turn off, especially not considering how she was walking into J’onn’s office at ten on a Wednesday night to let him know that they’d opened a portal to a different dimension without his approval.

 

He would definitely not be pleased.

 

“J’onn, there’s something you need to see,” Alex said, hoping and praying that he wouldn’t rake her over the coals too hard for this. Technically, it had been Winn’s experiment, but somehow Alex doubted that that logic would get her anywhere.

 

J’onn sighed.

 

“What happened? Is Kara back from the other Earth? Did she bring back something that will forever change the history of our planet?” His face was tired, and Alex wished they hadn’t accidentally screwed up.

 

He had enough to deal with right now with M’gann and Cadmus without adding Alex and her problems to the mix.

 

She crossed her arms over her chest.

 

“Winn opened a portal to a different dimension,” she said quickly, trying to rip off the band-aid in one fell swoop. “Nothing’s on fire and nothing was damaged. There’s... a different Kara in our universe now.”

 

He stared at her.

 

“I left her with Winn. She speaks surprisingly good English, but I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Krypton’s been involved with Earth for a long time.” She was rambling. That was usually Kara’s problem, but Alex wasn’t sure what else to do.

 

J’onn still wasn’t talking.

 

“She thinks we’re mated,” Alex concluded. “I mean, not _we_ as in you and I.” She shook her head. “Kara has her own… _version_ of me, and they’re mated.” She ran a hand through her hair. “I didn’t have the heart to tell her that I’m not her Alex.”

 

She would think about all of the repercussions of that sentence later, when she was alone.

 

“Does she seem hostile in any way?” J’onn asked, gripping Alex by the upper arm and dragging her out of his office. “Because if you left her alone with Winn and she’s going to hurt anybody, you are in so much more trouble than you already are.”

 

“She’s not hostile, she’s just scared,” Alex argued, wondering if pulling away from J’onn would make his mood any worse. “She seems like just as much of a sweetheart as our Kara.”

 

Alex tried not to think about how gentle this Kara had been when she’d reaffirmed their vows. Years ago, Kara had told her about the gesture. She’d even demonstrated it - shyly.

 

Even now, Alex remembered that moment very well.

 

-

 

“There, see? They’re laughing,” Alex pointed out, smiling at the sight of this Kryptonian Kara enjoying Winn’s company. Kara’s hands were clasped together in front of her body - a common gesture of polite interest on Krypton.

 

When they entered the room, Kara’s eyes sought out Alex immediately, and the love was almost palpable in her every feature. The look made Alex’s heart beat faster.

 

Then, Kara’s gaze moved to J’onn.

 

“ _J’onn, always a pleasure to see you_ ,” she said, giving him a friendly bow. “ _I did not know you had traveled to this alternate Earth as well_ .” She gave Alex a glowing look. “ _Are you and Alex planning yet more adventures across the galaxy_?”

 

Releasing Alex’s arm, J’onn stepped forward and returned her bow.

 

“Kara Zor-El of Krypton, it is an honor,” he said, mimicking her friendly pose. “I wish I could say I was the J’onn J’onzz you remember from your home world, but I am not.” He bowed again. “However, we are still friends. In this world.”

 

“I am glad to hear that,” Kara replied, smiling at him for a second before a realization seemed to dawn on her. “But if you know me from this world, where am I? The other me.” She looked around herself, as though Alex’s Kara would burst forth from behind a corner any second.

 

Then, her eyes settled on Alex and a profound sadness seemed to sweep over her face.

 

“ _You are not mine_.”

 

-

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

Alex’s voice was quiet as she walked closer to the other Kara.

 

“I didn’t mean to deceive you.” She sat down next to Kara on the small bench they’d put up here months ago and folded her hands in her lap.

 

They were on the roof of the DEO.

 

“I should have realized it sooner,” Kara replied, her voice thick with sorrow. “You wear different clothing and your hair is shorter, but when you looked at me…” She shook her head. “I thought I saw the love we share in my world.”

 

She closed her eyes, and Alex bit down on her bottom lip.

 

“I love my Kara very much, but we’re not together.” At Kara’s confused look, Alex amended her statement. “We aren’t mated, not the way you and your Alex are. We’re foster sisters. My Kara came to live with me when I was fourteen.”

 

The other Kara nodded.

 

“Your J’onn told me that Krypton was destroyed here.” Her eyes grew thick with sorrow again. “My family… my world…” She looked up at the stars, as though hoping she might still catch a glimpse of Krypton’s shining light. “Krypton was on the brink of destruction in my world, too.”

 

“How did you stop the explosion?” Alex asked gently, reaching out and folding her hand over this Kara’s shaking fingers. They felt just like her own Kara’s hands.

 

“We revealed ourselves to your planet and asked for your help,” Kara explained, slipping one of her hands free and sliding it over Alex’s. “Earth was still rich in many of the natural resources our planet needed to sustain itself.”

 

Alex couldn’t even imagine how the other humanity would have reacted to something that would have most likely seemed like an alien invasion.

 

“And how did we meet? My Kara was stuck in the Phantom Zone for over twenty years. You don’t look much older than her.” Hearing about this alternate reality was fascinating, and she would have given almost anything to meet the other version of herself.

 

Who was this other Alex Danvers? Was she just as wound up? Just as stubborn?

 

Kara smiled.

 

“I am older than I appear to be. I spent many years living under Earth’s yellow sun while my father worked with your people to improve your living conditions.” Softly, she stroked her fingers over Alex’s wrist. “As you must know, we do not age the way you do on Earth.”

 

Nodding, Alex hung on every word Kara was speaking.

 

For some reason, knowing why this Kara loved her Alex was _important_.

 

“My love, my Zrhymin, was a doctor on Earth. A healer.” Kara’s eyes shone with pride, and there was that look of love again. Plain as day, for anyone to see. “I met her on the scene of an accident. I offered my assistance…”

 

“And what did I-- I mean, what did she do?” Alex’s heart was beating fast again.

 

That was a life she could have led.

 

If things had been different.

 

“She yelled at me,” Kara confessed, a bright smile overtaking her features. “She told me to get on my knees and put pressure on an open leg wound.” She looked away. “I knew then what I know now. That we are one.”

 

-

 

Lying on her back, Alex stared up at the dark ceiling of her apartment.

 

The other Kara was back at the DEO, and Alex was terribly lonely without _her_ Kara by her side.

 

Hearing about that other version of herself had been alternately pleasant and painful. Clearly, the other Alex had her issues as well, but she’d been much more open to love than Alex herself. She’d known she was a lesbian for years before she’d met Kara.

 

And she hadn’t been burdened by her mother constantly telling her that Kara was her sister.

 

Because the other Kara hadn’t known Alex until she was in her twenties, and yet they’d still found each other.

 

God, Alex missed Kara.

 

 _Her_ Kara.

 

The one who hogged all of the blankets, even though she was a living, breathing furnace. The one who never shared her potstickers and always made Alex feel guilty for drinking. The one who hugged Alex so tightly that Alex forgot where she begun and Kara ended.

 

Turning over in her bed, Alex pulled up her legs and wrapped her arms around them.

  
“Come back soon,” she whispered. “Come back to me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> poor alex. i also hope kara comes back soon. 
> 
> Part 2 tomorrow! thanks to beaglesinbowties for putting up with me c:
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	4. who are you [Part 2]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Lawks" [Kara x Alex; mild angst, mostly fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Alex hopes Kara comes back soon, because the other Kara is too sweet for her own good."

“Good morning, Agent Danvers,” Kara said, bowing softly before Alex. 

 

She was wearing a long, flowing skirt that Alex was pretty sure J’onn had taken from Kara’s wardrobe, and one of Alex’s oversized sweaters. It was a present that Kara had given to her for Christmas a couple of years ago.

 

“I hope you do not mind that I borrowed this from your collection of clothing here,” Kara continued, smoothing her hands over the fabric. “It reminds me of home.” 

 

It took Alex a couple of seconds to understand that Kara meant her scent, and it made a blush crawl over her cheeks.

 

“No, yeah, of course,” she sputtered, crossing her arms over her chest and trying not to imagine this to be her own Kara. “Take whatever you need. It’s our fault that you’re in this mess in the first place, and I want you to feel at home while you wait for Winn to figure out how to work the portal.”

 

The other Kara grimaced apologetically.

 

“I wish I could help, but I am afraid that my knowledge of such things is very limited. My father is the scientist in our family. Sadly, I did not inherit his passion, unlike Kal-El.” She clasped her hands in front of her body. “If there is anything that I can do to help, please tell me.”

 

Nodding, Alex reached out instinctively to squeeze Kara’s arm.

 

“Of course,” she said, strangely pleased when Kara leaned into her touch. “We have great people working on this. Now that you’re here, we’re devoting a ton of more resources to the project. Winn was basically working on it by himself before.”

 

The other Kara smiled gently and placed her own hand over Alex’s.

 

“J’onn tells me that you are a scientist as well,” she said, looking so much like Alex’s Kara that it made Alex’s heart ache. “My Zrh y min had such aspirations as well in her youth, before she decided she would much rather help people more directly.”

 

Guilt flashed in her eyes.

 

“Not that I am trying to diminish your work here,” she said, her fingers twitching with nervousness. “I am sure that what you do is of great importance. My Alex became a renowned and revered scientist on Krypton after we mated.”

 

The word  _ mated  _ made Alex blush all over again.

 

“That sounds fascinating, actually,” Alex forced herself to say, slowly pulling back her hand. 

 

“She would have been much more helpful than I,” Kara replied sadly, a look of longing crossing her features that reminded Alex far too much of what she saw in the mirror every morning. “I am sure she will be looking for me.”

 

Sighing, Alex put her own needs and worries aside to pull this other Kara into a hug. 

 

“We will get you back to her,” Alex whispered, fiercely believing her own words. If she couldn’t handle her own life and figure out her feelings for Kara, then she at least wanted her alternate self to be happy. “I promise.”

 

“Thank you,” Kara sniffed, her hands holding Alex tightly. “I am glad your Kara has you in her life. I could not imagine a world where we are not with one another.” She buried her face in Alex’s neck. “And I am glad that the machine has brought me to you. If it had to take me, I am happy that you were the one to find me.”

 

Alex hoped her own Kara would be back soon.

 

She wouldn’t be able to take this by herself for much longer.

 

-

 

“This is where my other self lives?” Kara asked, looking around at the mess in her other self’s apartment. “Am I somehow powerfully adverse to cleaning?” She lifted up a sketchbook that Kara had left on the dining room table. “We Kryptonians do have super speed on this planet, yes?”

 

Grinning quietly to herself, Alex slipped off her leather jacket and hung it up on the coat rack by the door.

 

“You do,” she confirmed, taking off her shoes. “I think Kara picked up the messiness from me, actually. When she first came to live with us, she was terrified of everything, because she’d never been here before, but she said the mess in my room made her feel safe.”

 

Furrowing her brows, Kara flipped open the cover of the sketchbook.

 

“I do not follow,” she said, sliding her fingers over the sketches. 

 

“She investigated all of my things and x-rayed everything, and after that she knew that nothing in my room could hurt me, because it was all out in the open. And all over the floor, mainly,” Alex continued, opening the fridge and pulling out a beer. “I think Kara’s actually messier than me now.”

 

A small smile slid over the other Kara’s face.

 

“Your life together sounds very sweet,” she said, flipping to another sketch. “I saw pictures of my Zrh y min from when she was younger. I hope our children will be as adorable.” She placed her hand on her stomach, a dreamy look on her face.

 

At the thought of having children with Kara, Alex took a huge swig of beer.

 

“These sketches are quite good,” Kara observed. Walking slowly, she joined Alex at the kitchen island and showed her one of the pages. It was a sketch of Alex. She was sitting on a bench, a half-eaten hot dog casually held in one hand. “Your Kara has a keen eye for detail.”

 

Alex’s chest swelled with pride.

 

“Do you want to see her collection of prizes and awards?” Suddenly, her melancholy evaporated. “She doesn’t like to show them off, so she keeps them in a box in her closet, but I polish them sometimes.”

 

She was on her way to Kara’s bedroom before the other Kara could say a word.

 

The beer sat forgotten on the kitchen island.

 

-

 

“Our high school didn’t have the best art department, but even they could tell that Kara was amazing,” Alex gushed as she pushed the prizes and awards back into the closet. “She gave one of them to me as a gift.” She patted the left side of her chest. “I keep it in my jacket.”

 

While she talked, the other Kara wandered around the room, taking in the many picture frames on the walls and on the bedside table. 

 

“You are very proud of her,” she observed, a small smile playing along her lips. “My Zrh y min is the same. Always bragging about the strong judicator she wedded.” She chuckled. “It is truly very cute.” 

 

“It’s very easy to be proud of Kara,” Alex replied, closing the door to the closet before she sat down on the bed. “I’m sure my other self isn’t exaggerating when she talks about you.” 

 

The smile the other Kara gave her was gentle.

 

“Thank you,” she whispered, bowing slightly. “You honor me with your words, Agent Danvers.”

 

Her words brought a new blush to Alex’s cheek. 

 

_ Agent Danvers _ .

 

She desperately needed to keep herself in check.

 

“I was thinking we could order some of my Kara’s favorite food and put on some of her favorite movies. And I would love to hear about how humans reacted when you contacted them for the first time.” Alex got up from the bed just as the other Kara picked up one of the picture frames from the bedside table.

 

“This is very sweet,” Kara murmured, looking down at Alex’s smiling face as this universe’s Kara kissed her face, the Eiffel Tower clearly visible in the background. “When did this take place?”

 

Stepping up behind her, Alex plucked the frame out of her fingers.

 

“My mom bought us a trip to Paris when I finished my PhD.” She wiped the sleeve of her sweater over the dust that had accumulated over the last several years. “I wanted to go to Rome, but my mom knew Kara would prefer Paris.” She rolled her eyes.

 

The trip had been absolutely perfect.

 

“Would you mind if I kept this?” Kara asked, her hand settling over Alex’s fingers on the frame. “I would like to show my Alex who we are here.” 

 

Alex almost dropped the picture.

 

“Yeah, yeah, sure,” she said, turning it over to take out the back of the frame. “I’ll just print out another picture for Kara. I’m sure she’ll be fine with it. Maybe you’ll even get to meet her, if she comes back before we figure out how to fix the portal.”

 

If Kara hadn’t already been killed by whatever unnamed horror had greeted her on the other Earth.

 

The other Kara’s fingers steadied Alex’s shaking hands.

 

“You worry for her,” she said, taking the photograph out of the frame before replacing the back. “I am sure she will return to you unharmed. If she loves you as much as I feel that she does, she would not dare to leave you alone.”

 

Sighing, Alex scrubbed a hand over her face.

 

“She left without telling me anything,” she confessed, staring down at the photograph in the other Kara’s hand. “I’ve been pushing Winn to finish the portal so that I could follow her. That’s why you’re here. I pushed too hard.”

 

Shaking her head, Kara placed the frame and picture onto the bed.

 

“You love her,” she said, cupping Alex’s cheeks. “You do not have to apologize to me for that.”

 

Sudden tears sprang to Alex’s eyes, but she forced the emotion down and looked away. She couldn’t talk about this with  _ Kara _ . It didn’t matter that this wasn’t  _ her  _ Kara. There was no way Alex could ever say the words out loud.

 

“You should tell her,” Kara whispered, leaning in and pressing a gentle kiss against Alex’s forehead. 

 

“I can’t,” Alex choked out, pulling away from the touch and wiping roughly at her eyes. This wasn’t the time or the place. Clearing her throat, she picked up the picture and handed it back over to Kara. “Now how about that movie marathon?”

 

Kara’s smile was understanding, but Alex stalked out of the bedroom anyway.

 

-

 

“I have excellent taste,” the other Kara gushed as she stuffed another potsticker into her mouth. “I cannot believe I have never had these before. How did I miss such a crucial part of human society?”

 

At least this part was the same.

 

“I wouldn’t call potstickers  _ crucial _ ,” Alex teased her, biting into her slice of pizza. 

 

She’d ordered various kinds of foods, because it wasn’t like it would go bad with Kara around. And maybe, if Alex was lucky, her own Kara would be back soon as well. Kara was heavily invested in the idea of leftover pizza and Chinese food being somehow even more delicious than the fresh kinds.

 

“Clearly, my other self has not made you properly aware,” Kara replied, quickly devouring another potsticker. “Try one.” She held one of them out to Alex with her fork. The sight of Kara giving away a potsticker was so strange that it took Alex several seconds to respond.

 

“I know potstickers are delicious,” Alex said, waving her hand around to tell Kara to keep it for herself. She was already plenty full, and it wouldn’t feel right to take the potsticker away from the other Kara. “I just don’t think they’re as good as some other stuff.”

 

Shaking her head, Kara quickly demolished what was left in the box on her lap.

 

The movie  _ Step Up _ was playing in the background.

 

“I hope I will get to meet the other me, so I can tell her about how much she has failed you,” Kara said, sighing regretfully as she picked up one of the slices of pizza. She looked happy and content when she bit into it, which probably meant that she’d had pizza before. 

 

“I bet she would love to give you a hug,” Alex replied, smiling at the mental image. “She was very disappointed to hear that the other Earth didn’t have a Supergirl. I guess that universe might be one where Kara never left Krypton.”

 

She didn’t want to think about what that could imply.

 

A world where Kara and Clark had died with Krypton before they could be sent away?

 

A world where Krypton survived without help?

 

A world… where Kara never existed in the first place?

 

“Oh, yes, that reminds me,” the other Kara called out, pulling Alex out of her depressing thoughts. “Since you were so kind to give me one of your pictures, I would like to leave you with one of  mine.” She pulled a necklace out from under her oversized sweater. “Just in case I am returned to my own world without meeting your Kara.” 

 

She opened the clasp at the back and laid the swinging pendant out on her palm. It was round and perfectly see-through, and Alex immediately recognized it to be a crystal. 

 

“ _ Open _ ,” Kara whispered in Kryptonese. 

 

Almost instantly, a hologram was projected out of the crystal, showing the other Kara and her Alex standing together. Their foreheads were pressed together and Kara’s fingers were splayed over the other Alex’s cheeks. Meanwhile, Alex’s arms were wrapped around Kara’s waist. 

 

They both wore matching red robes.

 

“Our mating ceremony,” Kara said, smiling fondly. “I am sorry I cannot give you any other picture of us.” She’d clearly seen the sliver of pain that had slipped over Alex’s features. “ _ Close _ .”

 

“Thank you,” Alex replied, voice thick with emotion as she accepted the pendant and held it tightly in her hand.

 

-

 

“I need a bit more time,” Winn said, rubbing the back of his head in frustration as he stared down at his schematics. “I’m really sorry, I wish I had better news. This whole interdimensional travel problem is riding me  _ hard _ .”

 

Raising an eyebrow, Alex bit her bottom lip to keep herself from commenting. She knew that Winn was currently being ridden hard by  _ nobody _ , since he hadn’t come up with the courage to ask James out for a date yet.

 

Maybe the interdimensional travel would actually be good for him.

 

“Do you have a rough time estimate?” Alex asked, crossing her arms over her chest while the other Kara sat primly on one of the office chairs. Even though she’d been married to a version of Alex for a couple of years, she was still as rigidly Kryptonian as ever.

 

Grimacing, Winn shrugged apologetically.

 

“I don’t know. A couple of days? Weeks? I can’t seem to figure out how to keep the portal from going up in flames  _ every time _ I try to use it, and I don’t want any more Karas to come bursting out of there. No offence.” He lifted his hands and smiled at Kara. “You’re great, but I know that there’s a Kara out there somewhere who was raised by an even worse version of Astra.”

 

The other Kara perked up at the mention of her aunt.

 

“Astra? Is she here? Did she not die on Krypton?” She was on her feet in a second. She’d opted for one of Kara’s yellow sundresses today, even though she was wearing one of Alex’s leather jackets. The whole image was somewhat idiosyncratic.

 

Now that she’d been here for about five days and she’d left the DEO multiple times - to see the Earth as it would have been without Kryptonian influence - she’d also taken to wearing a pair of Kara’s spare glasses.

 

Alex shook her head.

 

“I’m sorry,” she said, uncrossing her arms and squeezing Kara’s shoulder. “She left the planet a couple of months ago.” Right after Alex stabbed her, actually. Well, a couple of weeks later. “She wanted to see for herself if there were any other survivors around Krypton who might be stranded or living on various other planets.”

 

“That sounds like her,” Kara said, face dejected. “If she saw our planet’s destruction, I would have loved to tell her how our Krypton thrived because of her. With the help of my mother, she convinced the council to reach out to Earth for help.”

 

Winn raised both of his eyebrows, but the look Alex gave him made him shut up before he could even utter a single word. Alex wouldn’t tarnish Kara’s view of her aunt by telling her about what this version of Astra had done (and had been trying to do).

 

“Hey, maybe you can record a video for her,” Winn suggested, smiling brightly at his idea. “That way, we can show it to her when she gets back.” 

 

_ If  _ Astra ever came back.

 

But Alex didn’t even want to think about what it would do to her Kara if her aunt never returned.

 

“That sounds like a great idea,” Alex said, giving Winn an approving nod, which made his chest puff up with pride. “I’m going to get the video equipment from tech and then we can get started on this thing.”

 

Kara smiled.

 

“Thank you both,” she said, bowing first to Winn and then to Alex. 

 

When they both simultaneously reached up to rub the backs of their necks, Alex wondered when Winn had started copying her mannerisms, or the other way around. 

 

-

 

Alex’s Kara returned on a rainy Wednesday afternoon. 

 

Three weeks after she’d initially disappeared with no warning. The only thing left had been a hastily scrawled note that Alex had almost knocked off the table when she’d come into Kara’s apartment with a box of pizza and a jumbo pack of snowcaps.

 

The portal opened directly into Kara’s living room, and she landed ungracefully as the portal shoved her into the kitchen island. She was still wearing her Supergirl outfit, even though it was charred in places and looked awfully worse for wear.

 

Her appearance was so sudden, that the other Kara jumped.

 

“ _ Lawks _ !” she called out, instinctively going into her native Kryptonese tongue, which caused Alex’s Kara to lift her head in surprise. It had been a while since Alex and Kara had spoken to each other in Kryptonese. 

 

Occasionally, whenever Kara felt especially homesick for Krypton, Alex would whisper to her in Kryptonese. Make her feel at home in a world that wasn’t her own. 

 

Kara’s eyes nearly bugged out of her head as she spotted the other version of herself in Alex’s arms. They’d been cuddling on the couch as they watched an episode of a television show that didn’t exist in the other Kara’s universe. 

 

Alex’s arm was wrapped around the other Kara’s shoulder. Over the last few weeks, the two had become friends, and even though it wasn’t the same (for either of them) they took comfort in each other’s presence.

 

Mouth wide open, Kara stared at the two of them for a couple of seconds, before going immediately into a fighting stance.

 

“Alex… get away from that imposter,” she growled, her face fierce as she glared at the other Kara. “I don’t know how you managed to trick my sister into thinking that you’re me, but I’m here now, so your little game is over.”

 

Alarmed, Alex sprung to her feet, both hands lifted.

 

“Kara, it’s okay,” she said, rounding the couch in three quick strides. “This is you from another dimension. She’s stranded here until we can find out a way to send her back to her own universe.” Gently, she placed her hands over Kara’s fists. “Everyone’s safe.”

 

Slowly, Kara lowered her fists, her eyes moving around Alex and to the other Kara.

 

This was going to get confusing very quickly.

 

“Hi,” Kara said, an apologetic look coming over her features. “Sorry that I yelled at you. I wasn’t sure if maybe Alex hadn’t gotten my message that I’d left to help Barry with his problems.” She pointed behind her with her thumb to where the portal had spit her out. “In his universe.”

 

A second later, she furrowed her brows when Alex kicked her against her shin.

 

“Of course I got your note, and you have got a  _ lot _ of explaining to do,” Alex growled, before she couldn’t stop herself from pulling Kara into a crushing hug. After all, she hadn’t seen her sister in three weeks. 

 

_ Three weeks _ .

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara whispered, her returning hug just as crushing. “I wanted to come back sooner,  but the whole saving the world thing is so goddamn hard sometimes. And I couldn’t leave the others to fend for themselves.”

 

Breathing in Kara’s scent, Alex felt her shoulders relax for the first time in three weeks.

 

“Three weeks? Really? You couldn’t pop back in once to tell me you’re okay?” Alex demanded, pulling away and crossing her arms over her chest. “Allen’s the fastest man alive and he couldn’t zoom you over her for even a second?”

 

To Alex’s great satisfaction, Kara actually looked properly chastised.

 

“I’m sorry,” she said again, the pout on her face almost enough to make Alex forgive her on her spot. “But at least you weren’t by yourself! At least you had this other version of me to keep you company!”

 

Rounding Alex, Kara walked over to the couch, where the other Kara was still sitting, her hands folded in her lap. She was still wearing the Kara-glasses as well, which made the whole thing look even more bizarre. 

 

“Hi again,” Kara said, stretching out her hand for a firm shake. “I’m this universe’s Kara. I hope Alex has been taking good care of you.” Her grin was bright and friendly, and it made the other Kara relax significantly. “How did you get here anyway?”

 

Before Alex could stop her, the other Kara spilled the beans.

 

“Alex wanted to come after you, so she could protect you on the other Earth,” she said, also getting up from the couch so she didn’t have to keep looking up at Kara. “But Winn had not perfected the technology yet, which is how I was accidentally transferred here.”

 

Kara’s eyes snapped back to Alex.

 

“You and Winn built a portal so you could come and help me?” she asked, her voice warm and gentle. 

 

“We built a portal so that I could kick your ass for not coming by to talk to me first before you literally left this plane of existence,” Alex grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest. “Which we will discuss at length, by the way. That is not happening again.”

 

Kara saluted.

 

“Aye aye, ma’am,” she said, grinning brightly before she wrapped her arm around the other Kara’s shoulder, who was giving the two of them a knowing look that Alex didn’t want to dwell on. “So, how’s life on the other Earth.”

 

Again, Alex wished she could keep the truth to herself.

 

Alas, she was not that lucky.

 

-

 

“You could have let her sleep in here,” Kara whispered as they lay in bed together. They usually weren’t shy with their touches, but ever since the other Kara had told the story of how she’d mated with her version of Alex, Kara had been acting weird.

 

“That didn’t feel right without asking you,” Alex replied, her hands folded on top of her blanket. There was plenty of space in between her and Kara, and Alex couldn’t help but feel like something had changed. “I let her sleep over at my place a couple of times.”

 

“That was nice of you,” Kara said. She was staring at the ceiling, and Alex quickly mimicked her.

 

“She said it made her feel more like she’s at home.” Alex shifted her legs around. “You know, because she’s used to living with me in her world.” Sleeping in a bed with a Kara Alex barely knew had been more than strange, but she’d been happy to do it if it meant her new friend could feel less homesick.

 

“That hologram of their mating ceremony looks really cute,” Kara said suddenly, voice almost too casual. “I bet they had a really nice ceremony. She told me that Astra officiated.” Kara shifted her legs as well. “Maybe we can visit her world once we have the portal up and running.”

 

Humming her assent, Alex slipped a little further down the bed.

 

“Yeah.” Alex could feel the awkwardness choking her. “I hope you don’t mind that I gave her that picture of us. She said she wanted something to remember us by.” She drummed her fingers up and down on the duvet.

 

“No, I don’t mind,” Kara said, lifting up her hand and running it through her hair. 

 

“Cool… cool…” Alex blinked a couple of times.

 

“Yeah,” Kara replied, chancing a glance at Alex and looking away when their eyes met. “Anyway, I think I’m going to try to get some sleep. Goodnight.” And she turned onto her side, with her back facing Alex.

 

“Night,” Alex replied, clenching her teeth before she rolled onto her side as well, also facing away from Kara. 

 

She hoped things would go back to normal soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alas there must be a part 3! you'll get it tomorrow
> 
> hope you enjoyed! thanks to beagles for betaing! :)
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	5. who are you [Part 3]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Dram" [Alex x Kara; Angst]
> 
> Summary: "Winn finishes the portal. Alex fucks up."
> 
> This chapter is rated **E for Explicit**.

“I am actually a genius,” Winn called out, throwing his hands into the air and ripping off his plastic goggles at the same time. “I am a genius. A genius.” He danced where he stood, slowly moving his hips from side to side. 

 

Alex watched him with an expression of mild amusement while the other Kara smiled at his antics. 

 

“Did you fix it?” Alex asked, walking forward and sliding her hand onto the other Kara’s shoulder to give her a reassuring squeeze. “Can we finally get Kara here back to where she belongs?” 

 

The other Kara leaned against her side.

 

“I think so,” Winn said, grabbing one of the bottles that stood on a table off to the sides. “We just need… a dram… of… this…” His hands moved slowly and methodically as he dropped small amounts of the silvery liquid onto the base of the portal. “Just to get it all nice and… Whoa!”

 

With a hiss, the portal sprang to life, causing Winn to stumble back and crash into a nearby office chair.

 

When nothing else happened, Alex relaxed the grip she had on her gun. Just in case the portal brought someone to them that wasn’t as friendly as the other Kara had been. 

 

At least this time they had two Karas.

 

“Okay, that was just a bit anticlimactic,” Winn said as they all kept staring at the portal. 

 

“I don’t know; I thought it was pretty funny,” Alex replied, walking over to him and kicking the desk chair he was half-sitting, half-lying on. “I’d say that was a pretty good performance overall. Seven out of ten. Might have been an eight if you’d actually fallen off the chair, too.”

 

Winn pouted up at her, while the other Kara giggled at their squabbling.

 

Grinning, Alex barely noticed how her own Kara had entered the room behind them.

 

“Alex? Could I talk to you for a moment?” she asked, not looking at anybody in the room. 

 

“Yeah, sure. We need to run some tests on the portal anyway before we can send Kara back to her own dimension,” Alex said, smiling at the other Kara and giving her a reassuring look. Alex was glad that she could make good on her promise of bringing her home.

 

Even though Winn had done most of the work.

 

“You go,” Winn said, waving her off as he got back to his feet. “That gives me and Kara some time to continue our conversation about which movies and TV shows she’s going to need to take back with her.”

 

Alex chuckled.

 

“Don’t forget music and video games,” Alex said as she followed her own Kara out of the room. “And books! We need to buy her an e-reader!”

 

“Will do!” Winn replied, saluting her before he went back to work. 

 

Alex’s smile vanished when she noticed the tension in Kara’s shoulders and the weird way she was walking. Almost like she was moving towards her own execution or something equally as dreadful.

 

She’d only been home for two days, but Alex could tell that something was seriously wrong with her sister. She just couldn’t figure out if it was because of the other Kara and what she’d told them about her and Alex, or if this was about something that had happened on the other Earth with Barry and the other superheroes.

 

Alex had a feeling it was because of the other Kara, but she simply couldn’t be sure, because Kara had been keeping her lips shut tight about anything that didn’t involve work. She’d barely even spoken to Alex about what the other Earth had been like, which left Alex extremely worried.

 

Kara was as excitable as a newborn puppy on any other given day and the fact that she’d been so silent was unendingly strange.

 

Once they’d reached one of the empty offices littered all over the DEO tower in the city, Kara crossed her arms over her chest and started pacing back and forth. 

 

Alex sat down on one of the black chairs.

 

“What do you need?” she asked, folding her hands across her belly and looking up at her sister with a soft expression. Maybe Kara would finally tell her what the issue was and they could go back to being fine with one another. 

 

“I’ve been thinking,” Kara said, still pacing back and forth. “Once we have this portal, maybe we should use it more often.” That was not what Alex had expected. At all.

 

“Okay…?” she replied slowly, her eyes following the swishing of Kara’s cape. “But that could potentially leave us open to attack from other dimensions. Not everyone is as friendly as Barry or Kara.”

 

Kara stopped pacing.

 

“When do you think the portal is  _ really  _ going to be ready?” She seemed to be almost antsy to hear the answer, and her eyes were intense as she regarded Alex. “Do you think she’ll be able to come back?”

 

Furrowing her brows, Alex got up from her chair.

 

“What is this really about, Kara?” Alex had a feeling she already knew.

 

“It’s just a question,” Kara protested, taking a step back when Alex took one forward. “I just think it would be a wonderful resource to have access to other worlds. Barry was able to ask me for help. Imagine how much good we could do if we were able to call in other versions of ourselves, or- or--”

 

She stopped speaking when Alex wrapped her up in a hug.

 

“I’m sorry,” Alex whispered, her arms holding Kara tightly to herself. “I didn’t even think about what the other Kara’s Earth and Krypton could mean for you.” Alex squeezed her eyes shut and took in her sister’s scent.

 

Her real scent.

 

Kara’s shoulders shook with silent sobs.

 

“My parents,” she gasped, her nails digging painfully into Alex’s clothes and skin when she hugged her back. “I could see them again. She never lost them. I could talk to them, I-- I could hold them.”

 

Alex wished she could hold Kara even closer to herself.

 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered again. “I’m sorry.”

 

-

 

“Is she alright?” the other Kara asked as Alex came back into the lab after sending Kara home with the promise of pizza and snowcaps later. “She seemed very distressed.” The other Kara got up from her chair and nervously folded her hands in front of her body. She hadn’t acted this formally Kryptonian around Alex for over two weeks now. “Is there anything I can do?”

 

Alex grimaced. She didn’t want to betray her Kara’s confidence, but she also didn’t see any point in lying about what the real problem was.

 

Which, apparently, didn’t have anything to do with Alex at all.

 

The revelation stung just a bit.

 

A lot.

 

“She’s thinking about coming to visit your dimension,” Alex said quietly so Winn and two of the other people in the lab couldn’t hear them. One of them was James, who was helping them out by reading some of the numbers on a measuring machine out loud.

 

At least Winn seemed to be getting somewhere with his crush.

 

So much bisexual privilege.

 

Alex almost rolled her eyes at her own stupid internal joke.

 

“She misses our people,” Kara observed astutely, reaching up with one of her hands and placing it over her mouth, a look of profound sadness coming over her features. “Of course. I cannot believe I was so callous towards her.”

 

Frowning, Alex crossed her arms over her chest.

 

“What do you mean?” she asked, wondering if she’d missed any major conversations between the two Karas. 

 

The other Kara shook her head.

 

“I should not have spoken to her about how our people have thrived since we asked humanity for help,” she whispered, lowering the hand back to her front. “I should have known it would hurt her.” She clenched her jaw. “And to hear that I was blessed with both our Kryptonian and human families when she had to suffer the death of almost every single person on our planet.”

 

Sighing, Alex placed her hands on the other Kara’s shoulders.

 

“Kara’s stronger than she looks.” She pulled the other Kara into a hug, noting how different it felt.

 

“I do not wish to speak ill of her emotional strength,” the other Kara said against Alex’s shoulder, clearly comforted by the embrace. “But if she feels as strongly as I do, then I would like nothing better than to take her with me for a time. To meet our parents in a different world so she may hold them once more.” She pulled away. “Thank you for telling me.”

 

Nodding, Alex tried for a smile.

 

“I’ll tell her that you said that,” she promised, squeezing Kara’s forearm. “Are you sure you’re going to be fine hanging out with Winn, Lucy, James and Maggie all by yourself?” The five of them were planning a proper movie night so the other Kara could finally be properly introduced into their friendship group. 

 

The other Kara smiled brightly.

 

“I cannot wait to finish that fascinating  _ Star Wars _ movie series,” she said, folding her hand over the one Alex had on her arm. “I have been told that there is a wonderful heroine in the seventh movie.”

 

Alex chuckled.

 

No matter which universe, she was no match for any Kara’s cuteness.

 

-

 

“Kara?” Alex called, feeling a terrifying sense of déjà vu when she opened the front door with a large box of pizza and a jumbo package of snowcaps. The last time she’d been in this position, Kara had been gone.

 

Alex tried not to think about that.

 

“I’m on the couch,” Kara called back, sounding strangely like she’d been crying. When Alex looked over, she saw the red nose and flushed cheeks. Then she spotted the trash can next to the couch, which meant Kara had dragged it over for the express purpose of throwing her tissues directly into it.

 

Sighing, Alex kicked the door shut behind her and positioned the food on Kara’s living room table before taking off her shoes and jacket. 

 

“I brought comfort food,” Alex said, taking the pizza and snowcaps and carrying them over to the couch. She’d get herself a beer once Kara had been fed. 

 

Her sister had her hair in a messy bun and she was wearing a pair of fluffy pajama pants. And if Alex wasn’t mistaken, she also had one of Alex’s old college t-shirts on under a comfy sweatshirt. The emblem was old and faded by now.

 

“Hey, kid,” Alex said, setting the food down on the coffee table in front of Kara and pressing a kiss against her sister’s head. “If this isn’t enough, I’ll order you some Chinese.” She rubbed the fingers of her left hand along the back of Kara’s neck. “Let me just grab a beer.”

 

By the time she got back to the couch, Kara had already devoured half of the pizza and the television was set to some nature documentary that Alex had absolutely zero interest in. She didn’t complain, though, because she knew Kara found them relaxing.

 

“I talked to the other Kara,” Alex said, forcing her voice to stay casual. “She said she’d love it if you came to the other universe with her.” She took a sip of her beer and waited to gauge Kara’s reaction. “I thought about what you said, and I think it might be good for you to go there at some point.”

 

Kara was silent, carefully chewing on her piece of pizza.

 

“I don’t think we should keep the portal open all the time, but we could definitely make an exception. And I think it would be cool to meet the other version of me.” Alex wiped her sweaty hand on her pant leg. “I kind of want to know why she’s apparently so much cooler than me.”

 

She grinned, but Kara didn’t grin back.

 

“Do you want me to shut up? ‘Cause I can totally do that for you,” Alex said, putting down her beer so she could wipe her other hand, too. “I just wanted you to know I discussed it with the other Kara, so we’d all be on the same page.”

 

Kara looked away.

 

“I don’t want to talk about the other Kara anymore,” she whispered, curling her hands together in her lap. She pulled up her legs so she could cross them on the couch. “Ever since I came back, you’ve been talking about nothing else. The other Kara this, the other Kara that.”

 

Biting her bottom lip, Alex dug her nails into her thighs.

 

“I figured you might like to know what you missed while you were away,” Alex replied, feeling like she’d just been slapped in the face. “Besides, I’m not the one who left without telling you anything.”

 

Kara scowled.

 

“How many times do I have to apologize for that?” Kara asked, her voice taking on a nasty undertone that Alex hadn’t heard since the red kryptonite episode. “It was a life or death situation, Alex, and I don’t need you to hold my hand when I make decisions.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Alex forcefully relaxed her fingers and released her tense shoulders.

 

“Okay,” she said, her voice shaking from the effort of keeping it friendly. “Maybe we just need to calm down and talk about what’s been bothering us.”

 

“Don’t do that,” Kara snapped, turning her angry eyes on Alex.

 

“Do what?”

 

“Don’t patronize me,” Kara demanded, her hands shaking in her lap. 

 

Alex clenched her jaw, trying to decide if she should leave or if she should tough it out and get to the bottom of their real problem. Because clearly what they were doing right now wasn’t the issue. Clearly there was something else that had Kara so furious.

 

“Fine, so don’t calm down,” Alex finally hissed, grabbing a beer and taking a big swig of it. “Maybe while you’re this angry, we can discuss why you’ve basically been ignoring me ever since you came back. Or why you flinch every time I try to touch or. Or how you treat Kara, when she’s just trying to be nice to you.”

 

She was shaking with rage and desperately trying to keep herself under control. She was the bigger sister; she was supposed to protect Kara; she was supposed to be the bigger person. But goddamn was it hard.

 

“Well there’s really no point in spending time with you when you clearly like her so much better than me,” Kara shouted back, her arms now crossed so tightly across her chest Alex was starting to think they might break off.

 

For a moment, Alex was too stunned to speak.

 

“You think I like her better than you?” she asked, all the anger evaporating from her body. “Kara, that’s ridiculous.”

 

“Is it?” Kara asked caustically. “You basically spend every second of every day with her.”

 

Alex frowned.

 

“Because it’s my fault that she’s here!” she retorted, feeling the anger return with a vengeance. “I forced Winn to build that portal so I could go and help  _ you _ ! And I can’t just abandon her now that you’re back.” 

 

Finally, Kara exploded.

 

“She already has her own damn Alex, she doesn’t get to have mine, too!” she yelled, grabbing Alex by the lapels of her blue and white flannel shirt and pulling her closer. “She has everything I’ve ever wanted.” Kara’s words were quiet now as she cupped Alex’s cheeks. “I loved you first. It’s not fair.”

 

Alex’s heart seemed about ready to jump out of her chest, and in a move of idiotic bravery, she tipped forward to press her lips against Kara’s. 

 

She’d expected to be pushed away, but instead Kara pulled her closer and wrapped her arms around her neck, moving her lips hungrily against Alex’s mouth. Their kisses were anything but gentle, and Alex could still feel the anger and pain in them as she bit down on Kara’s bottom lip and leaned forward, forcing Kara onto her back.

 

She covered her sister’s body on the couch, her hands grabbing at Kara’s waist while they continued to make out, delivering harsh bites and soothing strokes of the tongue in equal measure.

 

“I’m yours,” Alex husked breathlessly as she pushed her hand under Kara’s t-shirt and slipped her hand under her sister’s bra. Kara moaned when Alex’s fingers made contact with her nipple, squeezing and pulling. “I’m yours.”

 

Kara’s hands ran down Alex’s back, before she brought them to the front and ripped open Alex’s flannel shirt, buttons flying in all directions. Her nails left harsh, red indents on Alex’s abdominal muscles before Kara ripped Alex’s belt and jeans open without much fanfare.

 

“Say it again,” Kara moaned, just as Alex slipped her own hand into her sister’s pajama pants, uncaring of what this might mean for them in the future. As her hand found slick heat and a stiff clit, Alex whimpered.

 

“I’m yours, I’m yours, I’m yours,” she groaned as she slipped inside of Kara, moving her fingers back and forth, in and out. Panting, Alex moved her mouth down from Kara’s lips and to her throat instead, leaving harsh and biting kisses in her wake.

 

She wished Kara could bruise.

 

She desperately wanted to leave her mark. 

 

Kara whimpered and groaned with every thrust, before she pushed her own hand into Alex’s jeans. Feeling her sister’s fingers on her, inside of her, was almost more than Alex could bear, and she knew it would take no time at all for her to come. 

 

She moved her hips to the rhythm of Kara’s fingers, wishing they could stay connected like this forever as she pushed and pushed; into Kara, into the woman she loved. The sister that had never really felt like a sister.

 

“Fuck,” Alex grunted, feeling the telltale signs of her orgasm as a tingle in her legs and stomach. “Kara…” She whispered the name almost reverently as her sister pushed harder and harder, almost bordering on painful but never quite reaching that point. “I love you.” 

 

Warmth spread through Alex’s entire body as Kara ground her hand into her clit, causing Alex to still and cry out her sister’s name, her teeth wrapped around Kara’s jugular vein. 

 

The orgasm was intense, and when she came back to herself, she pushed harder and faster into Kara. She could still feel Kara’s hand in her pants, resting inside of her, as though she was reluctant to leave and let this moment go.

 

When Kara came, there was no sound.

 

Just the tightening of muscles and her teeth biting down on Alex’s neck, making Alex cry out for a second time, now from pain. Her teeth broke the skin, and Alex knew she’d be carrying around the mark for a while.

 

She hardly even cared.

 

When Kara let her go, Alex collapsed on top of her, panting. Watching Kara orgasm had almost brought her back to the brink, but she had a nagging feeling that they wouldn’t go for a round two. 

 

Neither of them spoke for several moments while they both recovered.

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara whispered, her hand shaking as she pulled it out of Alex’s pants. The motion cause Alex to shudder, and the feeling of Kara’s hand trailing come along Alex’s stomach didn’t make this any better. “I’m sorry.”

 

Alex pulled away.

 

“No, I’m sorry,” she said, scooting away on the couch and reaching down to do up her pants, only to realize that they were ruined. Kara had broken not only the button but also the zipper. Her belt buckle lay on the floor. “I’ll go.”

 

Her entire body was shaking as she got to her feet. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara whispered again, pressing her hands against her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

 

Alex almost fell as she walked around the couch. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Kara sounded like a broken record.

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Alex said as she quickly slipped on her leather jacket and shoes and tried to pull her pants together so it wouldn’t look like it was broken. 

  
As she walked out into the evening air, Alex knew she’d fucked up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this things keeps growing... see you tomorrow for part 4!
> 
> also sorry. and thanks to beaglesinbowties for checking this over!
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	6. who are you [Part 4]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt/Word: "Cattywampus" [Alex x Kara; Angst]
> 
> Summary: "Alex and Kara deal with the consequences of what they've done. Somewhat."

Fuck.

 

Fuck.

 

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

 

“Fuck,” Alex whispered, burying her face in her hands before pushing her fingers through her hair. She’d well and truly fucked up now and there was no easy fix for this. No falling into each other’s arms and promising everlasting love. “Fuck!”

 

She grabbed one of the cups next to her and threw it against the wall.

 

“Fuck!” She kicked a kitchen chair next.

 

Then she opened the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of whiskey.

 

The entire surface of her desk was next. She screamed as she wiped the contents onto the floor, whiskey sloshing over the rim of the bottle.

 

She wanted to take a baseball bat to every part of her apartment.

 

Before she could cause any more damage, the door to her bedroom opened.

 

“Alex?” the other Kara asked, a look of horror plain as day on her face. “What happened? Are you alright?” She scanned the broken shards and the mess on the floor. Then her eyes flicked over Alex and she gasped. “Were you assaulted?”

 

She was across the room in a second, but Alex could barely look at her.

 

“I’m fine,” Alex snapped, tipping back the bottle and swallowing, ignoring the stinging in the back of her throat. She had plenty of practice when it came to drinking. More practice than she’d ever had doing anything else. “Go back to bed.”

 

“What happened with Kara?” the other Kara asked, wrapping Alex’s sweatshirt more tightly around herself. “Did she do this to you?”

 

Alex’s hands shook and the bottle slipped out of her hand the next time she brought it to her mouth, spilling its contents all over Alex’s expensive hardwood floor. The dam of anger and frustration and pain that had been building inside of Alex on the way home finally burst.

 

Before she knew what she was doing, her hands were wrapped around a chair and she’d thrown it across the room. It landed in one of Alex’s display cases, some of Kara’s trophies and pictures falling noisily to the floor as the glass around them shattered.

 

Kara flinched, but she didn’t move away.

 

In fact, Alex was in her arms before she could blink, Kara holding her so tightly Alex almost couldn’t breathe. Her proximity turned all of Alex’s anger into tears.

 

“I love her so much,” Alex sobbed, Kara’s arms the only thing keeping her upright.

 

“I know,” Kara whispered. “She loves you, too.”

 

-

 

Alex woke up to the feeling someone else stroking her hair.

 

When she opened her eyes, she saw Kara’s face hovering over her and it took her a couple of seconds to realize that it was the other Kara. Her own would probably never speak to her again.

 

“How are you feeling?” Kara asked, sitting up and letting go of Alex’s hair.

 

“Like I fucked my sister last night,” Alex shot back, her words too tired to hold any punch. “Like I ruined my life with one stupid mistake. Like my sister is never going to look at me the same again.”

 

Kara sighed.

 

“I tried calling her last night, but she did not pick up her phone,” she said, leaning over to the coffee table and pulling up a platter full of food. Some of it looked strange, and Alex realized it was because it was made up to resemble Kryptonian breakfast items.

 

“She’s probably freaking out,” Alex replied, not feeling particularly hungry. “I’m sorry I scared you last night, and that I threw things around you. It had nothing to do with you.” She rubbed her forehead. “I keep fucking this up.”

 

Kara shook her head.

 

“I knew you posed no threat to me.” She brushed her hand along Alex’s cheek. “But I fear I have made quite a mess of things myself. I pushed myself into your life and when your Kara came back, I refused to stop monopolizing your time.”

 

Sitting up on the bed, Alex took the other Kara’s hand.

 

“You’re trapped in a foreign world by yourself. I’m not going to leave you out in the cold. Kara gets that.” Even saying Kara’s name hurt, and Alex tried not to think about how gorgeous and free Kara’s face had looked after her orgasm.

 

For a moment.

 

“Things have become very cattywampus, I am afraid,” Kara whispered, rubbing her hand on her leg, a decidedly human gesture. “She feels threatened because I already have my Zrhymin and she does not have hers. I understand. When I first met my Alex, she was courting a wonderful woman.”

 

Alex furrowed her brows.

 

“She was?” Momentarily distracted, she pulled the breakfast food towards herself and tried one of the oblong-shaped small breads.

 

“Oh yes,” Kara said, her eyes moving towards the window as she recalled the past. “They had been thinking about marriage when I met my Zrhymin.” Her expression turned sad. “I did not know at first that I was vying for the attention of a woman who was already promised to someone else.”

 

Swallowing down the bite of bread, Alex tried to imagine herself with anyone but Kara.

 

She couldn’t.

 

“What does that word mean, exactly? Zrhymin?” She’d been thinking about it ever since the other Kara had first said it. The general idea of the word seemed to be _wife_ , but Alex knew the Kryptonian word for wife, and it wasn’t this.

 

The other Kara smiled.

 

“It means that she is my heart’s deepest desire,” she said quietly, picking up one of the small breads as well. “It means that she is mine and I am hers. And that no matter how long and hard I may search, I will never find another who is as well suited to me.”

 

A tear trickled down Alex’s cheek, and she roughly wiped it away.

 

“That is how you feel as well,” Kara said, placing her hand over Alex’s. “That is why I thought you were mine the first time I saw you. Because you and your Kara… you are the same as my love and I. There is no shame in that.”

 

Clenching her hands into fists, Alex tried not to feel like a failure.

 

“I was supposed to protect her,” she whispered, another tear falling onto her t-shirt. “I wasn’t supposed to take advantage of her when she was vulnerable and angry.” She wiped at her face again. “I fucking m-mauled her.”

 

Kara put the tray back onto the bedside table and curled herself around Alex, letting her cry on her shoulder.

 

As Alex sobbed - her hand curled into the other Kara’s sweater - she wondered how her own Kara was doing. If she was alone or if she’d sought out help from anyone. Somehow, Alex doubted that Kara was with anybody else.

 

Usually, it would have been Alex providing the comfort.

 

But that couldn’t happen now that Alex herself was the problem.

 

And the thought of Kara suffering by herself… that simply wasn’t acceptable.

 

-

 

Staring at herself in the mirror, Alex looked at the bruising bite mark on the right side of her neck. Right on the big muscle that connected it with her shoulder. She’d put some antiseptic onto it this morning, and it burned and pulsed from the medicine.

 

It also reminded Alex all too much of the feeling of _having_ Kara.

 

Of being inside her. Surrounded by her.

 

Taking a shower hadn’t made her feel better. She didn’t want to wash away the evidence of what they’d done. On some level she wanted to keep that feeling close for as long as possible, but the logical part of her knew that she was dirty and that she needed to scrub it all off.

 

As she brushed her teeth, she tried not to remember Kara’s moans.

 

-

 

“Oh hey, you didn’t have to do all this,” Alex said as she stepped out of her bedroom. She’d expected to find a mess all over her apartment, but instead everything was clean. Practically spotless. There was even a new display case.

 

“It was no trouble at all,” the other Kara said, handing Alex a cup of coffee. “I used the credit card that the DEO issued to me.” She rubbed Alex’s shoulders. “It is the least I could do after you took me in.”

 

Alex gave her a hesitant smile.

 

“It’s my fault you’re here in the first place. I would be a pretty terrible person if I’d just left you out in the cold,” she said, sipping on the coffee and not at all surprised that the other Kara knew just how to make it for her.

 

With a friendly smile, Kara rubbed Alex’s arm.

 

“You have more than made up for that, Alex.”

 

-

 

Rubbing her hands along her legs, Alex wondered if she should knock or not.

 

She sort of didn’t want to, but she knew if she didn’t, she’d regret it for the rest of her life.

 

Ringing the doorbell, Alex stuffed her hands into the front pockets of her jeans and waited for any sort of sign from inside. When nothing happened, Alex rang the doorbell a second time.

 

Still nothing.

 

She tried knocking next.

 

“Kara?” she called, pushing her forehead against the wood. “I know you’re in there and I know you can see me. Winn sent me a text message.” She knocked harder. “Open up the door. You know I’m not above kicking it down.”

 

When there was nothing again, Alex readied herself for a well-placed kick, but before she could move, the door swung open.

 

The first thing Alex thought was that Kara looked terrible.

 

Due to her Kryptonian physiology there were no bags under her eyes, but she looked like she hadn’t brushed her hair at all during the two days she’d been AWOL. And while she wasn’t wearing the same clothes as before, she looked somewhat rumpled.

 

And there was a big stain on one of her thighs, which Alex guessed to be strawberry ice cream.

 

“Go away,” Kara said, giving Alex a fierce glare.

 

For a split second, Alex contemplated leaving.

 

But then common sense kicked in and she pushed past Kara into the apartment.

 

It wasn’t trashed, but the unfinished box of pizza and snowcaps still sat on the coffee table, along with Alex’s open beer bottle.

 

“We need to talk,” Alex said, walking over to the couch and picking up her flat beer. As she moved to pour it down the drain, she noticed the clothes Kara had been wearing during their brief encounter together. They’d been shed next to the couch.

 

“I don’t want to talk,” Kara said, standing by the door with her arms crossed over her chest. “I need some more time. I don’t want to see you right now.” Her nails visibly dug into her sleeves, leaving tears in the material.

 

“Yeah, I figured as much when you ignored my ten calls,” Alex replied caustically, leaving her empty bottle of beer in the sink. “But tough shit.” She picked up the gross pizza and threw it in the trash. “I’m not going to let our relationship fall apart because we had sex.”

 

Kara flinched at her final word.

 

“Can you not…” She released her grip on her sleeves, then walked over to the dining room table and buried her face in her hands.

 

“We had sex,” Alex repeated, picking up the box of snowcaps and pouring those into the trash as well. She was pretty sure they’d gone stale by now. “It happened.” Next, she picked up Kara’s discarded clothing, her hands shaking just a little.

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara said, falling back on old habits.

 

Alex wasn’t sorry.

 

“I wanted it to happen,” she stated matter-of-factly, making Kara look up from her hands. “Not like that. But I’ve been thinking about us being together pretty much since I figured out I was into women.”

 

She walked over to Kara’s bedroom and threw the clothes into the hamper.

 

“It’s fine if you don’t feel the same, and it’s fine if you don’t want anything to happen, but I wanted you to know, because I’m tired of letting this shit rule my life.” She stopped next to Kara and placed her hands on her hips. “I had a talk with the other Kara. Many of them, in fact, and I’m not going to keep this hidden anymore.”

 

Her entire body was filled with unimaginable amounts of anxiety, but Alex couldn’t hold on to this secret by herself anymore. She needed Kara to know.

 

“And I don’t care if you want me as your sister and nothing more, all I care about is what we have right now. Nothing needs to change.” She balled her hands into fists. “But I can’t lose you, Kara. You’ve always been the most important person in my life ever since you came here.”

 

Kara’s eyes were filled with tears.

 

“Things have already changed,” Kara whispered, wiping her hand across her eyes. “I don’t know what to do.” The ache in Alex’s chest was almost unbearable, but Kara wasn’t done. “I’ve already taken so much from you… I can’t take any more.”

 

When Alex tried to touch her, Kara shied away.

 

“The other Kara told me what your life was like there before she met you,” she said, getting up from her chair and wrapping her arms around herself. “You were a doctor with a girlfriend. You didn’t have to hide and repress who you were. You were so happy.”

 

“Kara, that other Alex isn’t me,” Alex said, moving forward and taking Kara’s bicep with her hand. “They’re not us.” She rounded her sister so she could look into Kara’s eyes. “I wouldn’t change a damn thing about us if I could.” Her fingers shook as she wiped away some of Kara’s tears. “You’re my Kara. I don’t want a different one.”

 

Before Alex knew what was happening, Kara was in her arms.

 

“I’m sorry,” she said, again, pressing her face against Alex’s shoulder.

 

“You don’t have to keep saying that.” Alex wrapped her arms tightly around her Kara. “There’s nothing to be sorry about. We’ll figure this out together. It might take us longer than it took the other two, but that doesn’t mean we deserve it any less.”

 

Kara nodded, still sobbing.

 

“I love you,” Kara whispered, pressing kisses at the spot where she’d bitten Alex two days ago. “I didn’t say it back. I’m sorry I didn’t say it back.”

 

Alex held her close.

 

-

 

“Thank you for everything you have done for me,” the other Kara said, bowing low to Winn, Alex, J’onn and Kara, who were all gathered around the portal. “If it is possible, my Zrhymin and I will return to you.”

 

She looked at Alex.

 

“I will miss you most of all, Alex,” she said, walking forward and wrapping Alex up in her arms. Kara was wearing the wide robes again; the ones she’d worn the first time she’d passed through the portal. “Thank you. So much.”

 

“You’re welcome,” Alex replied, holding the other Kara tightly. Not having her around anymore would be weird and difficult, after the two of them had grown so close. “Maybe Kara and I will come through one day to see you, once we’re sure we’ll be able to come back.”

 

“I would like that very much, and I know my Zrhymin would, as well.” The other Kara turned from Alex to Kara. “Take good care of her.” Her voice was soft and Kara smiled a little sadly. Then, suddenly, the two of them were hugging, too.

 

“You have the e-reader and the thumb drive I gave you?” Winn asked, looking like a fussy dad who was carrying his daughter’s school bag around after her. “And the picture and… the sweater…”

 

“I packed everything,” the other Kara said, accepting the bag from Winn before giving him a short hug as well. She’d already said goodbye to the others the day before. “I will miss you all. Please be safe.”

 

Bowing once more, she walking over to the portal.

 

“Come back soon!” Winn called, actual tears gathering in his eyes.

 

The other Kara smiled, gave a last look to Alex… and then… she was gone.

 

“I need a minute,” Winn said, wiping his cheek as he left the room.

 

J’onn, mildly amused, patted both Alex and Kara on the shoulder.

 

“Well, now that that’s over, I think we should go back to worrying about Cadmus,” he said, smiling at them both. “They’ve been suspiciously quiet ever since Lillian Luthor was released from holding.”

 

Nodding at J’onn, Alex gave him a thumbs up.

 

He winked, then he left the room, leaving only Kara and Alex behind.

 

“Wow… now I’m actually sad she’s gone,” Kara said, a thoughtful frown coming over her face. “I guess I should’ve been a little nicer to her, huh?” She swung her hands back and forth. “I should apologize to her when she comes back.”

 

“Yeah,” Alex said, nonchalantly reaching out and catching Kara’s hand.

 

“Let’s go home,” Kara whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is it! I wanted to add more scenes where the other alex came to earth and kicked everybody's asses, but then I was too tired and it would've dragged this out even more. maybe we can revisit these kids at a later date 
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing :)
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	7. the only fang in town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt/Word: "Giggly" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Kara is acting loopy and Alex has a hard time keeping her seated."

“Kara, you need to stay still,” Alex demanded as she tried to push Kara back onto the chair. 

 

Pouting, Kara resisted against her wife’s grip. 

 

“I want to give you a hug,” she whined, wiggling back and forth. “I want to get up on my feet and give you a proper hug.” She wiggled harder, and Alex was almost forced to climb onto the chair with her to keep her contained.

 

Thank god they’d installed those red sunlamps in this room prior to Kara’s first appointment.

 

“You can give me a hug once this is done, okay?” Alex leaned in, trying to distract Kara with kisses. “Just please, you need to have this procedure. We talked about this. Kryptonian maturity and stuff?”

 

Alex was really starting to get too old to keep up with her energetic wife. At thirty-seven years old, Alex was beginning to feel just a little bit worse for wear, while Kara kept bouncing around like the youngin she was.

 

At least in Kryptonian years under Earth’s yellow sun.

 

“More kisses,” Kara demanded, completely ignoring Alex’s words.

 

They really should have waited with the laughing gas until the doctor was actually close to being around. Trying to stifle Kara’s excitement when she was hopped up like this was going to be goddamn difficult.

 

At least the kisses would keep her occupied.

 

“Love you,” Kara mumbled, hands cupping Alex’s cheeks and pecking her on the mouth in rapid succession. “Love you, love you, love you.” She grinned brightly, giggling as she brushed her nose against Alex’s. “My pretty wife.”

 

Alex blushed.

 

“Hmm,” she agreed, kissing Kara’s nose, which only made her giggle harder. “Not as pretty as you.” 

 

Gasping, Kara kissed Alex’s cheeks.

 

“Impossible!” she exclaimed, wrapping her arms around Alex and half-pulling her onto the chair. Even without her Kryptonian strength, she still wasn’t someone to be messed with. “You’re the prettiest! The most beautifullest! The gorgeoustest!”

 

By the time the dentist entered the room, Alex and Kara were making out.

 

-

 

With a book in her hand and a pair of reading glasses on her nose, Alex sat next to Kara’s bedside. After the procedure, Kara had been put to sleep, so her Kryptonian body wouldn’t try to grow back the  _ fangs  _ they’d just removed.

 

While humans often still grew wisdom teeth, Kara had been ‘blessed’ with a different discovery. Earth’s yellow sun had activated some of her more primal beginnings and had grown her some very dangerous fangs. 

 

“Whaf in my mouf?” Kara’s sleepy voice sounded from the bed, making Alex close her book and get to her feet before Kara could do something foolish like poke at her swollen face. “Where am I?”

 

“Hey, baby,” Alex whispered, leaning over her wife and brushing her hand through Kara’s hair. “You’re at the DEO. You just had your fangs removed.” She leaned in to kiss Kara’s forehead. “There’s gauze in your mouth to soak up the blood.”

 

Kara’s eyes widened when she saw Alex’s face.

 

“Who are you?” she asked, her words muffled and sluggish.

 

Alex smiled gently.

 

“I’m Alex,” she said, perfectly aware that the meds were causing her wife to experience some temporary confusion. They just needed to wait long enough for the salve that Alex had worked up to do its thing and keep Kara from regrowing those extra teeth.

 

“Alef,” Kara replied, looking up at Alex with a dreamy expression. “You’re fo pretty.”

 

Chuckling, Alex leaned down to kiss her wife’s forehead again.

 

“I’m gonna marry you,” Kara drawled lazily, turning her face from side to side. Her cheeks resembled those of a hamster and she lifted her hand sluggishly to poke at them. Before she could, Alex caught her fingers and kissed her knuckles gently.

 

“We got married ten years ago,” Alex said, pressing Kara’s hand against her chest. 

 

“Wow,” Kara said, her eyes glassy. “You’re my wife?”

 

“I am,” Alex said, stroking Kara’s hair with her free hand. 

 

“You’re my wife,” Kara repeated to herself, blinking slowly and clearly trying to smile. “Wow.” Her head lolled back into Alex’s direction. “Whaf in my mouf?” 

 

“Gauze,” Alex replied, smoothing her fingers along the back of Kara’s hand. “You just had your Kryptonian fangs pulled out. The paste needs a bit more time to do its thing, then we can get rid of the red sunlight.”

 

“You’re pretty,” Kara said again, closing her eyes. “My wife if fo pretty.” She giggled as best as she could. “My wife. I have a wife.” More giggles. “Alef if my wife.” A little bit of spit dribbled out from between her lips, which Alex quickly wiped away with a napkin. “Whaf in my mouf?”

 

Grinning, Alex sat down on the bed next to Kara.

 

“Gauze, baby,” she said, pulling out her phone and taking a picture so Kara could reminisce about this later. She probably wouldn’t remember any of this once she woke up, which meant Alex needed to make sure that this wouldn’t go undocumented.

 

Lucy also definitely needed to see this.

 

“Where are we?” 

 

Alex grinned.

 

-

 

“Here you go,” Alex said, handing over the box she’d gotten ready once Kara had fallen asleep again. Now that the paste had fully worked, Kara had recovered within a matter of minutes after they’d turned off the red sunlamps. “A terrifyingly impressive pair of ancient Kryptonian fangs.”

 

Giggling, Kara accepted the box and looked inside. The fangs were ridiculously huge and Alex was glad she didn’t have to worry about touching them with her tongue anymore while they made out.

 

“They really were kind of awesome,” Kara said, picking one of them up and turning them over in her hand. Alex had cleaned them thoroughly. “Who knows, maybe I’ll grow awesome horns next or super cool spikes.”

 

“Or a tail,” Alex teased her, leaning forward and pressing a kiss against her wife’s lips. “I’ve got to say, though… You were pretty sweet while you were hopped up on pain meds.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

 

Kara blushed.

 

“Oh Rao, what did I say?” 

 

Laughing, Alex showed her the video she’d taken.

 

Kara’s reaction was priceless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love our dorks.
> 
> all mistakes are my own today
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	8. let me tuck you in

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Drunk Kara"
> 
> Summary: "Kara is just a little bit tipsy and Alex desperately tries to get her home."

“I’m going to fight everybody in this bar,” Kara announced, wobbling slightly as she placed her hands on her hips. “Come on. Who wants to fight?” She slurred her speech and almost fell down from the table she was standing on when she spotted Alex hurrying towards her. “Alex! Alex! Come fight everyone with me!”

 

Waving enthusiastically, Kara would have crashed and burned if Alex hadn’t grabbed her around the waist to keep her upright. 

 

Giggling, Kara placed her hands on Alex’s shoulders before hugging her head close to her body.

 

“I love Alex,” Kara announced loudly to the rest of the bar. “Who else here loves Alex?”

 

A couple of people raised their glass, cheering to Kara’s question.

 

Alex blushed.

 

“Come on, drunk girl, I’m driving you home,” she said, hefting Kara from the table. Over the years, Alex had learned just how to channel her strength into lifting her heavy Kryptonian sister. “You aren’t fighting anybody tonight.”

 

“Aw, why not?” Kara whined, wobbling even now that she was back on the ground. “Can I fight you when we get home? Or maybe I could fight Maggie for breaking your heart. Maggie! Maggie, come over here!”

 

She tried to walk away, but Alex held onto her tightly.

 

“We’re not going to beat up Maggie for not feeling the same,” Alex protested, pulling Kara back into her arms. “Why do you want to fight anyone anyway? You’re supposed to be the good guy.” Kara wiggled around in her grip.

 

“Mon-El said I couldn’t fight everyone, and he’s a dummy,” Kara explained, slumping against Alex’s form and pouting at her. “Do you think I could fight everyone?” Her eyes were sad and big and Alex sighed.

 

“Of course,” she said, pushing Kara to stand on her own again. 

 

“You don’t mean it,” Kara whined, bottom lip wobbling dangerously.

 

“I think you could fight anyone you wanted and you’d win every time,” Alex clarified, trying for a comforting smile. “I’ll always bet on you.” Her facial expression was so sweet that Kara - in all of her drunken feelings - almost teared up.

 

“I love you,” she mumbled, hurling herself further into Alex’s arms and hugging her close, almost knocking Alex on her ass. “Mon-El can suck it.” Sighing contently, Kara snuggled into Alex’s neck. “You smell nice. Can we dance?”

 

Alex’s heart was beating steadily, and her chuckle made Kara want to burrow into her and never let go.

 

“I think it’d be better if you slept this off, kiddo,” she whispered, gently swaying Kara back and forth. “You can’t get a hangover, but it’s probably better than waking up under the bar after a night of binge drinking with your alien friends.”

 

Kara hummed dreamily.

 

“I’d get drunk with you, if you hung out with me more,” she mumbled absentmindedly. “You’re always hanging out with Maggie now. I had to go out and make new friends.” She nosed at Alex’s neck. “You smell nice.”

 

“I know; so you’ve said,” Alex replied, a note of sadness in her voice that Kara’s alcohol-ridden mind couldn’t quite pick up on. “How about we do dance for a bit, hm? Come on. We can show all of those other losers how the Danvers sisters do it.”

 

With an exclamation of joy, Kara pulled out of the embrace and grabbed Alex’s hand, tugging her over to the sparsely populated dance floor. Thankfully, it wasn’t karaoke night, or else Alex might have decided to go home after all.

 

She wasn’t drunk enough to deal with karaoke tonight.

 

Kara’s dancing was uncoordinated and exuberant while she was drunk, and she giggled incessantly as she wrapped her arms around Alex’s neck. Jumping up and down, she made them turn in a circle.

 

Alex laughed.

 

“Kara! Kara, calm down!” she called, not really meaning it when she wrapped her arms around Kara’s waist, picked her up, and turned them both in a circle. 

 

Kara placed a big, wet kiss on her cheek.

 

“Excuse me,” said a sultry female voice from next to them. “May I cut in?”

 

Her eyes were fixed on Alex, and she had an almost predatory look in her eyes, like she knew exactly what she wanted. She was a tall blonde woman and her eyebrow was arched with interest.

 

Before Alex could say anything, Kara had their cheeks pressed together.

 

“Alex is busy right now,” she said petulantly, holding Alex close with both of her arms wrapped around her sister’s neck. “You want to fight? I could totally fight you.” There was a wide pout on her face, and she looked more like she’d hug the woman to death than anything else.

 

The tall blonde woman raised her eyebrow even higher, this time in mild amusement.

 

“Alright, no need to get violent,” the woman said, grinning at Alex. “I get it.”

 

She winked, then she sauntered back over to the bar.

 

Alex followed her with her eyes, wondering if she should maybe get her number - for research purposes - when Kara pressed her hand to her cheek and pulled her head back.

 

“No more hot women watching for you,” Kara replied, her eyes glassy from the amount of alien alcohol she’d consumed. “You’re watching me now.” Her pout grew even bigger as she opened her arms up wide. “Slow dance?”

 

Alex sighed.

 

“Sure,” she said, wrapping both arms around Kara’s waist while Kara put hers on Alex’s upper arms and ducked her head a bit to rest it on Alex’s shoulder. Slowly, they moved to the music from the speakers. “But you really shouldn’t be this rude to my potential dating options.”

 

Snorting, Kara gripped Alex tighter.

 

“You need someone cool,” she mumbled into the shoulder of Alex’s soft sweater, before rubbing her cheek against the material. “Someone who could fight everybody in this bar.” She smiled. “Someone nice and pretty like you.”

 

“And someone who smells nice,” Alex’s teased her, pressing her lips against Kara’s temple.

 

“Yeah,” Kara murmured, closing her eyes and taking in the feel of Alex gently turning them in a circle. If she wasn’t careful, she’d end up making them both float and then where would her secret identity be? But Kara was too drunk to care about any of that. “Thanks for dancing with me.”

 

Alex gently rubbed her back.

 

“Anytime,” she said, leaning her cheek against Kara’s head. “It was getting awkward with Maggie just when I saw you get on the table, so you sort of saved me in a way.” The music changed to a faster beat, but neither Alex nor Kara cared. “Even though I could have done with a little less shouting about how much you love me.”

 

“I’d announce it on national television,” Kara slurred, the warmth of the alcohol making her feel relaxed and comfortable, especially while she was in Alex’s arms. “Everyone needs to know how awesome you are.”

 

Slowly stopping their spinning, Alex gently moved her shoulder under Kara’s cheek.

 

“Can I take you home now?” she asked, squeezing Kara’s waist gently. “I promise I’ll let you have all the junk food you want. We can even grab some on the way.”

 

Kara whimpered.

 

“I don’t want to stop cuddling,” she slurred, holding Alex even tighter. The touch bordered on painful for Alex, because Kara didn’t always have full control over her powers when she was drunk. “Can you give me a piggy-back ride?”

 

With a sigh, Alex nodded.

 

“Fine.” She knew it would be less painful to take Kara home if she caved to some of her drunken demands. And this was one of the tamer ones. Alex had absolutely no problem with making herself look a little bit silly if it got Kara home and into bed. “Hop on, Supergirl.”

 

Squealing, Kara released Alex and waited for her to turn around. 

 

Alex grunted as Kara’s full body weight registered with her muscles and bones.

 

“I’m putting you on a diet,” Alex grumbled as she carefully stepped her way through the other patrons, who looked at them a little strangely. The ones who already knew them sniggered into their drinks. They’d seen Alex use plenty of different tactics to get Kara’s drunken ass home.

 

“I love food,” Kara sighed dreamily, her hands flapping up and down. “Not as much as I love  _ you _ .”

 

“I’m really feeling the love when you strangle me half to death with your grip.” Alex hiked Kara a little higher up, then took a few more steps towards the exit. “Mon-El is going to be fine on his own, right?”

 

Kara made a disinterested noise.

 

“He’ll probably just go home with someone,” she mumbled, her lips almost directly on Alex’s ear, which proved to be quite detrimental when Kara burped right into it.    
  


“Kara!” Alex complained, moving her head away from Kara’s drunkenly giggling mouth. “That’s so fucking gross, ugh.” Someone nice opened the door for them and Alex gave them a relieved smile. “Thanks.”

 

The blue alien winked.

 

“Take good care of her,” they said, gently patting Kara’s shoulder.

 

“Bye, Ford!” Kara slurred, waving at the alien as Alex wobbled out of the bar. Kara seemed to get heavier the longer they walked - or maybe that was just Alex’s legs starting to grow tired from the weight. “See you tomorrow!”

 

Shaking her head, Alex wished she hadn’t parked her car quite so far away.

 

“Ford thinks you should make an honest woman out of me,” Kara said, kissing the side of Alex’s head over and over again. “He thinks we’re  _ girlfriends _ .” She drew out the final words, making it almost sound like she was singing it.

 

The words made Alex sigh.

 

“Lots of people think that,” she mumbled, trying to ignore the faster beating of her heart. 

 

“We’re very affec-- affecti-- cuddly,” Kara said, patting Alex’s cheek with one of her hands. “Thanks for carrying me. You’re the best big sister girlfriend ever.” She giggled some more and rubbed her own cheek on the back of Alex’s head. “I don’t even need a boyfriend or a girlfriend as long as I get to have you.”

 

“Yeah…” Alex whispered, glad when they’d finally reached her car. “You have to get down now, so I can buckle you in.” Getting Kara to let go for good would be the truly hard part in all of this. “If you don’t get down, I can’t buy pizza and we can’t cuddle at home.”

 

It was a solid argument, and Kara weighed her options.

 

Stay on Alex’s warm back, or get down and score a pizza.

 

“Just because I’m getting down now doesn’t mean I don’t love you,” she slurred, patting Alex’s shoulder. Unfortunately, she’d let go of Alex’s neck before putting down her legs. A second later, both Alex and Kara were on the ground.

 

At least Kara was somewhat cushier than the concrete.

 

“You’re going to be the death of me,” Alex complained, sitting up and turning around to look at her giggling sister. Apparently Kara found her own fall pretty hilarious, because she made no move to get up. “We need to go home. I want to sleep.”

 

Reaching out with her hands, Kara wiggled her fingers until Alex took them and helped her sit up. 

 

“My butt is cold and wet thanks to you now,” Alex grumbled, getting to her knees and then her feet. She looked down at herself, relieved to be wearing black so the stains likely wouldn’t show. “The next time you’ll make do with holding my hand.”

 

Smiling brightly, Kara floated to her feet.

 

“You’re cute when you’re cranky,” she whispered, leaning forward and giving Alex a small peck on the nose. Then, she furrowed her brows. “You’re too cute to get turned down. Why would anyone ever turn you down? I wouldn’t turn you down.” 

 

Alex sighed.

 

“Thanks,” she said, taking Kara by the hand and pulling her over to the passenger side. “Now get in the car so I can get some pizza and drive us home.” At this point, Alex was pretty hungry herself, and the food would help soak up Kara’s alcohol.

 

“You’re the best,” Kara said, letting herself get pushed into the passenger seat. “You always take care of me.” Her glasses were a bit crooked, so Alex reached out to fix them for her before leaning over and clicking Kara’s seat belt into place.

 

“That’s my job,” she stated matter-of-factly, kissing Kara’s forehead as she leaned away.

 

“You are the nicest person I’ve ever met.” Kara wrapped her arms around herself. “I wanted to marry you when I was thirteen. Did I ever tell you that?” Her eyes were closed now, so she didn’t see the fond expression on Alex’s face.

 

“Yeah… tons of times…” Alex whispered back, cupping Kara’s cheek for a moment before she caught herself. Once she was in the car, too, she picked a radio station that played pop songs, so Kara could sing along to them on the ride. 

 

“My favorite person…” Kara trailed off, her hand seeking out Alex’s leg for a second before her eyes drooped closed and her head lolled to the side. Alex had no idea how strong the alcohol the aliens drank really was, but if it managed to knock Kara out clean like this, it probably wasn’t made of marshmallows.

 

Driving through the night, Alex stole glances at Kara’s sleeping face to make sure everything was alright with her. While she waited for their pizza to be done, Alex took out Kara’s elaborate braids and slipped the head band onto her own wrist. She usually didn’t give herself a tiny ponytail with her bob, but she always kept a few hair bands on her wrist for Kara.

 

Her sister tended to lose them when she changed into Supergirl.

 

Once they were home, Alex shook Kara’s shoulder and led her into the building, Kara following after her like a supremely adorable zombie puppy. Kara’s hand was warm, and she walked close to Alex, her other hand wrapped loosely around Alex’s arm.

 

She was mumbling incoherently, but Alex didn’t try to make sense of her words. Even though some of it was definitely Kryptonian. Whenever Kara was drunk, her brain liked to switch between the two languages, and Kara thought it was hilarious when some of their friends couldn’t keep up.

 

“You want the pizza now?” Alex asked gently after guiding Kara onto the couch. 

 

Humming her agreement, Kara accepted the pieces of pizza Alex was holding out to her.

 

In a matter of minutes, the food was gone.

 

“Alright, Supergirl, time for you to sleep now,” Alex whispered, helping Kara back onto her feet and leading her into the bedroom. “Let’s see. You definitely can’t sleep in those jeans.” Getting to her knees, Alex unbuckled Kara’s belt buckle and undid the button and zipper. Kara kept her hands on Alex’s shoulders to steady herself. “Lift your legs for me, sweetheart.”

 

This reminded Alex of the several times that Kara had to help her out of her clothes after a night of drinking. Only Alex had been far more depressed and much less giggly and happy.

 

With the jeans off, Alex reached for the pajama pants next to the bed.

 

“Lift your legs just one more time.” 

 

Kara mumbled when she was wearing pants again and she wrapped her arms around Alex once they were standing in front of each other. Alex held her tightly, relishing in the silent moments they could share with one another.

 

“Alex,” Kara murmured quietly. “Alex.”

 

“I’m here,” Alex replied, cupping the back of Kara’s neck. “I’m here. You’re safe. Everything’s okay.” She knew this was the part of the night where Kara tended to get sad. “I’ll take care of you.”

 

Taking a step forward, Alex gently guided her sister onto the bed so she could strip her of her cardigan, her blouse and her bra. They’d undressed many times in front of each other over the years and Alex barely looked anymore.

 

It wasn’t her place.

 

As soon as Kara was in a t-shirt, Alex pulled back the blankets and made Kara lie down.

 

“I’ll be right back,” Alex whispered, kissing Kara’s eyebrow. “I just need to turn off the light.”

 

Kara grumbled the entire time Alex was away. Her hands reached out and she murmured Alex’s name while Alex changed into her own sleepwear. 

 

“I’m here,” Alex repeated, sliding in behind Kara and curling her arm around her waist. “You’re on Earth with me. There’s no one else. You’re safe with me.” She pressed her nose against Kara’s neck while Kara slowly settled back down again. “You’re safe.”

 

Another shuddering breath, and Kara was asleep.

 

Alex breathed out slowly and closed her eyes.

 

She was glad to be home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> drunk Kara is adorable. i love her. hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> thanks to beagles for betaing :)
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr


	9. drop it like a bad habit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Drops" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Alex complains; Kara tries to comfort."
> 
> Rated **M for Mature**.

“Being human kind of sucks,” Alex complained, rubbing at her tired, red eyes. “Even with some of your powers. Ugh, my eyes are totally killing me. How does your heat vision not completely fry your eyes every time you use it?” She rubbed her eyes harder. 

 

“Stop doing that,” Kara commanded, moving behind Alex and pulling her hands away from her face. “You’re not allowed to damage my wife’s beautiful eyes.” She kissed Alex’s temple and rubbed her belly. 

 

“I’m serious,” Alex grumbled, making a blind grab for the eye drops she’d invented for this very purpose. “I’ve been using your powers for a goddamn month and I still want to claw my eyes out every time I use the stupid heat vision. It’s unfair.”

 

She opened her eyes gingerly and dropped the liquid onto them.

 

Immediately, a soothing balm seemed to wash over her.

 

“I am a goddamn genius,” she moaned, closing her eyes once more and leaning back against Kara’s strong body. “Fuck me, those eye drops are the best invention I’ve ever made. I should get a Nobel prize for those eye drops.”

 

Kara giggled.

 

“Too bad no one but you will ever use them, you big genius,” she murmured, kissing along Alex’s neck. “Unless we’re suddenly invaded by as of yet undiscovered hordes of Kryptonians who want to share their souls with humans.”

 

“Sassy,” Alex replied, dragging her nails along the arms wrapped around her body. 

 

“You love it,” Kara whispered, continuing to leave kisses and bites on Alex’s skin. “You shared your soul with me. I can tell when you love something or not.” She chuckled when Alex pouted and crossed her arms over her chest.

 

“You could let me pretend for like a second longer that I have any kind of autonomy left in this relationship now that you’ve made me share your powers,” Alex grumbled, acting seriously mock-offended.

 

“I’m sorry, honey.” Kara kissed her cheek. 

 

“That’s right,” Alex said, putting down the eye drops and turning around in Kara’s arms. “I can really feel your remorse. Just so much groveling happening right there in your chest.” She smoothed her hand along Kara’s chest, over the spot where her heart would be. “Right there.”

 

“Sweetheart, that’s my breast,” Kara gently reminded her, leaning forward and brushing her nose against Alex’s. “Not that I mind, but the kids are right across the hall and it’s your rule that we’re not allowed to have sex while they’re home.”

 

Alex sighed.

 

“They have superhearing.” Alex slipped out of Kara’s arms to walk back into their bedroom. Her muscles were sore from flying around and her feet ached from using the stupid super speed to get home after work. Lois had told her that adjusting to the new powers would be fine, but then again… maybe Alex just wasn’t as tough as the intrepid reporter.

 

“We can be quiet,” Kara reminded her, letting her hands glide over Alex’s butt cheeks while Alex bent over to pick up her pajama pants. 

 

“ _ I _ can,” Alex sassed, moving her hips teasingly when Kara pressed her front against her ass. “You couldn’t keep your mouth shut during sex if your life depended on it. I don’t want my children to be traumatized for life.”

 

With an overly dramatic sigh, Kara dropped onto their bed. 

 

Their house was located on the edge of National City, but up until a month ago, Alex had been the only one who’d been forced to use a car most days. Both Kara and their two kids usually tended to fly or super speed their way into the city.

 

“Can we have a quicky after the kids leave for school?” Kara asked nonchalantly, watching as Alex slipped off her jeans and sweater. At forty-five, Alex looked especially beautiful, and Kara was more than happy that her wife would stay this way for many decades to come. Now that they’d performed the proper Kryptonian bonding ceremony that tied their lives together.

 

The Fortress really was nifty for all sorts of things.

 

“Yeah, sure,” Alex replied absentmindedly, taking off her bra and dropping it into the hamper by the bed. “We just need to make it  _ very  _ quick. I have an early meeting with J’onn.” While Alex got a t-shirt from their closet, Kara watched her wife move.

 

The light from the bedside table covered Alex in a warm, soft glow, highlighting the things Kara loved about her. The soft crinkles around her eyes and mouth. The stretch marks along her flat stomach. The scars on her back. The smattering of grey hairs on her head.

 

She was a goddess. A vision.

 

And she was all Kara’s.

 

“How’s the intergalactic DEO project coming along?” Kara asked, smiling as Alex slipped on an old, faded t-shirt with the House of El crest on the front. “Clark called to tell me that he’s going to be off planet for a while, and that it’s got to do something with J’onn.”

 

Slumping over to the bed, Alex slipped under the covers.

 

“Yeah, the two of them are planning  _ something _ ,” she confirmed, poking at Kara to get under the covers, too, so they could start warming up. Just because Alex and Kara had somewhat merged their souls together during the bonding ceremony so Alex wouldn’t live out her years centuries before Kara, didn’t mean that she was suddenly a furnace, too.

 

“They can’t leave you out of the loop for too long,” Kara murmured, obliging Alex and sliding in beside her. A second later, Alex was in her arms, her head on Kara’s chest. “No one puts the Director of the DEO in a corner.”

 

“Damn right,” Alex grumbled, nuzzling her nose into Kara’s pajamas.

 

Kara, of course, didn’t look a day over thirty. She’d stayed virtually the same age for the last fourteen years, a fact that Alex enjoyed complaining about a lot. 

 

“Maybe I should sell my eye drops,” Alex mused, running her fingers along Kara’s arms again. “There could be multiple uses for them… I just need to figure out what those could be.” The solution had taken quite a few weeks to perfect. “And then we would be millionaires. Billionaires, even.”

 

Chuckling, Kara nuzzled her nose into Alex’s hair.

 

“We don’t need millions of dollars, baby.” Reaching out behind her, Kara shut off the light, coating them both in darkness. The only light in the room now came from the moon outside, but neither Alex nor Kara had any trouble seeing with their enhanced eyesight.

 

“It would be fun to say though,” Alex said, tangling their fingers together and pressing a kiss against her wife’s knuckles. Seventeen years of marriage and Alex wouldn’t have erased a single second of it. “Alex and Kara Danvers, millionaire playgirls and devastatingly handsome scientists.”

 

“I’m a journalist,” Kara said, voice dead-pan. “And we were also never playgirls. Not in this life.”

 

Snorting, Alex shrugged.

 

“It’s the thought that counts,” she said, leaning up on her elbow so she could look down at Kara. “You don’t think my eye drops could make a lot of money? They could improve the lives of millions of people.”

 

“I will support you in whatever business venture you want to launch, honey,” Kara promised, leaning up and kissing Alex thoroughly. “I’ll be first in line to get those  _ Danvers Drops _ .” Her hands slid down Alex’s sides and into her pajama pants.

 

“I’ll give you a family discount,” Alex husked, kissing Kara back with equal fervor. “Now get your hands out of my pants; I’m not sleeping with you while our kids are down the hall.” There was no way Alex would do that to them.

 

“You said  _ I  _ can’t keep quiet. But we both know you can be silent as a mouse,” Kara teased, rolling them over so Alex was on her back. “Which means I could totally eat you out right now and no one would ever know, because you have such  _ excellent  _ self control.”

 

“You are incorrigible,” Alex whimpered, closing her eyes as Kara started kissing down her body. “If you want me to return the favor, you’re going to have to wait until tomorrow.” Her heart was already beating faster and Alex knew her wife would be able to feel it.

 

“I don’t mind,” Kara replied, sliding down Alex’s pajama pants and panties in one swift motion so she could settle in between her wife’s thighs. “I just want to make you feel good. You’ve been stressing yourself out too much about Vasquez.” 

 

Ever since Lucy had been elected president, Vasquez had been left in charge of the desert base.

 

Alex breathed shakily as Kara licked at her clit.

  
“I just want them to do a good job,” Alex whispered, pressing her hands against her eyes while Kara sucked and nipped at her. After years of sex, Kara knew just how to touch her. Knew just how to get her off. “I know they can handle it.”

 

“This is a worry free zone right now,” Kara mumbled in between well-placed sucks. “Just lie back and enjoy yourself for a second. No DEO, no work, no CatCo and Danvers, no nothing. Just you and me.”

 

When Alex came - quick and hard - her body turned boneless and her stress melted away. At least for a moment. As soon as she’d get up the following day, she’d be back to the daily grind. She loved working, but sometimes she just needed a break.

 

Kara felt the same about her job as the new CEO of CatCo and Danvers.

 

“I love you,” Alex panted, quivering when Kara kissed her wetness one last time before sliding her panties and pajama pants back on. “I hope that was as good for you as it was for me, because whew. It was really good.”

 

Giggling, Kara slipped up and shared Alex’s arousal in between kisses.

 

“I love you, too,” she whispered, stroking her hands through Alex’s hair. 

 

For a moment, they simply basked in the moment together, content in the knowledge that they had one another and that whatever the world would throw at them next, they would be fine. For a moment, there was nothing but gentle silence.

 

Smiling, Kara rested her head on Alex’s chest and closed her eyes.

 

She was almost asleep, when…

 

“I swear, those damn eye drops need to be good for  _ something _ . I’m not going to rest until I can use them for something else by the time my body’s gotten used to the powers,” Alex grumbled, her arms holding on tightly to Kara. “Maybe they could work on regular human eyes… maybe I should get Winn to test them for me… Actually, you know what, I’m going to call him right now.”

 

By the time Alex had her phone in her hand, Kara was peacefully, blissfully asleep.

  
Soon enough, Winn was not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lee and I talked about how there are no long-term wlw or older wlw in shows and fanfics, so I figured why not give a small glimpse into their lives when they're a bit older. hope you enjoyed!
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for beating :))
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	10. crash and burn and then return again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt/Word: "Concerned" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Alex's life flashes before her eyes. Kara's just wondering where this hot chick came from."

Alex’s life was flashing before her eyes.

 

As she fell through the air, she tried not to imagine her mother’s disapproving face the day Alex had told her she was leaving her university in Los Angeles to study something else in National City instead. 

 

While she hurtled towards an open window, she heard her mother’s voice, telling her she’d always regret not going through with her degree and that she would die in the gutter like all the other quitters.

 

_ Well, at least this isn’t a gutter _ , Alex thought, just as she crashed onto a hardwood floor. Her descent was so steep and fucked up that she didn’t have time tuck and roll to minimize the force of the impact, and the feeling of pain shooting up her ankle told her that she likely wouldn’t be able to parkour for quite a while.

 

She barely even had time to register that she wasn’t the only person who had hit the floor during her little maneuver, because she was simply glad she hadn’t ended up as a pancake on the pavement below.

 

She’d jumped that very ledge dozens of times.

 

“Fuck, shit, ugh,” Alex grumbled as she tried to get up. Her right ankle was screaming at her to stay on the ground, but she forced herself to limp over to the closest wall. Next, she checked the GoPro attached to her forearm. “No, come on,  _ work _ .” 

 

The screen had a crack.

 

“Fuck,” Alex mumbled again, only now realizing that she wasn’t alone.

 

-

 

It was a beautiful summer’s day and Kara smiled as she moved her paintbrush across the canvas in front of her. She was trying to finish a project for her class on still life painting, and she’d arranged a couple of fruits in a bowl. 

 

She was going for a pretty traditional take on the material.

 

Thankfully, her roommate Lucy had left to hang out with her boyfriend, so Kara had all the time in the world to paint in front of the window without her friend complaining about the noise. 

 

What she hadn’t expected was to be knocked over, or for her easel to crash to the floor and her palette to fly through the air. The impact knocked the wind from her lungs and when her elbow hit the ground, Kara gasped with pain.

 

It took her a couple of seconds to realize that she hadn’t been hit by a large bird.

 

The woman who had crashed  _ through her window  _ on the third floor was limping over to the wall, cursing quietly as she checked her camera for damage. She was wearing a pair of faded, ripped jeans and a black t-shirt with the sleeves cut off. Her right arm was tattooed with what looked to be complex formulae.

 

Her face was half-obscured by her dark brown hair, but Kara’s eyes kept returning to those biceps anyway. The woman’s forearms flexed when she clenched her hands into fists, obviously aggravated about the broken state of her camera.

 

She looked incredibly fit.

 

When the woman looked up and spotted Kara, her expression turned from aggravation to worry in less than a second. Apparently she hadn’t been aware that she’d crashed right into Kara and her work. 

 

“Shit, sorry,” the woman said, starting forward before hissing. She was favoring her right leg and Kara scrambled to her feet immediately. “I’m so sorry for crashing in here. I was trying to cross roofs and I slipped on the edge and lost my momentum. I’ll pay for whatever I damaged.”

 

Meanwhile, Kara was more concerned about the handsome stranger’s well-being.

 

“Let me drive you to the hospital; it looks like you hurt your ankle,” she said, taking a step forward. Kara herself was wearing a ratty old button-up with flecks of paint all over it, and a pair of shorts, but Kara couldn’t care about that right now. Not when this woman was hurt.

 

“Ah, shit, I think I broke your easel,” the woman said, running a hand through her hair. The action caused her t-shirt to ride up, revealing a sliver of soft creamy skin and the teasing hint of rock-hard abdominal muscles. “I swear, I’m going to pay for any property damage I caused.”

 

Kara barely even cared about the painting and the easel. 

 

“Come on, I’ll drive you,” she said again, walking over to the hot woman. “You can wrap your arm around my shoulders. I’ll help you.” There was a streak of red paint along the woman’s right leg, but Kara didn’t care about that as she indicated that the woman should lift up her arm.

 

The tattoo looked even more fascinating up close.

 

“I’m sorry,” the woman said again, finally wrapping her arm around Kara’s shoulders. “I don’t know how that could have happened. I’ve never  _ not  _ made a jump before.” She grimaced when she tried to put weight on her right foot again.

 

“It’s alright,” Kara promised, slowly helping the stranger through her living room. “I’m Kara, by the way. You should be glad my roommate isn’t here right now. She probably would’ve drop-kicked you right back out of the window.”

 

Kara was pretty sure she was babbling.

 

Incredibly hot and fit people did funny things to her.

 

“I’m Alex,” the woman replied. Her skin felt warm against Kara’s shirt and the muscles under Kara’s hands were firm. At this point, Kara was almost grateful to the world for dropping Alex through her window.

 

Even though she was plenty concerned.

 

-

 

The emergency room was packed - as expected.

 

Kara deposited Alex in a chair before walking up to the front desk so they could sign in. After that was done, Kara sat down next to Alex and folded her hands in her lap after adjusting her glasses.

 

“Were you going anywhere specific?” Kara asked, just trying to make conversation. She was sitting to Alex’s left, which left Kara precious few opportunities to study Alex’s tattoo any further. Not that looking at the side of her beautifully designed face was a punishment.

 

“No,” Alex replied, sliding down in her chair as she filled out the form Kara had handed to her. “I was just trying to make a cool new video for my YouTube channel. I do parkour videos once a week through National City.”

 

Kara nodded.

 

“That sounds cool,” she said, rubbing her left thigh. 

 

“Yeah… I’m sorry I destroyed your art project,” Alex mumbled, finishing up the form. “I’ll also totally pay you back for the time that it took to paint that. It looked awesome… Are you an art student?”

 

Blushing, Kara nodded shyly.

 

“It really wasn’t that great. I don’t really care for still life painting and I didn’t put a lot of effort into it.” She smiled a little hesitantly. “But I wouldn’t say no if you wanted to replace my easel. I think one of the legs broke off.”

 

Fiddling with the bottom of her t-shirt (and thereby showing off more of her flat stomach), Alex seemed all too determined to make good on her promise. 

 

“I’ll make sure you get enough money to replace everything.” 

 

-

 

The wait in the emergency room took over an hour, and the orderlies and nurses freaked out a bit when they saw the red paint. Still, all in all it hadn’t been Kara’s worst visit to the hospital. At least she’d had someone cool and nice and interesting to talk to.

 

Once they’d gotten over their initial awkwardness, Kara had found Alex to be very funny and charming. And she was intrigued to hear that Alex was actually studying at the same university as she was.

 

Kara had stayed in the waiting room while Alex had gotten patched up.

 

She couldn’t just leave her out to dry, not now that they’d sort of become friends. Even though Kara had rarely had a friend that she wanted to take out to dinner so much after one good conversation.

 

-

 

“That’s where I live. Right there,” Alex said, pointing at one of the apartment buildings to Kara’s right. “Thanks for all of your help. You have my number, so just text me how much money that easel is and I’ll wire it to you. And if I don’t, you have my contact info, so you can sic your lawyer on me.”

 

Kara giggled.

 

“Alright,” she said, blushing a little when Alex leaned forward to give her a kiss on the cheek. “Maybe we’ll see each other around campus.” It was a desperate last-ditch effort to get Alex to ask her to hang out.

 

“For sure,” Alex replied, apparently oblivious to Kara’s silent urging. “I’ll see you around, Kara.”

 

She winked, then she limped away, Kara watching after her with a feeling that she’d missed out on something great. Alex seemed like the kind of person that would only enrich her life, and even though Kara had her number and contact info… she wasn’t sure if she would use it beyond the easel replacement.

 

Despite what her friends thought of her, Kara wasn’t always the bravest person when it came to her dating life. She’d wanted to date James, but then her roommate Lucy - completely oblivious to Kara’s affections - had snatched him up before Kara had gotten up the nerve to ask him out.

 

She didn’t want that to happen again, but she also had no idea if Alex was even single - or a lesbian, for that matter. Sure, she  _ looked  _ like a lesbian, but Kara didn’t like to get her hopes up about such things.

 

Not since Siobhan Smythe had turned her down in high school.

 

No way was Kara making that mistake again.

 

-

 

After about eight days, Alex’s grade one sprain felt pretty much healed. She’d done a few simple parkour moves and hadn’t had too much trouble. Still, she waited for a day longer before attempting the crazy jump she’d done only once (by accident).

 

Everything was ready.

 

She’d planned this from the moment she’d left Kara’s car to head into her apartment. Alex didn’t have the best track record with girlfriends (the only one she still talked to was Maggie), but she’d been instantly smitten with Kara.

 

Especially once Alex had seen her smile and fiddle nervously with her glasses.

 

Alex had been trying to act cool and suave, but she didn’t feel like she’d really pulled it off. Instead, she’d felt dopey as she’d talked to Kara about her tattoo and what it meant to her. And she still couldn’t believe she’d broken out into goosebumps when Kara had asked to touch her tattoo.

 

Shaking her head, Alex readied herself.

 

This time her life didn’t flash before her eyes when she jumped.

 

Instead, she knew exactly where and how she would land, and she tucked and rolled perfectly when she hit the ground inside Kara’s apartment. To Alex’s great relief, Kara was sitting on her couch this time.

 

The new easel looked pretty snazzy as well.

 

Kara shrieked and went into a fighting stance when she heard the crash. She’d told Alex that she regularly practiced Krav Maga at a local gym, and Alex had been pretty turned on by that. Women who could beat her up were one of her great weaknesses.

 

“It’s just me,” Alex said as she jumped back onto her feet. “Sorry, I didn’t know your exact apartment number, so I just figured I’d get in the same way I came before. Only less brutally and with more precision.”

 

For a second, Kara simply stared at her. 

 

Then, she smiled.

 

“Hey,” she said, relaxing and lowering her hands. “I was wondering if I’d see you again. How’s your ankle? I’m not sure you should be jumping through windows with that sprain. It looked pretty bad.”

 

Shrugging, Alex slipped off her backpack.

 

“I’ve had worse. It’s no big deal.” She moved her right foot from side to side. “See? Good as new.” She crouched down. “I actually brought you something. You know, to say thank you for taking me to the emergency room.”

 

Kara blushed.

 

“You don’t have to do that. It wasn’t a problem,” she said, biting her bottom lip and looking supremely adorable with her hair piled on top of her head and those glasses slipping down her nose. Alex was goddamn weak for all of it.

 

Without responding, Alex pulled out a bouquet of flowers and a card.

 

“They didn’t have ‘I’m sorry I crashed through your window’ cards at Walmart, so I had to make one myself,” she said, handing both over to Kara. Now that she was actually here, she felt just a bit embarrassed about the whole thing. “I’m not as big of an artist as you, but I think I did pretty well.”

 

Taking a whiff of the flowers, Kara smiled happily and held the bouquet tightly to herself while she opened up the envelope Alex had also handed to her. She laughed when she saw the card.

 

“That’s truly something special,” she said, a glint of something unidentifiable in her eyes.

 

The GoPro had been broken, but Alex had managed to get out the memory chip in one piece. Her facial expression during the fall looked ridiculous, and Alex wasn’t above showing Kara what had happened, just because it made her look a little silly.

 

“I figured you could frame it and put it right there above the television,” Alex joked, pointing at the stretch of wall she meant. “I also wrote you a note, but if you don’t want anything to do with that, you can just ignore that part and accept my deepest gratitude without any weird baggage.”

 

Kara lifted one eyebrow.

 

“Now I’m curious,” she said, flipping open the card and reading it over. With every word, her cheeks seemed to grow redder. “Not as creative as that picture up front, I’ve got to say.” Kara’s voice was just a bit breathless.

 

“I tried to get my point across as succinctly as possible. One of my professors told me I blab too much in my research papers,” Alex whispered, rubbing the back of her neck. “But yeah, if you don’t want to mention that ever again, that’s cool with me and I’ll just get back out the way I came.”

 

For just a moment, Kara looked at her. Then, she turned around and drew her index finger through the red paint on her palette. 

 

When she showed Alex the card, Alex’s cheeks almost hurt from smiling.

 

Underneath the question  _ Will you crash into a date with me _ , Kara had drawn a small love heart.

 

It sat right next to the word  _ Yes _ .

 

-

 

The picture on the card did not end up above the television.

  
Instead, Kara framed it and placed it on her bedside table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another conversation with RaneJizzoli that I turned into a fanfic :D hope you enjoyed!
> 
> all mistakes are my own today
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	11. let it snow [Part 1]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Floss" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Kara's car breaks down during a snowstorm."

“Thanks for letting Ms. Grant know I won’t be back for a couple more hours, Eve,” Kara said into the hands-free headset of her car. “The interview ran a little longer than I anticipated and I wanted to get as much out of the guys as I could. I think Ms. Grant is going to be very happy with the results.”

 

Eve hummed happily.

 

“That’s great, Kara,” she replied. “Mike wants you to know that your mother called to confirm your reservations for Christmas dinner.” Eve sounded almost whimsical as she spoke of Kara’s adopted little brother.

 

“You don’t have to keep telling me stuff for him, Evie,” Kara reprimanded her friend. “He can call me himself, if he wants me to know that mom called.” She rolled her eyes. Mike had been ‘working’ at CatCo Worldwide Media for a little under a month now. Kara still didn’t believe he actually ever did any of the work himself.

 

“I know,” Eve sighed. “He’s just so cute.”

 

“I don’t see it,” Kara said truthfully. “Maybe it’s because I saw him when he was a screaming toddler.”

 

Eve chuckled.

 

“Maybe,” she said. Kara heard shouting from her end. “Sorry, Kara, I have to go. Ms. Grant needs me to get her another salad. I’ll talk to you later!” Before Kara could reply, Eve had hung up the phone. 

 

Kara wasn’t angry with her. She knew from personal experience that making Ms. Grant wait for anything could result in some serious punishment and verbal lashing. All in all, Kara was very glad she didn’t have to be an assistant anymore.

 

Even though she sometimes missed not having to chase stories.

 

Right now, a day before Christmas, she could have done without driving out to bumfudge nowhere to talk to a source about the serious corruption of National City’s politicians and their involvement in small town life all across the country. And it had been snowing since the afternoon, too. Driving in the snow was one of Kara’s serious pet peeves.

 

She was just about to call Lucy for an update when her car sputtered.

 

She waited, but when nothing else happened she went back to focusing on her driving. 

 

“Call Lucy,” she enunciated clearly. Kara still needed a good idea for what to give her Aunt Astra for Christmas. Even though it was seriously last minute, Kara had no idea what Astra might need. But since her aunt and Lucy worked at the local military base together, Kara knew her friend would be able to help.

 

It rang for several seconds, then the recording of Lucy’s voicemail kicked in.

 

Kara left her a message about Astra and asked her friend to get back to her. She was likely already out and about with her spouse. Vasquez and Lucy tended to go to dinner most Wednesday nights.

 

Kara was playing with the idea of calling her mom about the Christmas dinner when her car started making loud noises again. They almost startled Kara enough to hit the brakes.

 

A second later, however, hitting the brakes wasn’t necessary, because her car didn’t just sputter. 

 

It died, leaving her stranded in the middle of the goddamn road during a snowstorm in a tiny town of less than 15,000 people. 

 

“Dang it,” Kara mumbled to herself, flicking on her car’s warning lights. She didn’t need to be rear-ended, too. She tried to restart the engine, but nothing happened. She tried again. Nothing. She tried for a third-- nothing. “Ugh, frigging fish sticks.”

 

And she needed to pee.

 

This was just fantastic.

 

Resting her head against the steering wheel, Kara breathed in and out slowly for a couple of seconds. This was really happening and she needed to deal with it like a proper adult. Like the hot shot reporter from National City she really was.

 

Picking up her phone, Kara pulled up her search engine and typed in the name of the town, plus the word  _ mechanic _ . She could’ve wept for joy when she saw that the only mechanic in town still had a small  _ open now _ marker next to their name.

 

“All is not lost,” Kara whispered to herself, copy-pasting the number of the mechanic and pressing the call button. As she waited for the call to connect, she watched the snowflakes land on the hood of her car, slowly spelling out her impending doom if she didn’t get this sorted out in time.

 

“ _ Danvers Auto Shop _ here. This is Alex Danvers speaking, how may I help you?” said a female voice on the other side of the receiver. She sounded nice, but Kara didn’t have time to dwell on that.

 

“Yes, hi, this is Kara El. My car broke down in the middle of the road,” Kara replied, digging the nails of her right hand into her pants. “Can you come and pick me up and then maybe fix my car? I’m on a tight schedule.”

 

“Can you tell me where you are, ma’am?” Alex Danvers replied, sounding much more collected than Kara could have ever hoped to be in her entire life. “I can drive out and pick you up with my tow truck.”

 

Kara almost cried with relief.

 

“Thank you,” she said, knowing she sounded just as desperate as she felt. “I’m on Krypton Street in front of the hair salon. Um, one of the hair salons. I don’t know how many you have. I’ve never actually been here before.”

 

“I know where you are, ma’am. I’ll be there in just a couple of minutes,” Alex promised, her reassuring tone making Kara relax ever so slightly. Maybe things would be alright after all. Maybe she’d even be able to go home tonight, if it all went well.

 

“Thank you,” Kara said again, before hanging up the call. Once she was back in silence again, she sort of wished she’d stayed on the phone with the mechanic. Or maybe the woman was just one of the people who worked at the auto shop. It didn’t matter to Kara either way. The woman’s voice had been soothing, but Kara was alone again and left to her worries.

 

If her car couldn’t be fixed quickly, Kara would have to find another way home.

 

Thankfully, the woman had been speaking the truth, because a couple of minutes later her tow truck passed Kara before halting at the side of the road in front of her. The figure who stepped from the truck was too obscured by the snow and settling darkness to properly distinguish.

 

Before she’d made it all the way to Kara’s car, Kara stepped out, wrapping her arms around herself. She wasn’t wearing a scarf, a hat or a pair of gloves. In fact, she wasn’t even wearing a jacket. She’d driven up North all the way from National City, but she hadn’t anticipated that she’d get caught up in a snowstorm.

 

“Are you Ms. El?” the figure called out, slowly coming into view. 

 

“Yes,” Kara replied, shivering in the cold wind and snow. Her heels weren’t doing her any favors either. She was truly having a terrible time. “I need my car. Can you please help me?” 

 

When the figure stepped closer, Kara realized that the woman was wearing a big jacket and a woolen cap. Her jeans were stained and her hands were stuffed into big, heavy gloves. She seemed to be well-acquainted with the weather, at least.

 

“You must be freezing,” the woman said, her friendly features making Kara feel relieved that the mechanic in town seemed to someone nice instead of sleazy. Kara had seen plenty of gross mechanics on television. “Sit in my truck up front on the passenger seat. I’m running the heater.”

 

Then, she did something even nicer (and crazier).

 

She unzipped her jacket, slipped it off, and handed it over. The gesture revealed a heavy, woolen sweater with an ugly Christmas design involving something  _ Star Wars _ related. Kara stared at her.

 

“What about you?” she asked, holding the jacket in her shivering hands.

 

“This won’t take long,” the woman said confidently, moving her hands to indicate that Kara should put on the jacket. “I promise it’s clean. I don’t wear it around the garage.” Her smile made Kara blush.

 

Still feeling slightly reluctant, Kara slipped her arms into the jacket and zipped it all the way up. It was gloriously warm and she retracted her hands into the sleeves. With another nod from the woman - Alex Danvers - Kara handed over her car keys and stalked over to the passenger side of the truck.

 

Once she was inside, she let out a small breath, her glasses fogging up in the sudden warmth. The jacket smelled nice, too. It was fluffy and comfortable and when Kara stuck her nose inside the collar, the scent calmed her immediately.

 

She’d almost closed her eyes by the time Alex reentered her tow truck.

 

“Did you notice anything before your car died?” she asked as she buckled herself in and put her car into gear. The windshield wiper was getting a right workout, too. Never in a million years had Kara anticipated the intense snowfall this tiny town was currently experiencing.

 

“It sputtered once, but everything seemed fine, and then a couple of minutes later it sputtered again and died. I tried to restart it a couple of times, but nothing happened.” Kara didn’t want to slip her nose free from the warm collar to talk, but she sort of felt like she had to. Muffled talking wasn’t generally conducive to finding out problems. “Do you know what could be wrong with it?”

 

Alex shrugged and gave her a small smile.

 

“I have a couple of ideas,” she said, taking a right turn and then another. “You said you really need your car and I haven’t seen you around here before. Are you from far away or is there anyone who could pick you up?”

 

Sighing, Kara slipped down in the passenger seat.

 

“I drove up here from National City this morning,” she confessed, closing her eyes in annoyance. “I came here to get a story for our magazine and I was on my way back and then… tragedy.”

 

Alex made a concerned noise.

 

“All the way from Cali, huh? Yeah, I guess the whole picking you up and dropping you back off thing isn’t going to work very well in that case.” She thought for a second. “There’s an airport a couple of cities over, but I don’t know how easy it would be to get there if the problem with your car isn’t going to be an easy fix.”

 

This conversation didn’t make Kara feel any better.

 

“A day before Christmas,” she whined, not in the least bit self-conscious that she was acting like a fool around this woman. She probably wouldn’t see her again anyway after her car was done. “Stuff like this only ever happens to me.”

 

Alex chuckled.

 

“You’d be surprised how many people I’ve heard that from,” she said, waiting in front of a red light. The sign out front for the  _ Danvers Auto Shop _ was already visible from where they were standing. “You could take a bus to the airport, but it would take a while for you to get there.”

 

“You’re not exactly being very positive,” Kara mumbled, stuffing her nose back into the collar. At least Alex smelled nice, even if she hadn’t yet mastered the art of comforting someone who was in a shit situation.

 

“I’m sorry,” Alex replied, stopping the truck in front of the garage. “I’m only trying to tell you how it is around here without a car. Which is why I hope that yours will be an easy fix, because if it needs a new part to be replaced, it could take a couple of days.”

 

“My mom is going to kill me if I miss Christmas with my family,” Kara groaned, unbuckling herself and getting out of the truck. She was very glad for the jacket that Alex had lent to her. Kara was a hot-blooded person, but even she had to buckle under the force of nature sometimes. “And my brother is going to ascend to the position of favorite child.”

 

She heard Alex’s chuckle before she saw her face.

 

“Let me get this baby inside and have a look. You can wonder how and when your life is going to end after that,” she said, her smile almost sweet enough to make Kara forget her troubles for a second. In the light from the garage, Alex’s features looked much softer.

 

_ I’m screwed _ , Kara thought.

 

-

 

Once the car was inside, Alex closed the door of the garage behind herself and cranked up the heater. Kara still chose to stay wrapped in the comfortable jacket. She tried not to gawk when Alex took off her cap to reveal gorgeous brunette hair cut in the shape of a bob. Her hands looked equally gorgeous, and when she slipped off the jumper to reveal a tight black t-shirt, Kara wondered if she’d accidentally taken a wrong turn and gone to heaven.

 

_ I’m too bisexual for this _ . Kara watched as Alex pulled up the hood, her bicep muscles flexing perfectly. For a second, Kara entertained the thought that it had been the divine wish of the gods to send her to this gorgeous woman.

 

Then she squashed the idea.

 

“How about you? Do you have any plans for Christmas?” Kara asked casually, pulling up a small stool on casters and sitting down next to Alex. It probably wasn’t any of her business, but she wanted to make some idle conversation to distract her from how hot this woman looked and how utterly Kara lacked game of any kind.

 

Shrugging, Alex leaned over the motor.

 

“My parents are on a Christmas vacation to France, my best friend is spending her first Christmas with her new girlfriend, and my other friends all have their own stuff to do.” She shrugged again. “I’m probably just going to pop a frozen pizza in the oven and rewatch whatever old Christmas movie is on the air.”

 

Kara frowned.

 

“That sounds…” She barely had any idea how to finish the sentence.

 

“Pretty boring and sad, I agree,” Alex said casually, giving Kara a small smile. “It’s fine, though. It’s my own fault I’m single and friendless on Christmas while my parents are having a good time.”

 

The word  _ single  _ reverberated in Kara’s mind and she stuffed her nose into the collar of Alex’s jacket again. She had a feeling she was being somewhat creepy, but she couldn’t help herself. Kara was also single. Desperately single. And she had been for years at this point. She was thirty-five and she still didn’t have anyone she wanted to settle down with.

 

Alex didn’t seem to be much older than her.

 

“If I don’t make it back to National City in time, we can spend our lonely Christmases together,” Kara mumbled mostly to herself, moving herself back and forth on the small stool. When she looked up, she saw that Alex was grinning.

 

“That sounds like a great idea, actually,” she said, giving Kara a warm smile. “Because I just checked this thing, and it looks like this right here needs to be replaced.” She held up a small, rectangular pipe-like piece of metal. “And I can guarantee you that it’s going to take until at least the 27th until it’s here.”

 

Groaning, Kara buried her head in her hands.

 

“Great,” she mumbled, sliding her hands through her hair. “I’m going to have to call my mom and my friends and it’s all going to be a gigantic mess.” The only silver lining she could see was that she’d gotten to hang out with a pretty cool woman at least. “Do you know any good hotels in the area?”

 

Alex walked over to one of her work benches and placed the small metal object down before wiping her hands relatively clean on a rag. She seemed to be contemplating Kara’s question. The fact that no hotel appeared to spring to her mind immediately made Kara more than a little anxious.

 

“You can stay at my place,” she finally offered, looking nervous and supremely adorable at the same time. “I know we don’t really know each other, but you seem like you could use a friendly face and a helping hand.”

 

Kara could have cried with joy. Again.

 

“You are so cool,” she said, getting up from the stool. “I would totally give you a hug right now if I didn’t want your nice jacket to get ruined.” She felt more than a little gratified when Alex laughed.

 

It was a good laugh.

 

-

 

“You can take my bed; I fall asleep on the couch all the time,” Alex offered as she led Kara into her apartment. Kara had cleared out what little stuff she’d had in her car and then Alex had driven them both over. The shop had been about to be closed anyway, since six PM was rapidly approaching.

 

“I don’t want to make things any more inconvenient for you,” Kara said, shutting the door behind herself and following Alex through the hallway and into the living room. The walls were sparsely decorated, but Kara still got a very lived-in feeling from the place. Mainly because every inch of it seemed to be covered in stacks or piles of paper.

 

“Sorry,” Alex said, blushing instantly. “I wasn’t expecting company. I’m working on a theory right now. Let me just get this out of the way.” She grabbed a couple of the stacks and moved them over to another room while Kara stood awkwardly next to the couch. 

 

“What kind of theory?” she asked as Alex returned, only to pick up more stacks of paper.

 

“Oh, I’m trying to create a serum that stimulates blood regeneration,” Alex said almost too casually, giving Kara a small glance out of the corner of her eye. “Being a mechanic is actually just a side gig I do for my dad when he’s not in town. I’m actually a bio-engineer.”

 

Kara blinked.

 

“Wow,” she said, unsure of what to say. “That’s really cool.”

 

Alex shrugged.

 

“You want to order some food?” she asked, clearly embarrassed to be revealing her actual job. Maybe she didn’t want to seem like a snob in front of Kara, or like she’d been trying to deceive her. “We have a pretty decent selection, believe it or not.”

 

Nodding, Kara gave her a small, reassuring smile. “I’m famished.” 

 

Alex’s smile was one of relief.

 

-

 

“I can’t thank you enough,” Kara said, looking down at the comfortable borrowed clothing she was wearing. The pajamas Alex had given to her were incredibly soft and they too smelled wonderful. “For letting me stay here and taking my mind off this shitty situation.”

 

Alex smiled and shrugged.

 

“You’re welcome,” she said, leaning against the doorjamb to her bedroom. She’d changed into a pair of sweatpants and a different t-shirt. She still looked sinfully attractive and Kara knew she wouldn’t get out of this trip unscathed.

 

Their evening together had been terrific. Kara had met few people in her life that she clicked with so effortlessly. Lucy had certainly been one of them. James as well. But there was something very different about what Kara wanted to do with Alex.

 

“I have spare toothbrushes in the cabinet next to the sink. There’s also floss in there,” Alex continued, crossing her arms over her chest. Once again Kara was drawn to those biceps. Goddamn but she was weak. “If you need anything else, just let me know.”

 

“Thanks,” Kara husked, trying to keep herself in check. “Goodnight.”

 

Alex had already completed her evening routine.

 

“Goodnight, Kara,” Alex responded, giving Kara a sweet smile. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

 

When Kara closed the door to the bedroom, she let out a low breath and pressed her forehead against the wood. She would call her mother with the news tomorrow. She’d also call Lucy and ask her to get a gift for Astra.

 

And then she’d call Ms. Grant.

 

“What a nightmare,” she mumbled to herself. As she trudged over to the ensuite bathroom, she tried to see the positive. She wasn’t staying in a grungy hotel in a small town; she’d been invited to stay at an attractive woman’s apartment. She was still alive. Her car wouldn’t need to be completely revamped, and she’d made Alex Danvers’ acquaintance.

 

Opening the cabinet next to the sink, Kara pulled out the floss first. 

 

Tomorrow she’d have plenty of time to worry.

  
Tonight, she just wanted to think about her knight with the tow truck steed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you may or may not not have guessed, this little ficlet part was based on the first prompt from this post: http://bedannibal-lectaurier.tumblr.com/post/132753673997/i-just-want-hallmark-christmas-movies-but-with . Hallmark lesbian christmas movies! Tomorrow's chapter will veer off from that :)) I hope you enjoyed!
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for checking my 3am work
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	12. let it snow [Part 2]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "First family merge/Christmas" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Kara is having trouble comprehending just how sweet Alex truly is."

When Kara woke up, it took her a couple of seconds to realize where she was.

 

For a moment, she closed her eyes and thought about her excellent evening with Alex Danvers, the part-time mechanic. Smiling brightly, she pulled the blanket over her nose and cuddled herself into the mattress.

 

Then her mind drifted to the reason _why_ she’d ended up in Alex’s bed in the first place.

 

Her car.

 

That stupid thing that had left her stranded in a small town in a different state with very little resources to get back to National City. And Kara still needed to call her mother and break the news to her.

 

“Fudge,” Kara grumbled, pressing her hands against her eyes. “Fudge, fudge, fudge brownies.”

 

When she heard a quiet chuckle next to her, Kara froze.

 

Lowering her hands from her eyes, she watched as Alex stepped fully out of the bathroom. She’d obviously taken a shower - if her wet hair was any indication - and had wrapped a fluffy terrycloth robe around her body that left her calves and shins exposed.

 

“Good morning,” Kara whispered, looking up at her host, who walked over to the closet.

 

“Morning,” Alex replied, giving Kara a friendly smile. “I didn’t mean to startle you, I just forgot to get myself some clothes before going into the shower.” She pulled out a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a jumper before crouching down to open one of the drawers.

 

“It’s alright,” Kara said, trying to sound cool and collected. “It’s your apartment.”

 

Alex chuckled again.

 

“I’m going to get started on breakfast once I’m dressed. It’ll be done when you get out of the shower.” With her clothes, Alex got back to her feet and gave Kara another smile. “Are pancakes alright with you?”

 

Nodding shyly, Kara slowly peeled back the blanket.

 

“You can wait until I’m done getting ready; you don’t have to do everything by yourself,” she said, setting her feet onto the floor and pushing herself upright. “I’ve already taken up way too much of your kindness.”

 

Alex shrugged.

 

“The way I see it, you were keeping me company out of the goodness of _your_ heart,” she replied with a wink, before vanishing inside the bathroom and closing the door behind herself. Kara tried not to imagine what Alex looked like under that bathrobe.

 

She wasn’t sure she’d survive.

 

-

 

“I’m not the best cook,” Alex admitted as she set the plate of pancakes in front of Kara. “But I think the pancakes should be edible. My dad likes to complain about the fact that I didn’t inherit his cooking skills.”

 

Smiling, Kara slid a pancake onto her plate and picked up the maple syrup.

 

“I’m sure they’re great,” she said, blushing a little at Alex’s dazzling smile. “You didn’t have to do all of this. Thank you so much.” Even if the pancakes ended up tasting like cardboard, Kara would eat all of them. “I feel like I should give you a gigantic tip for your car maintenance.” She cut the pancake in half. “Since you’ve mostly been doing Kara maintenance.”

 

Alex grinned to herself, then speared one of the pancakes with her fork.

 

“I couldn’t just leave you out in the cold,” she said, uncapping the maple syrup and pouring out a generous amount. “Figuratively and literally.”

 

They ate in companionable silence for several minutes. While Kara agreed that the pancakes weren’t perfect, she’d definitely eaten worse food before, and the maple syrup took care of the rest.

 

“Did you figure out if there’s a bus and plane connection that can take you home on time?” Alex asked casually as she drank her orange juice. Her hair was still a little damp and she brushed it back when it fell into her eyes.

 

Kara sighed. Not even Alex’s attractiveness could distract her from the truth.

 

“No… I could maybe get on a plane last minute if I’m lucky, but everybody seems to be flying today. And even if that wasn’t the case, the bus situation in your town sucks. No offense.” Kara poked at her second pancake. “I’ll tell my mom to send you an invitation to my funeral.”

 

Shrugging softly, Alex pulled a second pancake onto her plate.

 

“I’ll drive you,” she said, almost causing Kara’s neck to snap as she whipped up her head to stare at Alex. “I told you I don’t have anything to do for Christmas this year and the shop closes at twelve PM today.”

 

“You can’t drive me,” Kara said, her eyes as wide as saucers.

 

“Why not?” Alex asked, furrowing her brows.

 

“B-Because!” Kara stuttered, putting down her cutlery. “You towed my car to your garage, you gave me your jacket, you let me stay at your apartment and you made me breakfast. I can’t ask you to drive me all the way to National City.”

 

“You’re not asking; I’m offering,” Alex said, clearly charmed by Kara’s babbling. “At least this way I can tell my parents that I didn’t just laze around the couch and neglect my research in favor of rewatching old cartoons.”

 

Kara was pretty sure she wanted to marry this woman.

 

“Would it be very inappropriate if we just made out right now?” Kara asked, feeling half-dazed as she tried to make sense of why she’d gotten this damn lucky. “Are you going to ask for my firstborn in return?”

 

Alex’s laugh was beautiful.

 

-

 

“Alright, do you have everything?” Alex asked Kara, fiddling with her keys to the garage. When Kara nodded, Alex closed and locked the door and gestured to her car. “Then I guess it’s time to get on the road if you want to make it to your mom’s dinner.”

 

“You are a true hero to the people,” Kara groaned as she got back into the car. She and Alex had hung out in the garage all morning while Alex tended to any last-minute customers. “I’m going to send you a fruit basket. No wait, I’ll write a glowing article about you.”

 

With a grin, Alex sat down in the driver’s seat and buckled herself in.

 

“I think you’ve thanked me plenty. It’s fine,” she said, pulling out of her parking space. “The knowledge that you won’t end up slaughtered by your mother is enough for me.” Her profile looked ridiculously handsome in the midday sun.

 

Kara tried not to let her leering show too much.

 

-

 

A couple of hours later, Kara was already vibrating in her seat at the prospect of seeing her entire family again. She wasn’t just nervous, she was also excited. Even though her grandmother wouldn’t be happy about Kara’s outfit.

 

Since the highways and streets had been packed with people trying to get home, the drive had taken just a bit longer than Kara had anticipated, which meant she’d been forced to ask Alex to drop her off at the restaurant instead of at her apartment.

 

“You look nice,” Alex said, trying to soothe Kara’s nerves. “And once you tell your family that you did everything you could to get back to them, they’re probably just going to be really happy that you’re there at all.”

 

Slumping down in the passenger seat, Kara sighed.

 

“I hope so,” she mumbled.

 

The last few hours with Alex had proven to Kara yet again that the two of them just clicked. They’d spoken quite a bit, but when there’d been silences, they hadn’t been uncomfortable. And when Alex had tried to explain her theory, Kara had actually been _interested_.

 

“The restaurant is right over there,” Kara said, pointing to their right. “There’s a parking lot next to it that you can use.” Her heart was starting to beat faster. This likely wouldn’t be the last time she’d see Alex, but it had been so nice to have her around.

 

Kara almost wished she could invite her inside.

 

But that would probably take things just a bit too far.

 

-

 

With the car parked, Kara slowly pulled herself outside.

 

To her great surprise, Alex exited her vehicle as well.

 

“Thank you again for driving me,” Kara said, moving around the car and giving Alex a warm smile. “You didn’t have to go out of your way to do that for me. If there’s anything I can do for you… just let me know.”

 

Alex leaned her arm against the top of her car.

 

She was just about to say something, when a voice reached them.

 

“Kara, dear, is that you?”

 

Turning around, Kara was faced with her grandmother, who was standing next to another car. Behind her, Kara’s mother, father and brother exited the vehicle, and Kara guessed that she probably deserved some embarrassment after all the help she had received from Alex.

 

“Yes, grandma, it’s me,” Kara called back, waving at her family. Half-turning to Alex, Kara whispered the rest of the words out of the corner of her mouth. “Either you get back in the car and run now, or you’re going to meet my family.”

 

“We’re moving a bit fast,” Alex joked back, making no effort to get back into her car.

 

About a minute later, Kara’s family had joined them.

 

“Hey guys,” Kara said, hugging first her mother, then her father, then her brother. Her grandmother was too busy looking at Alex to notice Kara’s hug. “My car broke down and Alex was kind enough to drive me here. I didn’t have time to change.”

 

Kara’s mother Alura gave Alex a calculating look. She truly was ever the _judge_. Then, obviously satisfied with what she was seeing, she smiled and walked forward to shake Alex’s hand.

 

“Alura In-Ze,” she said. “I’m Kara’s mother. It’s great to finally meet one of Kara’s partners. Thank you for driving her.”

 

Kara paled, but Alex only smiled.

 

“Of course, ma’am,” she replied, clearly showing how much she was used to talking to people at her part-time job as a mechanic. If Kara had been hit with such a blunt misassessment of their relationship, she definitely wouldn’t have acted this collected. “Kara and I only met yesterday. I picked up her car.”

 

Kara’s mom raised an eyebrow, while her grandmother patted Alex’s arm.

 

“That was good of you, honey,” she said before hooking her arm through Alex’s. “Be a dear and take this creaky old lady inside, would you? You’re staying for dinner. It’s the least we can do after you helped our little Kara.”

 

Mike snickered and nudged Kara’s arm with his elbow.

 

“Grandma is totally trying to hook you up,” he whispered, earning _him_ an elbow to the gut.

 

“I’m sure Alex has better things to do than to spend an evening with our family,” Kara’s father added, giving Alex a much more skeptical look. “We shouldn’t monopolize her time and keep her from her own family.”

 

The words were out of Kara’s mouth before she could stop them.

 

“Actually, Alex doesn’t have any other plans,” she blurted out, immediately sending Alex an apologetic look. She definitely hadn’t planned for that to happen. “But it should be her decision if she wants to stay or not, grandma.”

 

With everybody staring at her, Alex seemed just a little less confident.

 

“I guess I could stay for a little while,” she finally acquiesced, clearly intimidated by what would happen if she upset Kara’s grandmother. “But I wouldn’t want to intrude on your family time together.”

 

Grandma El waved her off.

 

“Don’t be ridiculous, dear,” she said, already pulling Alex along with her old, wispy hands. For an eighty-one year old woman, she sure walked fast.

 

-

 

Kara wasn’t at all surprised when she ended up seated next to Alex at the table.

 

It took a good half an hour for the rest of the family to trickle into the restaurant. They’d rented a room just for themselves. Kara tried to ignore how Grandma El described Alex and Kara as a lovely pair.

 

“I’m sorry I dragged you into this,” Kara whispered out of the corner of her mouth. “If I’d known my grandma would do this, I would have made you let me out around the corner.” Worrying that that sounded a bit mean, Kara clarified. “Not that it’s not nice having you here, but hanging around the entire clan can be a bit overwhelming.”

 

Alex nodded.

 

“It’s always just been me and my parents, so this is definitely something else,” she agreed, sipping on the wine she’d ordered herself. “But it’s nice, too. I’ve never really had the chance to experience a big family like this before. It’s certainly a lot louder than I expected.”

 

Smiling painfully, Kara patted Alex’s arm.

 

“My family likes to pretend that we’re all very sophisticated and in control of ourselves, but when we all get together it’s a totally different story.” She sighed. “I think I might actually have to give you my firstborn after all of this. I can never repay you enough.”

 

Alex laughed, and it drew the attention of several people.

 

She really was radiant.

 

-

 

“So, what do you like to do for fun?” Mike asked Alex, a cup of punch in his hand that Kara hoped hadn’t been spiked. She didn’t feel like getting drunk tonight. “Kara is boring, so I have no idea what you could possibly see in her.”

 

Kara hit him upside the head.

 

“You’re rude,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Just ignore him.”

 

Alex grinned into her glass of water.

 

It was now several hours later, and the party had finally started. After the buffet, the restaurant had brought in the DJ. It wasn’t a House of El party without some terrible (and also wonderful) eighties music.

 

“I like to do research for my theories,” Alex replied, turning Mike’s smile into a frown.

 

“Shit,” he said, shaking his head. “You’re just as boring as her.”

 

Kara kicked his shin, but Alex laughed. She’d stopped drinking after the first glass of wine, seeing as she still needed to be able to drive her car, but she seemed to be having a good time. At least she hadn’t given any indication that she wanted to leave the party.

 

In the corner, Kara spotted her mother and Astra locked in an arm-wrestling competition, which meant they’d definitely downed a good amount of alcohol. If _Judge In-Ze_ let her hair down, there simply was no other explanation.

 

Shaking his head some more, Mike stalked off.

 

“Your brother is very charming,” Alex said sarcastically, putting her glass down on the bar table they were standing next to.

 

Kara rubbed her forehead.

 

“He’s still learning,” she said, feeling weirdly woozy. She had a feeling the punch really had been spiked. “Mom and dad can be sort of strict, so Mike likes to rebel.” She rolled her eyes, then quickly realized that the alcohol made that a very bad idea.

 

“What about you? Did you rebel?” Alex asked, an interested smile on her lips.

 

“No, not really,” Kara replied, wishing she had a more interesting answer. “I entered a beauty pageant once to stress out my mom, but that was it, really.” She shrugged. “I was never much of a rule breaker.”

 

“Did you win?” Alex placed her elbow on the bar table. “The pageant?”

 

Kara blushed.

 

“Sadly, yes,” she said, putting down the punch and pushing it away. “I think Mike spiked this.” She looked around for her brother to glare at him. She didn’t want to be drunk and messy around Alex.

 

“I think I saw your grandma standing next to the bowl with a flask earlier,” Alex said, pointing behind herself at the buffet. “I figured it was some sort of family tradition, so I didn’t say anything.”

 

Sighing, Kara tried not to sway as the full effect of the alcohol hit her.

 

“Not a family tradition,” she said, reaching out and grabbing Alex’s arm for balance. “I think my grandma is trying to get me laid. I get very inapprop- inappr- handsy when I’m drunk.” She looked up at Alex. “I feel floaty.”

 

Alex smiled gently.

 

“I’ll take you home,” she said, wrapping her arm around Kara’s waist.

 

“Thank you,” Kara slurred, leaning heavily on Alex as they walked over to Kara’s parents to tell them they were leaving. “Alex is driving me home.” Kara almost fell flat onto her face when she leaned down to tell her mother where she was going. Alex was the only thing that kept her on her feet.

 

“Your parties go way harder than ours,” Alex said as they left the restaurant, Kara basking in the scent of the other woman. “When my parents get drunk, my mom just gets surly that I’m not working hard enough.”

 

“Pretty sure your mom’s never met you,” Kara replied, letting herself get pushed into the passenger seat and buckled in. When Alex was leaning over her, Kara wrapped her arms around her and held on tightly. “You’re the nicest person I’ve ever met.”

 

From her awkward position, Alex patted Kara gently on the shoulder.

 

“Thanks,” she said, before untangling Kara’s arms from around her neck. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

 

Once Alex was in the driver’s seat, Kara told her the address and Alex turned on her car’s GPS to find it. Kara watched her as she typed in the information. Those fingers were giving her a serious situation in her panties.

 

“You can stay at my place,” Kara said, her head turned to the side so she could look at Alex’s profile. “You can sleep in my bed. It’s big enough for both of us. I promise I won’t try anything, even though I’m drunk and you’re pretty.”

 

She hadn’t meant to say that last part, but Alex only smiled.

 

-

 

Inside the apartment, Kara almost crashed into one of her cupboards, if Alex hadn’t pulled her back at the last second.

 

“Let’s just get you into bed,” Alex said gently, moving Kara forward. “Which room is it?” She looked around, while Kara tried to work her fingers properly to point the way. “Alright, I think I get what you’re trying to say.”

 

She half-dragged Kara over to the bedroom.

 

“Do you think you can get undressed by yourself?” Alex asked, sitting Kara down on the bed. When Kara nodded, Alex smiled. “I’ll get you some water from the kitchen. Just tell me when you’re in your pajamas.”

 

Kara gave her a vague thumbs up.

 

“You’re so nice,” she mumbled, grabbing Alex’s hand and bringing it to her cheek. “I would totally marry you right now if I wasn’t so drunk.” She stroked her fingers along the back of Alex’s hand. “So nice.”

 

She barely even noticed Alex’s blush.

 

-

 

“Are you sure this is fine?” Alex asked as she slid under the covers on the other side of Kara’s bed. “I can go and sleep on the couch. Or I could find myself a hotel. I know not everyone is as cool about strangers staying at their place.”

 

Kara mumbled and scooted closer.

 

“You’re not a stranger,” she whispered, wrapping her arm around Alex’s torso. “You’re warm.”

 

Alex laughed.

 

“There’s really no logical link between those two things,” she said, pulling the blanket over herself. Half-shrugging, Kara leaned up on her elbow and tipped forward, sloppily pressing her lips against Alex’s chin.

 

She’d been aiming for her mouth, but her coordination wasn’t working with her.

 

“Let’s just shelve this conversation for when you’re sober again,” Alex said gently, guiding Kara back onto the bed, ignoring Kara’s pathetic whining. “I’ll still be here tomorrow, don’t worry.” She turned off the bedside lamp and turned away from Kara.

 

A couple of seconds later, Kara was curled up against her back.

 

-

 

“Oh god, let it end,” Kara groaned as she woke up. “I’m ready.”

 

“There’s water and painkillers next to you,” Alex whispered, her voice rough from sleep. The fact that she was here - in Kara’s _bed_ \- shouldn’t have been a surprise. And yet, it was. “How bad is your headache?”

 

Kara turned away from Alex to take the painkillers (and to hide her blush).

 

“I’d say like an eleven on a scale of one to five,” Kara grumbled, slumping back onto the bed. “At least I’m not nauseous. Ugh, that would be the worst.” She rubbed her face and tried to remember everything she’d done the night before. “Did I say anything embarrassing? My memories are kind of hazy.”

 

Alex sat up and looked down at her fondly.

 

“You said I was pretty,” she replied, scratching at her left cheek. “But other than that…” She smiled. “You promised to marry me, so I’ll just be waiting for our engagement ring in the mail from now on, I guess.”

 

Kara groaned.

 

“End me,” she whispered, turning away from Alex once more and burying her face in her pillow. “I’ll just smother myself right now and put us both out of our misery.” She regretted the quick movements instantly. “I’m sorry if that made you uncomfortable.”

 

“It didn’t,” Alex admitted, her hand tentatively settling on Kara’s back. “I thought it was sweet.”

 

Kara’s heart skipped a beat.

 

“Oh?” she asked, slowly pulling her head out of her pillow.

 

“Yeah,” Alex said with a small smile. She looked good in Kara’s t-shirt. And in Kara’s bed. In her apartment. Her life. “I actually wanted to ask you something, and I hope it wasn’t just the drunk you talking.”

 

She bit her bottom lip and Kara raised both eyebrows.

 

“I’m not going to lie, I think we don’t know each other well enough to get married,” Kara replied instantly, pushing herself up on her elbows. “I make it a habit to wait for at least three days to make sure it’s the real deal.”

 

Alex’s smile was so achingly gentle that Kara wanted to go back to hiding.

 

“I was thinking four days,” Alex teased.

 

For a moment, neither one of them moved. Then, slowly, Alex leaned forward, leaving Kara ample time to pull away if she wanted to. When their lips brushed, the world seemed to stand still and Kara felt butterflies erupt in her stomach.

 

Fireworks erupted all around her, and Kara lifted her right hand to cup Alex’s cheek as they continued to press their lips together. Nothing more, nothing less. Just a chaste morning kiss. The promise of something more.

 

“That’s not a question,” Kara breathed as Alex pulled away.

 

“I guess not,” Alex replied, dropping back onto the mattress. “Felt more like an answer to me.” She let out a slow breath. “I just want to brush my teeth before I can give you a more definitive one.”

 

Kara laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love these dorks. That was part 2! see you for something new tomorrow!
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for editing this :))
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	13. don't go breaking my heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Twitch" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Kara has a mysterious twitching in her chest."

“Alex?” Kara asked, poking her boot against her sister’s leg. “I have a thing.”

 

Grunting, Alex pushed away from her microscope to give Kara a confused look.

 

“A thing?” she asked, leaning back in her chair and giving Kara a once-over. When she didn’t see anything out of the ordinary, she raised both eyebrows. “Are you okay? Do you need me to get you anything?”   
  


Fiddling with her fingers in front of her body, Kara took a step forward.

 

“I have a twitch,” she confessed, drawing ever-closer to Alex. “I think that Cadmus guy from yesterday shot me with something that makes my heart twitch.” She rubbed the offending spot. “Like it’s going to explode.”

 

Alex was on her feet in an instant.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me about that sooner?” she demanded, pulling Kara along by the hand and sitting her down on one of their solar dispensers. “How long has this been happening?” From a nearby drawer, she pulled out a stethoscope.

 

“I was fine straight after and while we were at the DEO. And I didn’t feel anything at home either. It only started when I left for work.” Letting her feet bounce back and forth, Kara slumped her shoulders a little when she saw Alex’s disgruntled look.

 

“Kara, that was hours ago,” she grumbled, unhooking Kara’s cape. “Take off your top.” Complying immediately, Kara pulled her hair back so Alex could press the stethoscope against her chest. 

 

“I don’t hear any irregularities,” Alex mumbled, pressing the cold metal against several different spots on Kara’s chest. “We should do an echocardiogram just to be sure.” Putting down the stethoscope, Alex handed Kara back her top. 

 

Frowning softly, Kara pressed her hand against her chest.

 

“Weird, the twitching’s stopped,” she wondered aloud, watching as Alex walked over to where she’d been working to put the sensitive material she’d been looking at back into one of the many refrigerators. 

 

“We’re still going to do the echocardiogram,” Alex insisted, waiting until Kara had put on her top once more. “I am not risking you, just because the problem comes and goes at whim. We’re getting to the bottom of this.”

 

Kara sighed, but nodded.

 

-

 

The echocardiogram was perfectly clear.

 

With a heavy frown, Alex pulled Kara to their MRI machine. Then their CT. 

 

When nothing indicated that Kara wasn’t perfectly healthy, she started to think about what other tests they could possibly run. Kara could tell that Alex wouldn’t stop, so she did the only logical thing, and left her alone to her thoughts.

 

As she flew through the city, she tried to find crime that needed to be stopped, but the streets seemed to be all too quiet. There weren’t even any cats or snakes that needed to be pulled from trees.

 

Sighing to herself, Kara returned to CatCo to work on that article she’d been slacking off on. Her new editor really was a pain in the ass, and he liked to assign her the most boring stories under the sun.

 

Kara needed a new hit article. Something that would impress Snapper.

 

She’d just sat down at one of the desks in the building, when she felt it again.

 

That twitching.

 

Pressing her hand to her chest, Kara gasped in pain as the feeling became even worse than before. Quickly, she abandoned her notes and walked over to the nearest empty office that she could fly out of.

 

She didn’t want to draw a crowd. A hospital was the last thing she needed right now.

 

In a matter of seconds, she was in her Supergirl suit and out of the window.

 

Because of the pain, she couldn’t fly as fast as she wanted to, so it took her a few minutes longer than usual to reach the DEO’s city tower. She almost fell when she reached the main floor. Some of the agents reached out to her, and one them steadied her.

 

“Need… Alex…” Kara gasped, pushing her hand more firmly against her chest. “Alex.”

 

Nodding, one of the agents started running as fast as she could, dodging other people as she made her way up and into the lab to get Kara’s sister. Meanwhile, Kara almost crumpled to the ground, if it hadn’t been for the agent holding her up.

 

When Kara looked up, she saw Alex jump the last four steps and run towards her at a speed that shouldn’t have been humanly possible. As always, Alex defied the laws of reality to get to her.

 

As soon as Alex reached her, the twitching became less pronounced.

 

“Come on,” Alex said, wrapping one of Kara’s arms around her shoulders. “I’m taking you into the lab and strapping you permanently to a sun dispenser until we figure this out.” She carried Kara almost single-handedly upstairs, while the other agents watched on in concerned silence.

 

None of them wanted Kara to suffer.

 

By the time they’d reached the lab, Kara felt fine once more.

 

“I don’t know what’s happening, but I don’t like it,” she said, laying down on the solar dispenser without making a fuss. “I wasn’t even doing anything exhausting. I was just trying to write an article.” 

 

Alex huffed, then strapped Kara down. 

 

“I am getting to the bottom of this,” she said, running her fingers through Kara’s hair. “And you aren’t leaving this room until I do.” She pulled open another drawer and drew out a syringe. Its metal was coated with green kryptonite to allow it to prick Kara’s skin.

 

“It came back almost as soon as I left here,” Kara explained, wincing when Alex started taking a blood sample. “I think we should talk to J’onn and Mon-El if they recognize the weapon the guy used on me. And let Winn run a search in the database.”

 

“Way ahead of you,” Alex replied, taking another vial of blood. “Winn is already searching, and Mon-El and J’onn are on their way right now. I sent them an SOS.” Once she was done, she wiped down Kara’s arm and dumped the syringes down their trash chute to get them out of Kara’s vicinity.

 

As soon as they were gone, Kara’s skin healed itself.

 

“I also asked the agents down in holding to bring up Astra,” Alex said, sitting down next to Kara and taking her hand. “She might be able to tell us even more than the others.” Sighing, Kara nodded her head. She still wasn’t very keen on talking to her aunt, but Astra knew more about alien technology than almost anyone else she knew.

 

“Okay,” Kara whispered, smiling softly when Alex leaned in to kiss her forehead.

 

“I love you,” Alex said, conviction lacing her tone. “We’ll fix this.”

 

Kara nodded.

 

-

 

“Yes, I recognize the symptoms,” Astra said, nodding as she accepted the tablet Winn was gingerly holding out to her. Her hands were shackled with kryptonite, and she looked more tired than Kara had ever seen her. 

 

It took everything inside her not to run forward and hug her aunt.

 

“Just as I thought,” Astra continued, looking down at the picture of the ray gun. “It’s Condorian in nature. I’m sure whoever is using it must have salvaged it from Fort Rozz before it was destroyed. We had quite a few Condorians with us.”

 

Kara frowned.

 

“Condorians? How come I’ve never heard of them?” she asked, trying to sit up on the solar dispenser before remembering that she’d been strapped down. “My mother never mentioned them to me.”

 

Astra mimicked Kara’s expression.

 

“They were a vicious race,” she explained, handing the tablet back to Winn. “They developed heinous weapons and used them indiscriminately. Not all of them, of course. But those who remained did not wish to be associated with the rest of their kind and chose to rename themselves.”

 

“How can we fix Kara’s problem?” Alex asked impatiently, her hand clutched tightly in Kara’s.

 

“The removal of the toxin is quite easy, actually,” Astra said, giving both Alex and Kara a look. Her eyes softened when they met Kara’s. “The weapon causes heart failure quickly in its victims. There is only one cure, and many do not possess it at the time of attack.”

 

“What is it?” Alex asked, now sounding almost anxious.

 

“Love,” Astra replied, giving Alex a calculating look. “On a biological level. The weapon was not designed to be one-hundred percent efficient. The Condorians loved sick games.” Astra look a step forward. “Tell me, Little One, when did the twitching begin and when did it stop?”

 

Chest aching at the old, familiar nickname, Kara forced herself to make eye contact with Astra.

 

“I was hit yesterday. Alex took me home after and spent the night. Then this morning, I went into work and the twitching started.” She furrowed her brows. “It wasn’t too bad at first, but then at around lunchtime I went to see Alex in the lab, where we ran some tests. But by that time, the twitching had stopped… again…” Kara’s eyes flit to Alex. “When I left, it became so bad I could barely fly. But then…”

 

Astra nodded.

 

“Of course,” she said, looking at Alex, who didn’t seem to be grasping what Kara had just said. “I should have known that the Brave One would be the only one for you.” She gave Alex another calculating look, while Alex raised both eyebrows and opened her mouth to respond. “You must share your blood with her.”

 

Alex’s mouth snapped shut.

 

“What?” she asked, her hand squeezing Kara’s more tightly.

 

“The weapon created a shortage in Kara’s system that cries out for the blood of her mate. For now, your presence is enough, but the attack will not truly be over until you’ve injected her with your blood.” Astra seemed more than a little impatient. At the same time, Alex looked around at the people in the room.

 

None of them seemed terribly surprised at this revelation, save perhaps for Mon-El.

 

But even he seemed to be accepting the news much faster than Alex.

 

“Agent,” Astra said, looking like she wanted to cross her hands over her chest, “act fast.”

 

It took Alex a couple more seconds, before she complied and got herself a syringe. When she tried to poke herself, J’onn stepped forward to draw the blood for her. Once it was done, he slipped off the tourniquet and handed Alex the syringe.

 

“This seems unsafe,” Alex said, looking down at Kara’s face.

 

Kara’s heart was beating rapidly, but it wasn’t from any kind of twitching.

 

If this was true, then the two of them would have a  _ lot  _ to talk about.

 

Mating rites on Krypton had been a huge part of their culture, and Kara had believed up until she’d come to Earth that there was a perfect match for her out there. Biologically perfect. And if this ray gun was right…

 

She winced when Alex pushed in the needle and pressed down the plunger.

 

“I’m sorry,” she said, pulling out the needle and throwing it down the chute. “How are you feeling? Do you think you’re having a negative reaction?” Mixing blood generally wasn’t a smart idea without doing all sorts of tests - Kara was aware of that. But she was a Kryptonian. Even if Alex’s blood hadn’t solved her problem; it still wouldn’t attack Kara’s cells.

 

“I feel fine,” Kara said, motioning for Alex to get her out of her restraints. 

 

“We will not know for sure until Agent Danvers leaves this room,” Astra said, looking fondly at her niece. “But I am glad you have found your perfect match, Little One. The Condorian weapon worked so well because most people never do.”

 

“If Kara shows a negative reaction, call me,” Alex demanded, pointing from Mon-El, to Winn, then to J’onn. When they all nodded, she squeezed Kara’s hand one last time before starting to walk outside.

 

Sitting up on the daylight dispenser, Kara pressed her hand against her chest.

 

Nothing twitched.

 

Even when Kara couldn’t hear Alex’s heartbeat anymore, she seemed to be just fine. 

 

“I guess… it worked…” Kara said quietly to herself. What were the odds that she would meet her perfect biological match in her foster sister? Kara didn’t like to believe in fate - unless it was the kind she made for herself - but in this moment, she wasn’t sure what else to call it.

 

A few minutes later, Alex returned.

 

She was slightly out of breath, which told Kara that she’d run back.

 

“Did it work? Are you okay?” she asked, walking back inside the lab with an anxious expression on her face. 

 

When Kara smiled, Alex nearly sobbed, before throwing herself into Kara’s arms. She was warm and comfortable, and Kara wondered how she could have missed this feeling for the past fourteen years. 

  
“I guess we need to talk,” she whispered so only Alex could hear her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am so tired. barely had time to write today *instantly falls asleep*
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing this :))
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	14. fake it til you make it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Sharing a hotel room" [Alex x Kara; Fluff-Angst]
> 
> Summary: "Alex and Kara go on a mission. Alex isn't into it."

“I don’t want to do this,” Alex grumbled, throwing herself down on the hotel bed behind her. “It makes absolutely no sense that there was no other way for us to do this.” She put her hands behind her head and watched as Kara put down their luggage.

 

“It’s a retreat for lesbian couples, Alex,” Kara replied, putting her suitcase at the bottom of the bed before slumping down next to her foster sister. “This is going to work.” Alex knew damn well how much work it had taken to get them their fake identities and to create a fake life for them online.

 

The people at this event did their research and background checks very thoroughly.

 

Before Alex could argue any more, Kara poked her in the ribs.

 

“And it has nothing to do with the fact that you’re actually a lesbian,” Kara chided her, rolling onto her side and looking down at Alex. “We’re really the best pick for the job. People mistake us for girlfriends all the time anyway. Not a huge leap to think we’re wives.”

 

Alex sighed.

 

She knew they’d needed two people who were completely comfortable with one another to ensure the safety of the operation, but that didn’t mean she had to be happy about it. Her feelings for Kara were complicated enough without adding the pressure of a pretend-relationship.

 

“You want to go through our cover story again?” Kara asked, placing her head on Alex’s chest.

 

Alex did not.

 

“I know the damn story by heart,” she grumbled, wishing she could go home and forget about this stupid mission altogether. Her problem wasn’t that being married to Kara sounded awful. The exact opposite was true.

 

“Humor me?” Kara poked Alex in the stomach. “Might help to get you into character. We’re supposed to be in love and excited to be here after our honeymoon.” She leaned up again. “Which we had where?”

 

Sighing, Alex closed her eyes.

 

“Paris,” Alex grumbled, digging her nails into her stomach. “I wanted to go to Rome to look at all the gorgeous artwork and architecture, but you wanted to go to Paris, because it’s the city of love or some bullshit.”

 

Kara huffed.

 

“Be serious, please.” She placed her hand on Alex’s forehead and drew her fingers down in an ancient Kryptonian ritual that was supposed to calm the nerves and relieve the spirit of any extra stress.

 

“Whatever,” Alex whispered, unconsciously relaxing her fingers. “We went to Paris because I wanted to make you happy and I can’t resist your pout.” The sad thing was that Alex knew exactly that this would be how it would go down if they actually did tie the knot. She was weak and Kara’s pout was very powerful.

 

“And how did we meet?” Kara’s voice had grown quiet as she continued to run her thumb over Alex’s forehead. Alex had no idea if the ritual actually worked or if it was Kara’s mere presence that was putting her at ease.

 

“We met when we were fourteen. Your family moved to Los Angeles and you fell in love with me immediately.” How much Alex wished that turn of events had actually taken place. How much she wished she could have loved Kara the way she had wanted to all these years.

 

“I think you’re remembering that wrong,” Kara replied, chuckling and pressing a kiss to Alex’s cheek. “I think you’ll find that you fell in love with _me_ immediately.” She was already playing the character and Alex was powerless to resist.

 

“I think we’re just going to have to agree to disagree on that,” Alex mumbled back, opening her eyes to look up at her foster sister. “How did we actually get together?” She watched Kara’s lips curl up into a smile.

 

“I asked you to prom during our senior year,” she whispered, abandoning Alex’s forehead in favor of tracing the back of her nose. One of Kara’s favorite pastimes was to memorize the lines and angles of Alex’s face. She liked to say that it calmed her down. Alex sometimes wondered if the touching would stop as soon as Kara found someone else to memorize. Someone she wanted to spend her life with. “And then you punched a guy who overheard us and said something about screwing me straight.”

 

“I hate that particular detail of the story,” Alex confessed, uncomfortably shifting on the bed. “It’s too real.” She looked away. During high school, she’d punched plenty of people whenever they picked on Kara for being into weird stuff. But neither one of them had ever been ‘accused’ of being into women. Mainly because Alex had been dating guys constantly to overcompensate, and because Kara had actually been interested in dating them.

 

“It’s supposed to be,” Kara whispered, moving her hand down to Alex’s chest and rubbing her sternum to calm her down. “We’re supposed to be approachable and relatable to the women here.”

 

Alex rubbed her arm.

 

“It feels dirty,” she said, closing her eyes again. “They come here to feel safe and to be around people like them, and then we come in to infiltrate this safe space.” She sighed and looked back at Kara. “I know there’s some bad shit going on here and that we need evidence, but it still doesn’t feel _right_. Most of the women here are good people.”

 

Frowning gently, Kara leaned down to press her lips against Alex’s temple.

 

There were tons of little tricks that Kara had picked up on over the years. Things she’d realized would help to calm Alex’s anxiety and worry. The temple kiss was one of the big guns; one that usually involved Kara covering Alex’s entire body with her own.

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara whispered, inching closer until she could slide her leg over both of Alex’s. She was always very careful not to startle Alex in situations like this. “I didn’t even think about how this would make you feel. I guess you might like to come here at some point with your future wife to feel safe.”

 

The resort was a nice place run by an even nicer couple of lesbians.

 

It was supposed to be a safe haven for lesbian couples who wanted to have a few weeks of peace and who liked the idea of being around other women loving women. Up until this mission had come about, Alex had had no knowledge of its existence.

 

“We’re doing the right thing,” Alex said, biting her bottom lip. “I know that.”

 

Someone was trying to destroy this place using alien technology, and Alex wanted to ensure that wouldn’t happen. But some small part of her didn’t like the idea of deceiving these women who had already been through so much hardship in their lives.

 

Women that Alex belonged to.

 

Her people.

 

“It’s okay to be upset,” Kara whispered against Alex’s skin.

 

Trying to shake off the unease, Alex wrapped her arms around Kara’s back.

 

“Let’s just get this over with. Let’s find out which two women here are faking their relationship so we can stop them.” She needed to say the words out loud to remind herself that what they were doing was important.

 

“We really were the best two candidates for the job,” Kara repeated, cupping Alex’s cheek. “We won’t even have to fake all that much. We already love each other more than tons of married people do.”

 

Alex hummed noncommittally.

 

“There’s a difference between loving each other and being in love,” she whispered, trying to ignore how good it felt to have Kara so close. That was one reason she’d been so reluctant to agree to the mission.

 

She just hoped no one would expect them to kiss.

 

“I told you people think we’re in love all the time,” Kara said, leaning up on her elbows.

 

 _Probably because I’m in love with you_ , Alex thought.

 

“Probably because you’re actually in love with me,” Kara teased her, wiggling her eyebrows. With a grin, she brushed their noses against one another. “And who wouldn’t be, with my absolutely fantastic charm.” Her dorky grin was nearly wider than her face.

 

Alex’s heart clenched in her chest.

 

“Right,” she agreed, consciously relaxing her hands on Kara’s back. “You’ve got me.”

 

Kara giggled.

 

“That I do. There is no escape from my love.” Kara pressed a series of small pecks against Alex’s face, somehow managing to drive the stake in even deeper. “I’ve been thinking, actually. Do you feel like we should practice kissing? Before we get into a situation that requires us to kiss and we don’t actually know how to do it with each other?”

 

A part of Alex split off and spiraled into the ether.

 

Or at least that was what it felt like.

 

“It’s just a kiss like any other, Kara. No one is going to dare us to make out here.” There was simply no way in hell that Alex would ever kiss her foster sister. She would never be able to let go. “We’re not a couple who is big into PDA. There. Fixed.”

 

Kara pouted.

 

“Fine,” she said, resting her chin on her left hand. “Spoilsport.”

 

“Sorry,” Alex replied, not actually sounding sorry at all. “No kissing on missions.”

 

“Pretty sure Mon-El and Winn have kissed on missions multiple times,” Kara retorted, going back to her earlier preoccupation of touching Alex’s face with her index finger.

 

“That’s because they’re unprofessional.” Alex stared up at the ceiling in the hopes of forgetting that Kara was on top of her. This was one instance where her attempt to calm Alex down had the opposite effect.

 

Humming, Kara shuffled down the bed a little so she could rest her head on Alex’s chest.

 

“Your heart is beating really fast,” she observed casually. “Did you take your meds this morning?”

 

Alex had always had a history of high blood pressure.

 

Too high, her doctor had said.

 

 _You try living and caring for a Kryptonian all your life_ , was what she’d wanted to tell him.

 

“Yes, Kara,” Alex said, hoping that her heart would chill itself out soon. She didn’t want Kara to start questioning their closeness and how it could be linked to Alex’s increase in heart rate. “I took my meds and I drank that disgusting green smoothie you made.”

 

Turning her head, Kara laid a kiss on Alex’s chin.

 

“I love you,” Kara murmured, cuddling back into Alex’s chest.

 

“I love you, too,” Alex replied.

 

 _And you have no idea how much_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so it turned out more angst than fluff, which is probably a reflection of my poor mental state last night haha. maybe I'll continue this at some point where Alex and Kara actually get to the bottom of things and Kara realizes "wait a second... actually... i do love Alex..." and they live happily ever after
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing!
> 
> yell at me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	15. did we sleep together?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Fan" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Kara is banned from her room."

Kara was sitting on her bed with a book on her lap. She was behind on her reading for one of her classes, because her roommate Lucy had decided that going out to go shopping two days ago sounded a lot more fun than staying inside to study.

 

Kara had agreed, but only because Lucy was very hard to say no to.

 

Now that she was finally able to have some quiet time to read while Lucy was out, Kara could barely concentrate. She was tired, because Lucy had kept her up all night by dragging her to some asinine frat boy party off campus.

 

Since Kara had been the one driving them, she’d spent the entire evening sober, bored, and annoyed. The only bright spot had been a run-in with a nice brunette drunk girl. She’d probably been too drunk to remember their encounter (and she’d disappeared up the stairs with a girl at some point), but Kara had enjoyed talking to her more than she’d enjoyed anything else at that dumpster fire of a party.

 

Yawning, Kara slipped further down on her bed and rested the book on her face, even though that maneuver pressed her big glasses uncomfortably into her skin. At this very moment, she was too exhausted to care.

 

Stupid Lucy and her stupid ability to make Kara do almost anything.

 

When the door to her room opened thirty minutes later, Kara startled awake, her book falling to the floor with a loud  _ thump _ . It was Lucy, of course, with her boyfriend James. The two of them had met in high school and were barely keeping their relationship alive at this point, but Kara hadn’t tried to talk about it with Lucy.

 

Kara knew her friend was well aware of the state of her relationship, especially since she’d been hanging around with Vasquez more and more - who was one of their TAs. Kara suspected that Lucy was developing much stronger feelings for them than she was letting on.

 

“Hey, Kara,” Lucy said, pulling James along by the hand. “You still have laundry to do, right?”

 

It was their code word.

 

Laundry.

 

Sex.

 

Sighing inwardly, Kara nodded, picked up her book and threw it onto the pile of laundry in the hamper. Whenever Lucy wanted the room to sleep with James, she asked Kara to go down to the laundry room.

 

Kara didn’t actually need to go there, but their hamper was pretty full anyway, so she thought she might as well. 

  
“See you later, Luce,” Kara said, waving at her and James as she left the room and closed the door behind her. At least she wouldn’t have to hear them having sex downstairs. The last time she’d tried to stay in the common room, she’d gotten to hear much more than she ever wanted to.

 

Slowly making her way downstairs, Kara yawned heartily.

 

Rubbing her eyes, she pushed the door to the laundry room open with her hips. Her eyes were almost closed by that point, so when she spotted a figure sitting on one of the washing machines, Kara almost jumped.

 

A fan in the corner blew cold air into the room.

 

It took Kara a couple of seconds to recognize the girl.

 

“Oh, hey,” Kara said, putting her hamper up on a different washing machine. “It’s you.”

 

“Yep,” the girl replied, brushing her brunette hair out of her eyes and giving Kara a weird look. “It’s definitely me.” She eyed Kara with mild worry. “Do I know you? Um… did we… did we sleep together or something?”

 

Blushing furiously, Kara almost broke her hamper’s handles off.

 

“No,” she stuttered, adjusting her glasses. “No, we definitely didn’t sleep together.”

 

“Oh,” the girl said, shoulders slumping in relief. “Cool.”

 

Now Kara felt a little hurt.

 

“You should only be so lucky to get to sleep with me,” Kara grumbled, pulling out her book and cracking it open. She knew the brunette didn’t remember her because she’d been drunk at that party, but Kara still took her comments personally. 

 

The brunette chuckled.

 

“You’re cute,” she said, pulling up one of her legs and wrapping her bare arms around it. She was wearing a loose black muscle shirt that showed off her impressive biceps. “But you obviously know me from somewhere, so why don’t you tell me.”

 

Rolling her eyes, Kara tried to ignore the flutter of butterflies in her stomach at the way the girl had called her cute. 

 

“We met last night, actually. I think you were too drunk to know what was going on.” Putting down her book, she started pulling the clothes out of her hamper and stuffed them in the washing machine she was standing in front of. “I liked you better when you were drunk. You were a lot nicer.”

 

The girl grinned.

 

“So I keep hearing,” she said, jumping down from the washing machine and stretching out her hand to Kara. “I’m Alex Danvers. I’m currently hiding out down here because my roommate Maggie is getting it on with her girlfriend Kate in our bedroom. That’s why I’m a little grumpy.”

 

Staring at Alex’s hand, Kara bit the inside of her cheek.

 

It couldn’t hurt to make a new friend.

 

“Kara Kent,” Kara replied, shaking Alex’s hand. “And believe it or not, I’m down here because my roommate Lucy is having sex with her boyfriend in our room right now.” Alex’s hand was warm and calloused.

 

The fan twitched and sputtered in the corner.

 

“Kent, huh? Nice name,” Alex said, leaning against the table in the middle and giving Kara a calculating look. “I don’t remember last night’s party very well, to be perfectly honest with you. I hope I didn’t say anything totally offensive.”

 

Kara shook her head and continued to stuff clothes into the washing machine.

 

“You were very sweet and I was bored out of my mind,” Kara replied, closing the machine and setting it properly. Hopefully Lucy and James would be done by the time the washing machine was done. Kara didn’t want to spend her whole night down here.

 

“I was sweet, huh?” Alex repeated, giving Kara a pleased smile. “I have my moments.”

 

“Clearly,” Kara said, crossing her arms over her chest. 

 

“I think we got off on the wrong foot today,” Alex said, running her hands through her hair, revealing three piercings in her left ear and a sliver of naked stomach. Kara could’ve sworn she’d seen the glimpse of a tattoo. “I’m sorry. My biology classes are kicking my ass this semester.”

 

Pursing her lips, Kara contemplated what to say next. She could tell Alex to go to hell and find her own spot to hide out in, or she could be the bigger person. Really, Alex hadn’t even said anything mean to her.

 

“Alright,” Kara acquiesced, jumping up on one of the washing machines that wasn’t vibrating. “We can start over. If we have to stay down here in this hole while our friends are having fun upstairs, I guess it wouldn’t hurt for us to bond.”

 

Alex grinned.

 

“That’s the right attitude,” she said, jumping up next to Kara. “What degree are you pursuing?”

 

Kara moved her feet up and down.

 

“Journalism,” Kara said, trying not to notice how gorgeous Alex’s profile looked from this angle. “How about you? You said something about biology?” Somehow, Alex didn’t look much like what Kara had expected a biology major to look like.

 

“Yeah, I want to be a bio-engineer,” Alex replied, shrugging with one of her shoulders. “Mostly so my mom will shut the fuck up about  _ carrying on the Danvers legacy, Alexandra _ .” Her voice took on a more high-pitched tone towards the end.

 

“Would you want to study bio-engineering if your mom didn’t want you to?” Kara hadn’t anticipated that she would be talking about mommy issues with this beautiful and pompous stranger. 

 

Alex shrugged.

 

“Probably,” she said, swinging her legs back and forth. “Or maybe I’d just go out with pretty girls all day.” She shrugged. When Kara didn’t say anything, Alex looked up at her. “That was a joke. I played with the thought of going into law enforcement.”

 

Letting a smile crack her lips, Kara shrugged her shoulders.

 

“I would like to get an art degree, but my cousin said that a journalism degree would offer me more secure job opportunities.” She frowned slightly. She knew Clark meant well, but that didn’t mean his words hadn’t hurt her by implying that her art wasn’t good enough to make it.

 

“Well aren’t we great,” Alex joked, bumping her shoulder against Kara’s. “Following our dreams.”

 

Kara sighed.

 

“You know my mom keeps pestering me about settling down,” Alex continued, shrugging her shoulders up and down and up and down while the fan in the corner blew more cold air into their direction. A steady backdrop of sound. 

 

“You should just tell her you have a steady girlfriend and be done with it. And when she asks to meet her, you take one of your friends and pronto presto, she’s off your back.” Kara didn’t like to advertise lying, but she knew the pain of relatives asking her if she’d found a  _ boyfriend  _ yet. 

 

Never a girlfriend, even though Kara had told them time and time again that she was bisexual.

 

“That’s actually not a bad idea,” Alex mused, rubbing her chin in thought.

 

“There you go,” Kara said, patting Alex on the shoulder.

 

“I see why I talked to you last night.” Alex grinned. “You’re cool.” 

 

Kara blushed.

 

She was anything but cool.

 

“We should hang out more,” Alex decided, leaning back on her arms and looking Kara up and down. “Hey, you know what? Why don’t you be my girlfriend in front of my mom? She’d love you. You’re smart and beautiful and you’re not afraid to tell me to fuck off.”

 

Kara blushed even harder.

 

Alex thought she was smart?

 

“Stop flattering me. It’s not going to work. I’m not sleeping with you,” Kara teased her, trying to downplay her own reaction. It was difficult, especially when Alex started laughing loudly. Such a pretty laugh.

 

“Pity,” she joked, nudging Kara’s arm with her elbow. “I’m great in bed.”

 

Kara rolled her eyes.

 

“Sure,” she said, sitting on her hands, trying to hide her smile.

 

Maybe hanging out with Alex Danvers wouldn’t be so bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got this prompt here: http://scottsunmers.tumblr.com/post/114657284183/meet-weird-aus
> 
> more fake dating aus amirite. hope you enjoyed!
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for checking this for mistakes!
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	16. there's no place i'd rather be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Taking time off to work shit out/going on holiday" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "The lake house used to belong to Alex's grandfather."

“Do you think we have everything?” Alex asked, looking at the full trunk in front of her. “Can you x-ray the bags again and see if I missed anything? You have the list memorized, right?” She placed her hands on her hips and looked over at Kara, who was holding onto the backpack she’d keep up front with her in the passenger seat.

 

“I x-rayed the bags three times already, Alex. We have everything; trust me. And if we don’t, we can just buy the rest when we get there. I can fly.” Kara rubbed her hand along Alex’s shoulder in a reassuring motion. “We’re only going to be gone for a week. Our apartments will still be here by the time we get back.”

 

Worrying her bottom lip with her teeth, Alex nodded in agreement.

 

“You’re right; we should get going.” Smiling shyly at Kara, she closed the trunk, which made a satisfying clicking sound. “Sorry for all the anxiety. I just want this trip to be perfect, you know?” Her eyes flit down to Kara’s lips.

 

“It will be,” Kara whispered back, giving Alex’s cheek a kiss. “Because we’re going to be together. And we can finally take a couple of days off to talk about some stuff. And then we have the rest of the week to just…” She cupped Alex’s cheek. “Just be you and me.”

 

-

 

It had taken years to get them to this point.

 

Literal years.

 

Alex was turning thirty-three in two months, and Kara had dated and broken up with Mon-El, before getting back together with James and breaking up with him again. For a while, Alex had been happy with Maggie, before they’d run into some incorrigible differences in the form of Maggie’s ex-girlfriend showing up in town.

 

Alex was over it now, but there had been a couple of months where she had not been fine.

 

Following their break-up, Alex and Maggie had reverted back to being best friends. And after the whole James part two fiasco, Kara had decided that maybe the whole dating thing just wasn’t for her. 

 

At least until now.

 

-

 

“You have to take a left here,” Kara pointed out. “The house should be just around the corner.”

 

Turning the car into the right direction, Alex smiled in recognition as the old lake house came into view. It had once belonged to her grandfather, and Alex and Kara had come up here over the years plenty of times.

 

At least until Kara had become Supergirl.

 

Usually, superheroes didn’t get a vacation, but Clark had volunteered to leave Metropolis in the hands of some of his friends. He’d temporarily moved to National City so Kara and Alex could have some time to themselves to work everything out between them.

 

People didn’t just sleep with their foster sisters without it needing to be addressed.

 

“I missed this place,” Kara sighed happily, jumping out of the car as soon as Alex turned off the motor. She drew a deep breath, stretched out her arms and turned in a circle. “It still smells exactly the same.” 

 

Folding herself out of the driver’s seat, Alex placed her arms on the hood of her car and watched Kara spin and spin and spin. A small smile stretched across Alex’s lips, and when Kara stopped and looked at her, Alex didn’t even blush.

 

“Don’t stop on my account,” Alex said, walking around the car to pop the trunk. “I love it when you’re happy.” At Kara’s glowing look, Alex finally did blush. Maybe talking about their feelings wouldn’t be so bad.

 

“I love it when you’re happy, too,” Kara replied, coming up to Alex and running a hand along her back. She could touch Alex now, she realized. She didn’t have to hold herself back in any way. “I can carry all of this inside. I don’t want you to hurt your shoulder again.”

 

Alex huffed.

 

“I’m not eighty. My shoulder’s perfectly fine,” Alex protested, demonstrably picking up one of the heaviest suitcases. A few months ago, Alex had been shot in the shoulder with a kryptonite bullet that had been meant for Kara.

 

“Alex,” Kara scolded her, taking the suitcase directly out of her hand. 

 

“Fine.” Alex rolled her eyes. “I guess I’ll just unlock the door.”

 

Trudging up to the house, Alex fiddled around with her keychain for a few seconds before finding the right key. The open living room that lay beyond looked just the same as it had during their last visit several years ago. Alex’s mother paid for a cleaning crew that cleaned the place every couple of months to keep it from falling apart.

 

“It’s good to be back,” Alex echoed Kara’s earlier sentiment, pushing the door open widely and breathing in the scent of the lake house. “God, it’s like I’m twenty-five again.” Grinning, she watched as Kara super sped their luggage inside.

 

Once the car was locked, Alex closed the door behind them.

 

Kara rubbed the back of her neck.

 

“Do you want to share the master bedroom?” she asked, looking suddenly shy.

 

Alex hadn’t slept in the same bed as Kara since they’d made love after an emotionally gruelling alien attack; one that had almost resulted in Kara’s death and had given Alex the fright of her life. 

 

It had also managed something that Alex had never quite been able to do on her own; it had pushed her directly into Kara’s loving embrace. 

 

They’d talked about it a little bit (of course they had), but being surrounded by the noise of the city and the people crying out for help, there hadn’t been a moment for them to simply exist and evaluate what they both wanted. 

 

But now, here, that was different.

 

“Yeah, I’d like that,” Alex said, reaching out and taking Kara’s hand. 

 

Alex was pretty sure of what they both wanted.

 

What they’d wanted for years without being able to put it into words.

 

“Can I help you carry our bags upstairs?” Alex asked teasingly, picking up one of the smaller ones. Rolling her eyes, Kara nodded her head and picked up the suitcase with their clothing. The heaviest bags were the ones holding all of the food that Kara needed to eat to keep her Kryptonian metabolism happy.

 

Together, they made their way through the house and up the stairs.

 

“I think this is going to be the first time in months that I’ll be sleeping in,” Alex commented as she threw herself onto the comfortable bed and stared up at the impressive skylight above her. “Possibly years.”

 

Kara set down their suitcase at the foot of the bed before slumping down next to Alex.

 

“No one to save. No parallel universes. No attacks on the city.” Kara turned onto her side and propped her head up on her left hand. “Just you for a whole week.” Her right hand settled on Alex’s stomach. “Thanks for coming with me.”

 

Alex gave Kara a loving look.

 

“I want to figure this out as much as you do,” she whispered, making Kara’s heart flutter with excitement. “I think we’ve waited long enough. Twenty years is enough time to let the dust settle.”

 

Moving up her hand, Kara drew her index finger over Alex’s neck. 

 

“Plenty of time to fall in love,” she murmured. 

 

“Yeah,” Alex breathed, feeling her heart beating like a sledge hammer. “At least no one can say that we rushed into this. Especially my mom.” At the mention of Eliza, Kara sighed and gave Alex a sad look.

 

“You still think she’s going to be angry at you for this,” Kara whispered, lifting her fingers to Alex’s mouth and stroking along her bottom lip. “Your mother just wants you to be happy, and she wants me to be happy. She’s not going to be angry that we’re going to make  _ each other _ happy.”

 

Looking away, Alex tried to ignore the goosebumps on her arms.

 

“We’ll see, I guess,” Alex replied, closing her eyes and enjoying the feeling of Kara’s fingers tracing along her skin. “She’s not going to have a say in this anyway. So it really shouldn’t matter what she’s going to think.”

 

Smiling sadly, Kara leaned down to nuzzle Alex’s cheek with her nose.

 

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.” Kara pushed herself into a sitting position before swinging her leg over Alex’s hips and straddling her lap. “Now we should probably go downstairs and put the food in the fridge. I don’t want it all to go to waste.”

 

Alex chuckled, her hands settling on Kara’s waist. 

 

“I doubt the food is going to go bad with you around to eat it,” she teased, squeezing Kara’s hips. “But if you’re so desperate to go back downstairs, you should probably get off me.” Their first time had been frantic and driven by intense desperation to reassure themselves that the other was really fine.

 

On this trip, though, Alex knew things would be different.

 

They had time now; they were both safe.

 

“I know.” Kara pouted, her hands settling on Alex’s stomach. “But you’re so comfortable.”

 

Alex chuckled.

 

-

 

After dinner, Alex sat on the couch with a book in her lap; Kara was sketching her, a look of concentration on her face. They hadn’t spoken about the shift in their relationship after putting away the groceries, not because they were avoiding the topic, but because they didn’t feel rushed in any way.

 

Alex felt as though this lake house was a safe space.

 

Nothing could penetrate it.

 

“Do you want to move into my apartment?” Kara asked, not looking up from the sketchpad. The thought had seemingly come into her head with no context for it, and it took Alex several seconds to realize what the question implied.

 

“Are you sure you want me to live with you full-time?” Alex looked over her book at Kara’s profile. Her hair was falling around her face and she looked absolutely radiant in the low light from the ceiling lamp. 

 

“Of course I do,” Kara replied, moving her pencil in a rapid motion that indicated she was applying shading. Alex had watched her paint and draw too many times not to notice a few things. “To be honest, I’ve missed not living with you anymore.” She finally looked up to lock eyes with Alex. “I hated the idea of college for a while, because it took you away from me.”

 

The breath almost froze in Alex’s lungs.

 

“I didn’t know why, though,” Kara continued, shrugging one shoulder. “I tried not to think about it too much at the time.” She looked back down again, her pencil held loosely in her right hand. “We could look for a new apartment, if you want.”

 

Alex put her book on the coffee table and sat up, wrapping her arms around her knees.

 

“Your apartment is fine,” she said, committing Kara’s gorgeous profile to memory like she had a million times before. “We need to talk about which parts of our furniture we’re going to keep and what we’re going to throw out, though.”

 

Nodding in understanding, Kara went back to shading.

 

“We’re going to need a bigger cupboard for our combined DVD and book collections.” Kara smiled shyly and brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. “And I don’t even know how we’re going to fit all of our clothes onto my clothes’ rack.”

 

Alex shrugged.

 

“We’ll just buy a bigger one.” 

 

Putting down her sketchpad and pencil on the coffee table as well, Kara leaned sideways against Alex’s legs and stroked along Alex’s bare arm with her fingers. When goosebumps broke out under her touch, Kara leaned down to press a kiss against the back of Alex’s hand.

 

“I’m glad we’re finally doing this,” Kara whispered.

 

“I’m glad we’re finally together,” Alex replied.

 

-

 

“Do you want to tell everyone at once or one by one?” Alex asked into the darkness, staring up at the skylight above their bed. Kara was curled around Alex’s body, her head pillowed on her chest.

 

They’d changed into their pajamas in silence. 

 

There still wasn’t any reason to rush.

 

They had the rest of their lives, after all.

 

“I don’t know,” Kara admitted, her fingers sliding along Alex’s abdominal muscles under her shirt. “I think I want to tell J’onn first, though I think he probably already knows.” J’onn was perceptive, even when he wasn’t using his powers. “I don’t think he’s going to be mad.”

 

“He’ll be thrilled,” Alex said, rubbing her hand along Kara’s shoulder.

 

“Do you want to tell your mom before or after we come out to more of our friends?” Kara’s index finger drew the Kryptonian letters for  _ love _ into Alex’s stomach. “She’ll probably be mad if we leave her out of the loop for too long.”

 

Alex sighed.

 

“Yeah, we should probably get that over with sooner rather than later.” She watched as a satellite moved across the night sky. “Maybe we can invite mom up to National City to talk everything out in person. I don’t want to do this over the phone.”

 

“Or we could go to her. That might make her more comfortable,” Kara suggested, nuzzling her nose against Alex’s t-shirt. Her scent had always calmed Kara down. 

 

“It might remind her that we were supposed to be siblings, though,” Alex joked, moving her head to the side to kiss Kara’s forehead. “That didn’t work out the way she wanted it to, so we might not want to remind her of that by telling her in my childhood home.”

 

Humming thoughtfully, Kara closed her eyes.

 

“I guess you’re right. And if she sees that we’re living in the same apartment and planning our life together, she might feel less inclined to think that this is just a phase.” Kara’s ear was resting on Alex’s chest to listen to her steady heartbeat.

 

“If she even utters the word  _ phase _ , I swear to god,” Alex grumbled, pulling Kara closer.

 

Kara giggled.

 

-

 

“I made pancakes,” Kara offered when Alex shuffled down the stairs the next morning. 

 

“Thanks,” Alex murmured, rubbing one of her eyes. 

 

“You’re welcome,” Kara said warmly, taking Alex by the hand and leading her over to the table that separated the kitchen area from the living room area. “They come with a special treat this morning.”

 

Kara sounded nervous, and Alex raised an eyebrow.

 

“What kind of treat?” she asked, leaning against the table and scrutinizing Kara’s shy expression. 

 

She got her answer when Kara leaned forward to press the smallest of kisses against Alex’s lips. Even though the kiss was short, Alex closed her eyes to take in the feeling. Her lips tingled and she instinctively reached out to wrap her arms around Kara’s waist.

 

One kiss turned into two, turned into three.

 

And before they knew it, they were making out against the counter while the pancakes grew cold. That wasn’t an issue, though. After all, Kara’s heat vision was good for more than just frying bad guys.

 

“This is nice,” Kara husked, her hands cupping Alex’s face and holding her close. “We should definitely do that more often. Especially when we move in together. I vote that movie nights will include kisses from now on.”

 

Smiling dumbly, Alex surged forward to kiss Kara again.

 

“You can kiss me as many times as you want; whenever you want,” Alex breathed, pushing Kara harder against the counter. “I can’t believe it took us  _ twenty years  _ to figure all of this out.”

 

Kara shrugged.

 

“We were sort of busy,” she said, stroking Alex’s skin. “Saving the world, hiding my powers.”

 

Nodding thoughtfully, Alex buried her face in Kara’s neck.

 

“I’m just saying,” she whispered, her hands sliding under Kara’s pajama top. “We could’ve been feeling like this for a long time.” She enjoyed how Kara’s fingers sifted through her hair. 

 

“We wouldn’t have felt the same,” Kara replied, holding Alex close. “All of this was necessary.”

 

Alex grumbled, but she knew Kara was right.

 

Without the things that had held them back, they might never have made it to this place.

 

And Alex wouldn’t change a damn thing about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOOK AT THEM FINALLY WORKING SHIT OUT. years later. also in my mind kara and mon-el dated for like 5mins before they both realized they hated it and there was barely any touching
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing this!
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	17. hold me tight in the dead of night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Camping trip/Sharing a tent" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Alex doesn't like camping, but Kara still makes her tag along."

“Do you think we’re going to be there soon?” Alex asked, holding on tightly to the straps of her backpack as they all made their way over the uneven forest floor. “I feel like we’ve been trying to find this damn campsite for hours.”

 

Kara giggled.

  
“It’s been thirty minutes, Alex,” she said, bumping their shoulders together. “We still have a bit more to go.” She was carrying a backpack that was almost bigger than her, while Alex had opted for a more manageable one. 

 

Not everyone had Kryptonian super strength.

 

“Is Danvers already complaining? You owe me ten bucks, Lane,” Maggie chimed in, a triumphant look on her face. The others were all walking ahead of Alex and Kara, so Alex could see Lucy’s pissed expression quite clearly.

 

“You couldn’t have waited for a couple more minutes?” Lucy asked Alex, pulling her wallet from the inside of her jacket and pulling out a ten dollar note. “Unbelievable.” While Lucy sulked, Maggie pocketed the money with a self-satisfied expression.

 

“Do any of you remember that we’re out here on a mission?” Alex asked, looking from a grinning Kara to a disgruntled Lucy over to a distracted Winn and a fascinated James, who was taking pictures with his camera. Maggie snorted at her.

 

“Lighten up, Danvers,” she said, still obviously pleased with her winnings. “Gathering samples is not a mission.” Alex knew she was right; she’d just been trying to divert the attention from herself onto something else.

 

Primarily, they were here to hang out in the woods, go hiking, and fish in a lake.

 

So many fun activities.

 

Alex almost vomited at the idea.

 

She was only here because Kara had asked her to come along, so Kara wouldn’t have to share her tent with anybody else. Despite Kara’s genuinely friendly nature, she hated being in close quarters with anyone who wasn’t intimately familiar to her.

 

When she was asleep, she was more vulnerable, and her senses tended not to shut themselves off as efficiently. So when she slept next to someone else, the sounds that their body made would often shake Kara awake.

 

A different heartbeat, the sound of their blood rushing through their veins, their breathing.

 

It had taken a long time for Kara to grow used to Alex’s presence. 

 

And now she could barely tolerate anybody else.

 

(Alex hadn’t asked why Kara couldn’t have just slept alone in one of the tents.”

 

“Shut up,” Alex grumbled to Maggie, who smirked and turned back around to chat with Lucy some more. As they continued to make their way forward, Alex held Kara back a couple of steps. “How about you just fly us into a hotel room once everyone else is asleep. And then you can fly us back in the morning.”

 

Grinning, Kara wrapped her arm around Alex’s shoulders and kissed her head.

 

“You’re so cute when you’re grumpy,” she murmured, ignoring Alex’s disgruntled attempts to pull away. “This is going to be fun. You’ll see.” She rubbed Alex’s shoulder. “It’s going to be so healthy and relaxing to be cut off from the world for a few days.”

 

Sighing, Alex slid her own hand around Kara’s waist. Even though Kara’s backpack made this maneuver somewhat difficult, Alex made it work. And if her hand sat a little bit lower on Kara’s hips as it usually would have, then Kara’s ass would just have to deal with that.

 

“I happen to like being connected to the world,” Alex mumbled, even though that wasn’t exactly true. Alex just liked being connected to things like toilets and showers and microwaves. All good inventions that made it possible for Alex to live and work comfortably. 

 

All least they had a walking microwave in Kara.

 

“Stop complaining,” Kara whispered, kissing Alex’s temple. “You could’ve said no.”

 

Scoffing, Alex raised one of her eyebrows.

 

“Right,” she said sarcastically, thinking about the truly epic pout Kara had given her. Alex still couldn’t believe she’d held out for all of thirty seconds. A new personal record. “I definitely wasn’t tricked into coming here.”

 

Kara looked entirely too satisfied with herself.

 

-

 

“This is the spot,” Kara confirmed when the others looked at her. “There’s a fire pit right over there and the tents are supposed to go on that patch of grass there.” She placed her hands on her hips and gave them all a smile. She couldn’t wait to get this camping trip started properly. “I think we should start with setting up the tents.”

 

James and Winn moved over to the patch of grass first, while Alex slumped dejectedly onto one of the logs around the firepit. Since they were caught up in conversation, Maggie and Lucy hardly noticed it when Kara sat down next to Alex and took her hand.

 

“You want to help me set up the tent?” Kara asked gently, giving Alex’s cheek a small kiss. She knew that Alex had been less than thrilled at the idea of going on a camping trip (she was a beach girl, not a camping girl), but Kara hadn’t wanted to go on the trip without her big sister. It was silly and childish, but Kara wanted all of her happy memories to include Alex in some way.

 

It wasn’t like she’d lied about the fact that she found sleeping next to humans who weren’t Alex quite difficult, but she could have just as easily slept on her own. Not that Alex had brought that up, either.

 

“I want to sleep already,” Alex said, placing her hands on her knees and sighing quietly.

 

Kara nudged their shoulders together and rested her head against Alex’s.

 

“If you help me set up the tent, I’ll fly you anywhere you want after we get back to National City,” Kara promised, squeezing Alex’s knee with her hand. She ignored the giggles coming from Maggie and Lucy (they had some weird ideas about Alex and Kara’s relationship).

 

“You’d fly me anywhere right now, if I asked you to,” Alex grumped, pushing herself to her feet. “But fine, let’s set up this tent.” Slipping off her backpack, she mimed rolling up the sleeves of her jacket. 

 

Kara had to work very hard not to stage a little happy dance.

 

-

 

“This wasn’t actually all that bad,” James said as he finished off his bowl of pea soup that Kara had previously warmed up with her heat vision. “I was actually mostly worried about the food.” He scraped up the last bits of soup with his piece of bread.

 

“Are you saying I can’t cook?” Kara asked, a look of pretend-offense settling over her features. While the others had all put on their jackets (Alex was wearing Kara’s on top of her own), Kara was still sitting around in her t-shirt. 

 

“I would never,” James replied, grinning at her with a look that was almost too innocent.

 

“Good.” Kara waved her fist around. “Supergirl doesn’t like being criticized.”

 

Snorting, Alex put down her bowl.

 

“Supergirl should stop referring to herself in the third person,” she teased, placing her hand on Kara’s knee. “Or else Alex is going to kick Supergirl’s butt.” Her remark made Kara fondly shake her head.

 

“I think Winn and James should wash the dishes, since Maggie and I set up the fire,” Lucy interrupted their banter, getting up from the log she was sitting on and putting her bowl next to the washing up bucket. 

 

“I second this motion,” Alex agreed, pulling herself and Kara up to her feet. “Kara and I cooked.” It was a lie, mostly. Alex hadn’t done much but look for the dishes and bread. Still, she wasn’t about to get loaded down with chores. “Good night, everybody.”

 

Taking Kara’s hand, Alex led them both over to their tent. It was set a little further away from the other two, so Kara wouldn’t have trouble sleeping through the night. It still wasn’t a perfect solution (the tents weren’t exactly sound-proof), but Kara had already decided that she would spend the night sleeping on Alex’s chest.

 

Alex’s heartbeat never failed to lull Kara to sleep.

 

After they’d brushed their teeth, Alex and Kara shut the flap of the tent behind them and collapsed on their inflatable mattresses and sleeping bags. Their shoes were kicked off unceremoniously and Alex let out a sigh of relief at the feeling of her feet finally being freed. Wearing shoes all day was a pain.

 

“I don’t know how you talked me into this,” Alex mused, turning her head to the side so she could give Kara a stern look. “You know how much I hate camping of any kind.” Tomorrow, she would spend an unnaturally long time gathering samples so she didn’t have to participate in any of the  _ fun  _ group activities.

 

This was like stupid summer camp all over again.

 

“It’s because you  _ love  _ me,” Kara crooned, sitting up and slipping off her t-shirt, leaving her in a white tank top. 

 

“Hardly,” Alex grumbled, unzipping first Kara’s and then her own jacket. “I think you put a Kryptonian curse on me. I have to do whatever you say and there is absolutely nothing I can do to stop you. Your pout definitely activates it.”

 

A dangerous grin spread over Kara’s lips.

 

“Anything, you say? Like, let’s say… going to a Justin Timberlake concert with me?” She giggled when she saw Alex’s disgusted facial expression.

 

“You’re evil,” Alex whispered, throwing her sweater at Kara’s head and nailing her square in the face. “I’m never going to pay money to see that guy in concert. No matter how many Kryptonian mind control curses you put on me.”

 

Pouting, Kara rolled over to Alex, who was taking off her bra under her t-shirt.

 

“But you love me,” Kara whined, poking Alex in the side.

 

“Love only goes so far, Kara.” Alex slipped off her pants and socks. “Even true love.” When she realized what she’d said, Alex’s cheeks flushed scarlet. “I’ve been watching too much shitty television with you.”

 

Smiling happily, Kara put her head in Alex’s lap and looked up at her.

 

“What we have is definitely true love,” she said, taking Alex’s hand and putting it on her own hair to indicate to Alex that she would like for it to be stroked and petted. “I will always find you, Alex. I will always find you.”

 

“Oh god, stop,” Alex pleaded, closing her eyes. “I’m having horrible flashbacks.”

 

Leaning up on her elbows, Kara gave Alex’s chin a small kiss.

 

“You’d make a great Prince Charming,” she whispered, sitting up so she could slide off her jeans and socks, too. “You’d rock those pretty coats and fancy tights and stuff.” Together, they slid inside their sleeping bags. In order to make one big bag, they’d zipped them together in the middle.

 

“Please stop comparing us to those terrible characters.” Alex leaned up to turn off the lamp they’d hung on the ceiling, plunging them both into complete darkness. Thankfully, Kara had glowing laser eyes that allowed Alex to slide back down without problems.

 

Chuckling, Kara curled herself around Alex and placed her head on her big sister’s chest.

 

“Fine,” she acquiesced, rubbing Alex’s stomach under the covers. For a couple of minutes, both of them simply breathed and took in the other’s company. It was nice and Kara wouldn’t have given it up for anything in the world. “Thanks for coming with me.”

 

Humming in acknowledgement, Alex wrapped her arms around Kara and held her tightly to her.

 

“Did you really think I was going to let you out of my sight for five whole days?” Alex whispered gently, rubbing up and down Kara’s back. “Who knows what kind of wild aliens could be living out here.”

 

“My hero,” Kara tried to tease, her voice sounding suspiciously serious.

 

“Yeah, yeah,” Alex replied, nuzzling the top of Kara’s head.

 

“I would’ve missed you.” Kara snuggled in closely to Alex, throwing one leg over her sister’s shins to achieve maximum cuddle contact. There was nothing better than being in a tent with Alex like this.

 

Nothing.

 

“I love you,” Alex murmured, rubbing along Kara’s arm. “Even when you drag me out into the wilderness so you can play some kind of mountain woman.” More kisses against Kara’s head. “Though that is an aesthetic I appreciate.”

 

With a big grin, Kara leaned up on her elbow and kissed Alex’s cheek.

 

“I love you, too.” Her next kiss landed dangerously close to Alex’s mouth. It was something they hadn’t addressed - the ever growing desire between them - and Kara knew this camping trip wasn’t the time to talk about it. But it was still tempting to just… lean in…

 

“Kara,” Alex husked while Kara’s lips hovered over her mouth. “Let’s just sleep, alright?”

 

Fighting with herself, Kara moved her kiss to the side of Alex’s mouth at the last second. 

 

“Sleep tight,” she whispered, lips tingling where they’d brushed her sister’s. 

 

(It took Kara over an hour to fall asleep.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They're just so cute. I love them so much
> 
> all mistakes belong to me.
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	18. i get knocked down (but i get up again)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Romantic getaway in a cabin gone awry" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Alex and Kara try to have a few quiet days together. Things don't go quite according to plan."
> 
>  
> 
> **Rated M for Mature.**

Walking slowly up the driveway of the cabin she had rented for the holidays, Alex pulled her suitcase after herself while Kara carried four other bags in her arms. They’d already celebrated Hanukkah at the beginning of the month, but now that lots of their friends were celebrating Christmas, Alex and Kara had decided to take a few days off from the DEO to spend some quality time by themselves.

 

“Can you open the door?” Kara asked, smiling at Alex as she came to a halt behind her. “I want to build a snowman as soon as possible.” She was almost vibrating with excitement and Alex laughed.

 

“Sorry that I’m not fast enough for you,” Alex teased, pulling the keys to the cabin out of her pocket. “We don’t all have super speed.” 

 

“You’re just a slowpoke.” Kara chuckled with amusement as Alex gave her the stink eye. 

 

Once they were inside, Alex put down the suitcase next to the door and placed her hands on her hips. Surveying her surroundings, she nodded to herself with satisfaction. This was definitely going to do just fine for what she had in mind.

 

“This is nice,” Kara echoed Alex’s thoughts, setting down two of the bags in the kitchen before grabbing the suitcase that Alex had left by the front door. “Do you know which one of these rooms is the bedroom?”

 

They were standing in the open living room and kitchen area, but they could see a hallway that led to both the bathroom and the bedroom. If Alex remembered correctly, the bedroom was the one on the right. She’d seen the blueprints of this place.

 

“Yeah, come on,” Alex said, waving Kara along as she walked through the hallway. “There’s only one bedroom, so this should be it.” Opening up the door, she furrowed her brows as she noticed… that there wasn’t a bed. “What the hell?”

 

Kara looked around at the inside of the room.

 

“Isn’t there supposed to be a bed in the bedroom?” she asked, raising one of her eyebrows. “Where is it?” The room held a big oak armoire, a desk and a bedside table. The place where the bed should have been sat strangely empty. “Why would anyone remove the bed from this place?”

 

Already fuming, Alex pulled her phone from her pocket.

 

“Guess we’ll just have to find out,” she said, dialing the number of the agency that had rented the cabin out to them. A few minutes later, after some heated words on Alex’s side, she hung up the call. “Turns out they forgot to put a new one in here after the old one broke down.”

 

Kara raised one eyebrow.

 

“So, what? Are they going to bring a new one up here?” she asked, still loaded down with the two remaining bags and Alex’s suitcase. 

 

Sighing, Alex shook her head.

 

“Apparently the road’s been closed behind us because of the snow,” she grumbled, walking back into the living room. “I guess that means we’re going to have to sleep on the couch.” At least there was a fireplace. Maybe this could still be salvaged and be appropriately romantic for their first holiday getaway.

 

“We can make a bed out of blankets on the floor, if the couch is too small,” Kara suggested, putting the suitcases down in the living room. “I’m warm enough for both of us.” Smiling, she put her arms around Alex’s body and nuzzled her neck. “And if all else fails, we can always just strip down and huddle for warmth.”

 

Rolling her eyes, Alex placed her own hands over Kara’s.

 

“Are you trying to get laid, Ms. Supergirl?” she asked, turning her head to the side and kissing Kara’s cheek. “Because I’ve got to tell you. You’ll have to work a lot harder than that to get me to put out for you.”

 

Kara giggled.

 

“I love you,” she murmured, holding Alex closer. “Can we go and build a snowman now?”

 

“Fine,” Alex relented, pulling her beanie and gloves out of her bag. “But we should put away the food first. I don’t want it to spoil.” It was unlikely that the food would degrade in the four days they were here (especially with Kara around), but she still didn’t want to take any chances. This was supposed to be their romantic getaway and Alex didn’t want anything else to get in the way of that.

 

The stupid bedroom situation was bad enough.

 

“Let me just superspeed them into the fridge,” Kara offered, kissing Alex’s cheek again. It took her less than five seconds to put everything away, and Alex had barely blinked by the time Kara was already back at her side. “Let’s go outside.”

 

Jumping up and down, Kara took Alex’s hand and dragged her along.

 

Alex only grinned.

 

-

 

The snowman turned out more like a big snowbird, which Alex didn’t mind in the slightest. When Kara had started sculpting a beak, Alex had simply gone with it (Kara had always had a fascination with birds).

 

The thing actually didn’t look all that bad and Alex had to take several pictures of Kara posing with the snowbird. Then, they’d taken several selfies together in front of the thing, until finally Kara had been satisfied with the documentation of their accomplishment.

 

“I love her,” Kara breathed, wrapping her arms around the neck of the bird. “She’s so beautiful.”

 

Grinning, Alex rolled her eyes at her girlfriend. 

 

While Kara continued to cuddle the sculpture, Alex casually walked around her and picked up a handful of snow. Forming a ball, Alex waited for the perfect moment. As soon as Kara’s eyes were closed, she reached back and threw the ball as hard and fast as she could. 

 

Kara was a Kryptonian.

 

She wouldn’t even feel it, but Alex had to try.

 

Of course, Kara’s eyes opened just as the ball was about to hit her face.

 

“Alex!” she protested, using her super speed to move out of the line of fire. “Don’t start a fight you can’t finish!” Pouting, she picked up a handful of her own snow. “And if I were you, I wouldn’t pick a fight with Supergirl.”

 

Alex crossed her arms over her chest.

 

“You’re all that, but only because you have your powers! If you didn’t use those, I’d get you every time,” Alex goaded her girlfriend, moving to the left to avoid Kara’s first projectile. “If you fought fair, I would beat your ass.”

 

An offended gasp told Alex she’d won their little teasing game.

 

“Alright, no powers,” Kara conceded, already stooping down to pick up the next handful of snow. “Let’s see how beat  _ your  _ butt is going to be once I’m through with you, Dr. Danvers.” She threateningly threw the snowball up and down.

 

They fought for a good twenty minutes, both of them getting plenty of shots in. 

 

When Alex hit Kara squarely in the face, Kara pouted even more, making Alex break out into a fit of laughter. She stopped abruptly when Kara’s snowball hit her. The force was so intense that it knocked Alex onto her ass.

  
“Fuck,” she groaned, holding her gloves up to her nose. “Fuck.”

 

Kara was by her side immediately.

 

“Oh my-- Alex, are you-- oh Rao-- you’re bleeding.” She was talking very fast, and moved her hands to Alex’s chin to tilt back her head. “Oh no, oh no, oh no.” She was clearly panicking, but Alex couldn’t focus on anything but the pain. A second later, Kara held a tissue under her bleeding nose.

 

“Is it broken?” Alex asked, wincing at the pain. At least there hadn’t been any stones or sticks in the snow. “Can you x-ray it for me?” And they had snow to cool her nose. So many positives…

 

Alex was hell-bent on seeing the good things about this damn romantic getaway.

 

“It’s not broken,” Kara said with relief, rubbing Alex’s back with one hand while she continued to hold the tissue against Alex’s bleeding nose. “But it’s swelling up a little.” She bit her bottom lip. “I’m so sorry, Alex. I promise I didn’t mean to throw it that hard.” She tentatively kissed Alex’s cheek. “I’m sorry.”

 

Shrugging with one shoulder, Alex picked up a handful of snow and held it against her nose. With a wince, she leaned her body against Kara’s. Her butt was starting to go cold from sitting in the snow, but Alex was loathe to ask Kara to carry her inside.

 

“It’s okay,” Alex said, trying to comfort Kara, who looked beyond distraught at this point. “Just give me a minute and I’ll be good as new.” The pain was pretty bad, but Alex had survived far worse in her life. “Can you help me to my feet? I’m pretty sure my butt is going to fall off if I stay on the ground.”

 

“I’ll take you inside,” Kara said gently, kissing Alex’s temple.

 

“No, Kara, really, it’s fine,” Alex protested, even though Kara had already moved Alex’s fingers to the bloody tissue so she could wrap her own hands around Alex’s back and under her knees. “Kara, I’m serious. I can walk.”

 

“Shush,” Kara said, hefting Alex into her arms and getting to her feet. 

 

Resigning herself to her fate, Alex held on to the tissue as Kara carried her over to the front door. While they’d been outside, the heater had done its job and the house was nice and warm. That was something, at least.

 

“I’m going to put you on the couch, okay?” Kara asked. “Then I’m going to get you some of the frozen food that we brought.” Kissing Alex’s forehead, Kara put her down on the cushions. 

 

This romantic trip really wasn’t going to plan.

 

Not at all.

 

-

 

Once the swelling had gone down and the bleeding had stopped, Alex and Kara decided to get dinner going. Since there was no stable internet connection out here (they were glad to have a phone signal), Kara had opened up her laptop to play them old episodes of  _ Homeland _ . They’d taken the first season for this very reason.

 

“Anything you want in particular?” Alex asked, looking into the fridge and inspecting the different kinds of food they’d bought. The thing was chock-full of all kinds of goodies. “Meat or vegetables? Pasta?”

 

“Pasta sounds good,” Kara replied, putting the kettle on the stove so she could make them both some tea. “I’ll start boiling the water.” They decided on the kind of sauce they wanted and got everything ready.

 

Alex wasn’t the best cook, but she wasn’t awful either.

 

After all, she’d been tasked with taking care of Kara when she was barely fourteen, and that had included all manner of household chores. Cooking was one skill that Alex had learned how to manage fairly quickly, since Kara inhaled food like a vacuum.

 

And she knew just how Kara liked her pasta. However, when she tried to put the salt into the water, the cap of the salt shaker fell off, pouring half of the salt straight down. She almost threw the damn thing across the room. 

 

“Today is not my day,” she grumbled, taking the pot from the stove and pouring the ruined water down the drain. “It’s like the powers that be don’t want us to have a good time here.” She ran the pot under the tap for a second, before filling it up with new water.

 

Kara smiled at her.

 

“That’s not going to get us down, is it?” she asked, curling her hand around Alex’s waist. “We’re still the Danvers. Those powers should reevaluate their choices.” She nuzzled Alex’s hair with her nose and squeezed her left hip. 

 

Alex nodded.

 

“Damn straight,” she murmured, measuring out the salt in her hand first this time around.

 

-

 

The pasta and sauce turned out just fine and even the grilled vegetables didn’t put up much of a fight. Alex had honestly expected them to sizzle enough to burn a hole into her clothes or something equally ridiculous.

 

With their bellies full, Alex and Kara set about making themselves a nest out of blankets and pillows on the ground. The sheets for the non-existent bed were in the armoire, so they had no trouble with that, at least.

 

And the bear rug in front of the fireplace held a certain level of welcome cliché.

 

“I feel like we should have sex on that thing,” Alex observed. She was sitting on the couch with a book. “Just to make sure we do everything right on this trip.” Kara was resting next to her with her graphic tablet on her lap. She was working on some fancy art design in Photoshop.

 

“I thought you said I had to try harder if I wanted to get laid,” Kara murmured, dragging her pen along the screen. 

 

Alex shrugged.

 

“The bear rug is very compelling,” she said, putting aside her book and slipping off her sweater. “But if you’re not in the mood, I can start without you.” Her bra came next. By the time she was down to her panties, Kara had shut off her graphic tablet. 

 

“Get down on that rug,” Kara commanded, grinning happily as she slid off her pants. 

 

-

 

“Ow, shit,” Alex said, rubbing the back of her head. 

 

“Are you okay?” Kara asked, looking up from in between Alex’s legs. Her lips were shining with Alex’s arousal. Up until a few seconds ago, she’d been quite busy with eating Alex out. “Did I hurt you?”

 

“Sorry, I just knocked my head against the coffee table.” Scooting away from the stupid piece of furniture, Alex tried to get back in the mood. The sudden surge of pain hadn’t exactly been pleasant. “Keep going, I’m close.”

 

“If you’re sure,” Kara said hesitantly, moving her her down again and continuing to lick at Alex’s clit. Her hands held Alex’s hips down, and her tongue moved with the grace and beauty that Alex had come to expect from her sister.

 

When she wasn’t busy being clumsy.

 

Trying to clear her mind, Alex closed her eyes and felt the moment. She’d almost succeeded - hurtling ever faster towards her orgasm - when she felt a sharp pain in her left calf. 

 

A goddamn cramp.

 

“Ow, ow, shit, fuck,” Alex whined again, surging up to rub her muscles. Sadly, that also meant pushing Kara out from in between her legs. “Sorry, my leg is cramping like crazy.” She couldn’t believe this was happening right now.

 

“It’s alright,” Kara reassured her, bringing her hands to Alex’s leg and rubbing it gently to help Alex through the pain. “You’ve had a lot of stress at the DEO lately. This is probably because of that.” She kissed Alex’s knee. “Do you still want to keep going?”

 

Alex wanted that orgasm.

 

“Yes,” she said, sighing in the relief when the cramp went away. “Please.”

 

Nodding, Kara slid up Alex’s body to kiss her.

 

“Maybe we’ll try it like this now,” she whispered, pressing their naked bodies together before she pushed inside of Alex. The fire crackled next to them, casting Kara in a warm, orange glow and making her look like sun goddess that she was. “Can you feel me inside you?”

 

Nodding breathlessly, Alex closed her eyes.

 

“Yes,” she almost whimpered, digging her nails into Kara’s back. “I feel you.”

 

“So deep inside you,” Kara whispered lovingly, pressing kisses along Alex’s jaw. “I wish I could stay here forever.” She thrust in and out slowly, moving her thumb to Alex’s clit. “I love you so much, Alex.”

 

She pushed in particularly roughly, making Alex throw her head back in the exact same moment that Kara moved her head closer to kiss Alex’s face some more. Sadly, this maneuver caused Alex to smash her nose against Kara’s chin.

 

“Fuck!” Alex yelled, bringing both of her hands to her nose, which had started bleeding again at the new assault. “That’s it! I’m giving up!” Groaning, Alex barely even realized when Kara slid out of her to get her a new tissue. “The universe obviously doesn’t want us to have a good time tonight!” 

 

Pushing herself to her feet, Alex dripped blood onto her own chest.

 

“I’m taking a shower!” Buck-ass naked, Alex stalked over to the hallway while Kara tried to press the new tissue to her nose so she wouldn’t trail blood through the entire cabin. “We’re going home tomorrow morning.”

 

“Alex, no, we can still make this work,” Kara tried to convince her, following Alex into the bathroom. “I bet that tomorrow everything will be great.” The water was ice cold when Alex turned it on, but at least it started heating up several minutes later.

 

If it had stayed ice cold, Alex would have had Kara take her home right this second.

 

Her girlfriend could  _ fly _ , after all.

 

“I am so done with this,” Alex grumbled, stepping under the warm spray, which washed away the blood. Her nose throbbed almost as badly as her nether regions did. She still needed to come, but she wasn’t risking sex in the shower, that much was sure. She’d probably end up breaking her neck. “I just wanted to have a few days with you.”

 

Sighing, Kara threw away the tissue before following Alex into the shower and closing the curtain behind them. 

 

“I love you,” she murmured, curling her arms around Alex’s waist and pressing her breasts against Alex’s naked back. “We just had a bad day.” She kissed along Alex’s shoulders. “I’ll make you breakfast in bed tomorrow morning and then we won’t do anything that could result in either one of us getting hurt.”

 

Leaning back against Kara, Alex closed her eyes.

 

“I love you, too,” she said firmly, turning around in Kara’s arms and returning the embrace in full. “It’s just unfair. I have to share you with the rest of the world every day, and the one time I get you all to myself, it ends up like this.”

 

Kara’s hands slid over Alex’s back. 

 

She didn’t know what to say.

 

-

 

The blanket nest on the ground was warm and comfortable, and Alex had done a pretty good job on the padding, so even her back was happy. She and Kara hadn’t tried to have sex again, and they’d spent the rest of the night reading and talking. 

 

It had been nice and it had done wonders for Alex’s mood. 

 

Now, they were both snuggled up with one another in front of the fireplace with Kara’s head pillowed on Alex’s chest. Her nose had stopped throbbing a while ago, even though Alex could still feel that it was hurt.

 

“This is nice,” Kara whispered, running her fingers over Alex’s chest. 

 

“Yeah,” Alex agreed, rubbing her hand up and down Kara’s arm. “We should’ve just done this from the beginning. Just lay down on the floor and not move.” Her arousal had waned some time ago, leaving her feeling sluggish and sleepy. 

 

“You’re not really thinking about going home tomorrow, are you?” Kara asked, splaying her fingers along Alex’s bare sternum. “Because you’re not the only one who has to share her girlfriend with the rest of the world, Agent Danvers.”

 

Turning her head to the side, Alex pressed a couple of kisses against Kara’s hair.

 

“No, not really,” she admitted, enjoying the feeling of Kara’s naked skin covering her own. “I’d gladly get myself hurt here for the next four days, if it means I get to spend some alone time with you.” She knew it sounded sappy, but it was the truth.

 

As Kara pushed herself up on her left arm, her hand slid from Alex’s sternum to her cheek.

 

“So brave,” she teased, leaning down and pressing their lips together.

 

Alex didn’t even try to sass her back.

 

In this moment, with Kara curled up against her in front of the fire, Alex was the happiest she’d ever been. Despite with the missing bed, the smarting nose, and the ruined sex. 

 

Because Kara was here, and Kara was hers.

 

Even though Alex was a little apprehensive about what the next four days would throw at her.

 

(She crossed her fingers for wild alligators in the frozen rivers and lakes. At least that would be entertaining.)

  
(No such luck.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they tried so hard to make it work !!! i hope their next 3 days turned out better haha we shall never know (i bet on day 2 they got a call from the DEO or smth)
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing :)
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	19. the end of the world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "BioShock AU" [Alex x Kara; Angst]
> 
> Summary: "The civil war is raging outside and neither Alex nor Kara know what to do."

“This stuff is lethal,” Alex grumbled as she poured the plasmid she’d tested back into a vial. She couldn’t believe something this untested and dangerous had been allowed on the market, even if Ryan believed that the great chain would take care of it eventually. The working-class people who had died or gone insane because of it certainly wouldn’t get to see this shift. “I know Fontaine pushed this through, but I can’t believe Ryan isn’t pulling it from the shelves.”

 

Kara sighed and leaned back in the chair she was sitting on.

 

“I tried to call Lucy yesterday, but I couldn’t get her on the phone,” she said, watching as Alex frowned down at the shimmering blue liquid in front of her. “Do you think she’s using this stuff?” She shuddered; she had no idea what she would do if her best friend turned into a splicer.

 

“I told her not to,” Alex grumbled, jotting down a few notes on her clipboard before pouring the contents of an EVE hypo into a test tube. “But if she  _ is  _ using plasmids, then I have even more reason to develop a stupid stabilizer before this whole place goes to hell in a handbasket.”

 

Sighing once more, Kara got to her feet and wrapped her arms around Alex’s stomach. Her wife was a brilliant scientist, which was why they had been recruited by Andrew Ryan to move down to Rapture in the first place - to the paradise under the sea.

 

Only it wasn’t a paradise, especially not since Fontaine Futuristics had brought plasmids to the market - faulty plasmids at that. Even Kara knew that playing with one’s genes could only end in disaster if done recklessly and incorrectly, and she didn’t have a fancy degree in something like bio-engineering.

 

She had seen some truly horrendous stuff over the last few months, and while she hoped that Alex  _ could  _ work out a cure, Kara doubted that their lives here would ever be the same again. Not when people could hurl fireballs from their hands and shoot lightning or bees out of various orifices.

 

Grumbling even louder, Alex picked up her pen and threw it against the wall.

 

Kara rolled her eyes gently, then walked over to retrieve it.

  
“This EVE hypo is laced with saline and water,” Alex murmured, accepting both the pen and a kiss from her wife. “You know what that means? Those poor bastards out on the street pay twenty-five dollars a pop for these things and they get less than half the promised product.”

 

Shaking her head, Kara took the test tube out of Alex’s hand and placed it carefully into the proper holder for it. Alex was going to worry herself to death if she didn’t take a break soon, and Kara would not let that happen. This problem - this civil war - had already taken enough from them all.

 

Even now that Fontaine was dead and gone, the people still rioted, and Ryan just sat by and let it happen. And yeah, sure, he wasn’t their king or their president, but he’d built this place. He had some responsibility to see to it that it didn’t eat itself alive. Kara had never truly believed in his speeches on the free market and the great chain, but now that push had come to shove, she couldn’t believe that Ryan had done nothing but seize Fontaine’s assets.

 

“You need a break, honey,” Kara whispered, softly kissing Alex once more. They’d come to Rapture to be free - to love without being judged, without being jailed by the United States government for being  _ queer _ . But maybe now it was time to leave. “You can’t keep doing this to yourself. You’re going to run yourself ragged trying to find a cure.”

 

Biting her bottom lip, Alex pressed her forehead against Kara’s shoulder.

 

“Seeing all of these people fall apart is the worst part about this,” Alex murmured, clutching Kara tightly to herself. “I can do something about it, Kara, I just need some more time.” Right now their apartment in Olympus Heights was still safe and had been mostly untouched by the war, but who knew how long that would last.

 

Atlas was still out there - stoking the divide between the rich and the poor. There was an outright class war going on out there, and neither Kara nor Alex wished to choose any one side. They’d both been brought up by working class families. The only reason they had Rapture dollars down here was because Alex held an important position at Ryan Industries, and Kara worked with Julie Langford on keeping their underwater gardens at Arcadia intact.

 

“We should leave,” Kara whispered, ever aware of the cameras that were placed all around the city. “It’s not worth it. We’re all going to die down here if we don’t get out soon. Ryan isn’t going to lift a finger to fix this.” 

 

Alex seemed unsure.

 

“I don’t know if we can,” she replied, leaning against the lab table with a look of terrible fatigue. “We would need a boat. Or some other means to get away from the lighthouse and the city. We would have to smuggle out a note and…”

 

Rubbing her face, Alex let out a breath of frustration.

 

“I’m sorry I brought you down here,” Alex whispered, placing her hands on her wife’s hips. “We should never have come.” Her eyes were shining with something akin to desperation and hopelessness, and Kara pulled Alex’s face against her chest.

 

“No way for us to be together openly on the surface,” Kara murmured into Alex’s hair. “No way for us to live down here at all if the civil war goes any further. This place is going to become a battleground. A graveyard under the sea.”

 

Alex shuddered.

 

“Maybe a bathysphere can take us to Iceland?” Kara suggested, desperately hoping they could find a way out of this living nightmare. If only they wouldn’t be returning to bigotry and hatred out in the real world, then maybe Kara wouldn’t have to feel so scared of both scenarios.

 

Pulling away and putting herself back on her feet, Alex straightened out her back and gave Kara another lingering kiss. They would endure this together, the way they had everything else. 

 

“I’ll keep trying to find a cure just in case, but maybe… maybe there is a way for us to leave.” She cupped Kara’s cheek and gave her a sad smile. “I love you so much, Kara.” Even if she had to give up herself, Alex would ensure that Kara would leave this place in one piece.

  
“I love you, too,” Kara replied, cradling Alex’s hand on her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BioShock AUs are super depressing lbr
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing!
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	20. dead or alive, dead or alive [Part 1]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Trusting" [Alex x Kara; Angst]
> 
> Summary: "Kara is dead. Alex doesn't know what to do."
> 
>  **NOTE:** This is hard angst where Kara dies BUT with a happy ending in part 2! Spoiler alert there will be a part 2. So, Warning for Major Character Death, but you guys know me. You know me. I'm not that cruel. You'll see! Give it a go.
> 
> **Graphic Depictions of Violence also CW: Vomit Mention.**

Kara was dead.

 

Kara.

 

Kara was dead.

 

Shivering on the floor of her apartment, Alex wrapped her arms around her legs and pressed her forehead to her knees. She was sitting behind the couch with a bottle of scotch next to her. The bottle was empty.

 

And Kara was dead.

 

The tears wouldn’t stop and Alex didn’t try to move.

 

Because Kara, the light of Alex’s life, was dead.

 

Gone.

 

Her phone had been blowing up with messages all night, but Alex couldn’t face anyone. Not J’onn with his broken look at having lost yet another daughter. Not Winn, who seemed to cry as much as she did. Not James, who was working around the clock to forget that Kara was gone. 

 

She wanted to smash something.

 

Clenching her teeth, Alex tried not to visualize how Kara had fought.

 

How she had struggled.

 

And how Cadmus had put a kryptonite bullet in her brain.

 

Suddenly nauseous, Alex pushed herself to her feet and staggered over to her bathroom. She barely made it inside when the vomit came. Kara’s face swam into her eyes as she hung over the toilet.

 

Kara on the ground.

 

Kara in her arms.

 

Kara dead.

 

Lifeless.

 

Gone.

 

Screaming in agony, Alex pushed herself away from the toilet and threw a punch against the tiled walls of her bathroom. She didn’t care about the pain that shot up her arm as her fingers cracked and bled.

 

She didn’t care about anything.

 

This wasn’t what Kara would have wanted for her. Alex knew that Kara would want her to go on, to continue doing their job, but how was Alex supposed to live without her sister? Without her soulmate? So what if they’d never spoken about it.

 

That didn’t make it any less true.

 

Rinsing out her mouth, Alex stared at herself in the mirror.

 

She looked like a mess.

 

Kara had died hours ago, and Alex hadn’t bothered to change out of the clothing she had worn during the battle. She was covered in blood, dust and debris. There were cuts and bruises on her face, too, but Alex hadn’t bothered to have them cleaned.

 

What was the point?

 

Flushing the toilet, Alex walked back out into the living room.

 

She needed to do something. Even in a world where nothing mattered, Alex needed to do  _ something  _ to make it right. Kara would have done anything for Alex. She would have died for Alex.

 

And she had.

 

Grabbing her keys, Alex stalked out of the apartment. Her neighbor startled when she walked past, but Alex didn’t pay him any attention. She had someone to talk to, and she wasn’t going to stop until she’d found them.

 

-

 

Sneaking into the DEO was almost too easy.

 

Everyone was mourning the death of Supergirl, and Alex didn’t have any problem whatsoever getting into their prison in the basement. Even the inmates seemed strangely somber. Alex tried not to think about her own bleeding, aching heart as she strolled through the corridors, looking for the door she knew she’d find at the very end. 

 

Kara was dead.

 

Kara was  _ dead _ .

 

Pushing through the final door, Alex stalked over to the only cell in this section. 

 

“Tell me where I can find the Lazarus Pit that brings people back from the dead,” Alex growled, placing both of her hands on the glass and staring down at the woman who was sitting in front of her. When the woman glanced up, she looked almost bored.

 

“Oh yes, I heard that your precious little Supergirl died,” she drawled, leaning back and studying Alex without even a hint of interest. “I’m sorry, but I can’t help you. There is no such thing.”

 

Pulling out her gun, Alex opened the cell and stepped inside before closing it behind herself.

 

“Tell me where I can find the Lazarus Pit that brings people back from the dead,” she repeated, grabbing the woman by the lapel and pressing the gun into her throat. Still, the woman seemed unperturbed.

 

“There is no such thing,” she said, staying completely relaxed. 

 

Alex screamed.

 

“If you don’t tell me what I want to know, I will shoot you.” Her hand closed around the woman’s throat. “And trust me, it’s going to be a while until I let anybody know that you’re bleeding out down here.”

 

Her nails dug into the woman’s skin, but she still barely blinked up at Alex.

 

_ Talia Al Ghul. _

 

What a waste of space and valuable resources.

 

Alex would be doing them a favor.

 

Hand shaking, Alex pulled her gun away from Talia’s throat and pointed it at her leg instead.

 

“You like walking, don’t you?” Alex hissed, pressing the muzzle down hard. “Tell me where I can find the Lazarus Pit that brings people back from the dead. I know you know where it is! Tell me!”

 

Talia smiled.

 

“You are very amusing,” she said, reaching up and patting Alex’s arm. “And the love you have for your sister is very sweet.” She coughed when Alex pressed down harder on her throat. “But I’m afraid I cannot tell you where the pit is.”

 

A clench of the jaw.

 

The alcohol pounding through her veins.

 

_ I’m sorry, Kara _ , Alex thought as she pulled the trigger.

 

Now it was Talia who screamed.

 

“Tell me,” Alex yelled at her, pointing the gun at her other leg. “Tell me or I swear to god I’ll cut off this leg with my goddamn fucking pocket knife.” Spit flew from her mouth, but Alex didn’t care. 

 

This was Kara.

 

_ Kara was dead _ .

 

“Tell me!” 

 

Another gunshot.

 

-

 

Covered in blood, Alex called down reinforcements to wrap up a bleeding Talia. Her colleagues stared at her as she hurried past them, but she barely paid them any mind. Even if the organization fired her over this, she didn’t care.

 

She didn’t.

 

The DEO didn’t matter.

 

Kara mattered.

 

Running up the stairs, Alex pushed past Winn, who called after her.

 

Her eyes blurred with tears as she reached their in-house morgue. Kara was still laid out on one of the tables, and Alex almost vomited all over again. Forcing herself to choke it down, Alex grabbed one of the body bags.

 

“What are you doing?” Winn asked her. He’d followed her - typical. “Alex, what the hell is going on? I just got a page that I’m supposed to send you to J’onn immediately if I see you? They’re saying you tortured a prisoner?”

 

Alex didn’t look at him as she pulled on Kara’s lifeless arm.

 

Winn gasped.

 

“Stop!” he cried, trying to surge forward and only stopping when Alex pulled her gun on him.

 

“I’m fixing this,” she hissed, waving him over to the other side of the morgue with her gun. “I don’t want to shoot you, Winn, but I will, if you try to stop me.” She swallowed hard. Winn had become almost like a brother to her.

 

“Who did you torture?” he asked, raising his hands in surrender.

 

“Someone who knows how to get Kara back,” she said firmly, dragging Kara onto the table with the open body bag. Feeling Kara’s coldness was horrifying. Kara wasn’t supposed to be cold. She was supposed to burn with life, always at least five degrees hotter than Alex.

 

“Get her… get her back?” Winn whispered, a look of terrible realization coming over his face. “You want to raise her from the dead. Oh my god.” He shook his head. “Alex, you can’t! That’s not what Kara would want! You don’t even know what that’s going to do to her!”

 

She clenched her jaw.

 

“I know she didn’t want to die!” she snapped at him, zipping up the body bag after placing a kiss on Kara’s forehead. Right next to the bullet hole that had ended her life without a second’s hesitation. “I am not losing my sister.”

 

New tears filled her eyes, but she wiped them away.

 

“I am going to  _ fix  _ her,” she growled, throwing the body bag over her shoulder. 

 

“You’re drunk,” he said, now clearly angry. “Put Kara down.”

 

Ignoring his words, Alex left the morgue. She was almost out; she just needed to get to her car and then she would be home free. She would go to the Lazarus Pit, she would put Kara inside, and Kara would be whole again.

 

Kara would be alive.

 

Winn followed her at a safe distance, but Alex didn’t care. She’d parked right next to the exit in the underground garage. No one was stopping her from saving her sister. Not her friends, not her colleagues, not her family.

 

Kara was her family.

 

Kara was her  _ life _ .

 

And Kara couldn’t be dead.

 

Alex couldn’t live without Kara.

 

The parking lot wasn’t empty, but Alex moved quickly through the shadows. As soon as she reached her car, she put Kara inside and closed the trunk. Pressing her hands against the back window of her car, Alex let a few tears trickle down her nose.

 

“I’ll fix you, Kara. I’ll fix it,” she whispered. Her shoulders were shaking and she could feel the effects of the scotch. She’d managed to drive to the DEO just fine, but she had a much longer route ahead of her now.

 

When she turned around, she jumped.

 

J’onn was there.

 

“Don’t,” she said, keeping one of her hands on the back window. “Don’t try to stop me.”

 

He shook his head.

 

“Kara wouldn’t want this,” he said slowly, making no move to intercept her or close the distance between them. “She’s at peace, Alex, don’t you see?” His hands were up, and she could feel the devastation oozing out of each and every single one of his pores.

 

But he didn’t understand.

 

How could he.

 

“Kara didn’t deserve this,” Alex growled, inching closer to her car door. “It was supposed to be me. It was supposed to be me! I was supposed to protect her! Me!” She was crying for real now, big heavy drops of water dripping onto the concrete floor. “She’s not at peace.”

 

He took a step forward and she raised her gun.

 

“Don’t,” she said, her entire body shaking with grief. “Don’t make me lose both of you.”

 

With a shake of his head, he took a step back again. 

 

“You will regret this for the rest of your life,” he said, lowering his hands. “When I lost my wife, I would have given anything for her to come back. Trust me, I know how you’re feeling right now. It should have been me instead of her. Why did I survive when she didn’t.” His face was marred with pain. “But we don’t get to choose who lives or dies, Alex.”

 

She wiped her face one more time.

 

“This is  _ Kara _ , J’onn,” she said slowly, emphasizing every word. “ _ Kara _ is dead.”

 

He nodded.

 

“I know.” 

 

Slipping into the car, she locked the doors and turned the key in the ignition. Before she could leave, J’onn was in the passenger seat. 

 

“Get out,” she growled, reaching for her gun again.

 

“I’m not going to let you do this alone,” J’onn rumbled, placing his hand over hers. “I know I can’t make you stop. It’s going to kill you, too, if you don’t do this. But you have to face the consequences of what you’re doing. She might not be the Kara you knew when you bring her back.”

 

She pulled out of his grip and peeled out of her parking space.

 

“I love Kara. In any form,” she whispered, taking them out of the DEO and into the unknown.

 

-

 

The drive took them a couple of hours. 

 

Plenty of time for Alex to sober up.

 

She and J’onn didn’t speak during the trip, and Alex was more than fine with that. Her brain couldn’t form a coherent thought beyond  _ bring Kara back _ .  _ Save Kara. Help Kara.  _ It was selfish, really.

 

Maybe Kara was at peace.

 

Or maybe she had simply died.

 

Maybe there really was no heaven.

 

Maybe she was waiting for Alex to get her.

 

When they stopped, Alex relieved herself in the woods before coming back and opening up the trunk. J’onn was standing next to her, and when he tried to reach down to grab Kara, Alex glared at him.

 

“I’ll carry her,” she said, pulling Kara over her shoulder once more.

 

She wished she were still drunk.

 

“We can still go back,” J’onn offered quietly, watching her with sad, tired eyes. “You don’t have to do this, Alex. Kara would understand.” He reached out for her again and she walked away from him.

 

Now that she wasn’t drunk anymore, it was getting harder and harder not to fall into J’onn’s arms and sob until her body was as dry and dead as Kara’s. Again, she tasted bile. And again, she swallowed it down.

 

Kara was dead.

 

But not for much longer.

 

In between screams of agony, Talia had told her how to find the Lazarus Pit and how to get inside the cave where it was located. As she made her way there now, Alex wished desperately for another bottle of scotch. If she were drunk, all of this wouldn’t be so goddamn difficult.

 

She was surprised that J’onn had even let her drive out here - considering how drunk she’d actually been - but maybe he’d figured that he could intervene if she somehow fucked up behind the wheel. And the fact that he hadn’t simply used his telepathy and his other powers to knock her out showed that he knew how serious she was.

 

There was simply no universe in which Alex wouldn’t try to save Kara any way she could.

 

No matter how long it would have taken her, Alex would have gotten Kara’s body eventually. She suspected that J’onn was well-aware of this. And even though Alex respected him and his opinion, she knew he was wrong.

 

Yes, Kara would be angry with her.

 

Yes, she would undoubtedly yell at Alex for changing the course of her fate.

 

But then she would realize that she would have done the same for Alex, and they would be at exactly the same spot they’d always been. Together, realizing how much they loved each other, and how impossible it was to put their connection into words.

 

The body bag weighed her down considerably as she climbed down a narrow ledge to enter the cave. It took her a couple of tries to find proper purchase, but once she was on solid ground again, she could have sworn she could already feel the power of the pit.

 

“You’ll be back soon, Kara,” Alex murmured to her sister, holding on tightly as she made her way through the dark cave. Her flashlight lit the way, and a couple of seconds later, J’onn’s flashlight joined in as well. “I love you.”

 

They walked for a good ten minutes.

 

When they finally reached the Lazarus pit, Alex turned off her flashlight and placed it on the ground. Down here, she wouldn’t need it. The pit emitted plenty of light on its own, giving the walls a green glow. Right next to it, she placed her gun and her cellphone. Then her car keys followed by her wallet.

 

“I asked Talia how it works,” Alex murmured, gently putting down Kara’s body bag. “I’ll go in there with her, and I need to submerge us all the way.” She unzipped the bag slowly, Kara’s face looking even more lifeless in the green light. “I love you, Kara.”

 

“Alex…” J’onn said, looking on as Alex unfurled Kara from the bag. “This isn’t the way.”

 

“It’s the only way I have,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around Kara’s back and pulling her up. She would save Kara, no matter the consequences. And if Kara came back strangely, then Alex would love her even more to make up for the rest. 

 

Getting to her feet, Alex pressed a kiss against Kara’s temple.

 

Moving slowly, Alex placed her foot on the first step that led directly into the pool.

 

Watching in stony silence, J’onn crossed his arms over his chest, but Alex hardly spared him a glance. Her eyes were fixed on Kara’s face. The further Alex waded into the pool, the more she expected Kara to miraculously open her eyes.

 

She knew it wouldn’t happen until they were under the water, but Alex still watched her sister with rapt attention for any twitch or movement. 

 

She was up to her waist in water by the time she’d reached the middle of the pool. Kara’s hair was floating all around her face, giving her the impression of a ghostly angel as she lay in Alex’s arms.

 

The House of El crest had a speck of blood on it, and Alex wiped it away.

 

“I’m here for you,” Alex breathed, pulling Kara closer. “I will always be here for you.”

 

Holding her breath, Alex bent down on her knees and submerged them both completely in the Lazarus Pit. Talia hadn’t specified how long they were supposed to stay under, so she held out for as long as her lungs would let her.

 

As soon as she reached the surface, Alex expected Kara to sputter back to life.

 

Like she hadn’t been dead at all.

 

When nothing happened, Alex cupped Kara’s cheek and turned it from side to side. 

 

Ice cold.

 

“No,” she whispered, gently slapping Kara’s cheek. “No, Kara. Kara.” She carefully shook Kara’s body. “Kara, wake up. Kara.” She shook her again. “Kara, I need you to wake up for me.” The bullet hole was still there, and Alex’s eyes filled with tears once more. “Kara, no… No, Kara. Kara, please wake up.  _ Please _ .”

 

But Kara didn’t wake up.

 

Kara was dead.

 

“No, no, no, no, no,” Alex whimpered, pressing her face against Kara’s chest and holding her close. “Please, Kara, don’t leave me. Don’t leave me.” She shuddered around Kara’s body, her nails digging into the fabric of the heavy cape. “I need you, please. Please, Kara. I need you. I love you.”

 

Her crying turned into sobbing.

 

Then, something strange happened.

 

Warmth spread through every cell in Alex’s body, and a blinding light surrounded both her and Kara. It was so bright that Alex had to squeeze her eyes shut for fear of going blind. What she felt next was even weirder.

 

She was wet one moment and the next she was dry.

 

One second, she was standing in the pool of water, the next she was standing… in National City? It took her eyes a couple of seconds to adjust to the darkness of the night, but when they did, Alex turned in a circle to confirm where she was.

 

It was definitely National City.

 

Frowning, Alex realized that she wasn’t in her bloody and torn clothing anymore. Instead, she was wearing jeans and a dark grey t-shirt under one of her black leather jackets. Her wallet was in her back pocket and her cellphone was tucked into her jacket.

 

None of this made sense.

 

Where was Kara? Where was J’onn?

 

Turning one more time, Alex barely had time to react before a bulky man with a ski mask over his face came thundering out of the alley that she was standing in front of. He was holding a gun, and Alex’s first instinct was to take him down.

 

It didn’t take much.

 

A couple of kicks to some of his soft spots, followed by a blow to the head that made him drop like a sack of potatoes. She would’ve confiscated his gun and zip-tied him, if a red and blue shadow hadn’t come shooting out of the alley before she could move again.

 

“Oh, hey, you took him down,” the shadow said, floating a few inches above the ground before setting down next to Alex, who could only stare at the side of her face. “I was looking forward to that myself, but thanks, I guess.”

 

_ Kara _ .

 

Kara was  _ alive _ .

 

It took Alex all of three seconds to jerk forward and wrap her arms around Kara’s neck, holding her tightly. She was crying even more now, but this time they were happy tears, and she dug her fingers into Kara’s cape all over again.

 

“I got you back,” she murmured, squeezing Kara even closer. “I got you back.”

 

She was warm and solid and  _ alive _ .

 

“Um…” Kara said, softly patting Alex’s back. “Not to be rude or anything, but… do I know you?” When Alex pulled away, the look of confusion marring Kara’s face almost made Alex’s knees buckle. 

 

“Kara, it’s me,” she whispered, ignoring the startled and scared look on Kara’s face. 

 

“How do you know my name?” Kara asked, immediately grabbing Alex by the wrists. “Who do you work for? Is Max Lord trying to intimidate me again, because you can tell him that it’s not going to work!”

 

Alex didn’t even care that her wrists were hurting.

 

“Kara, look at me,” Alex pleaded, looking deeply into her sister’s eyes. “It’s me. It’s Alex.” 

 

When Kara shook her head, the world seemed to crumble around Alex.

 

But only for a moment.

 

Because whatever happened next.

  
At least Kara was alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See you all in Part 2 tomorrow! Please don't yell at me too much xoxo
> 
> all mistakes are mine
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	21. dead or alive, dead or alive [Part 2]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Perplexed" [Alex x Kara; Angst] 
> 
> Summary: "Alex doesn't know why Kara doesn't remember her."

Alex’s brain was reeling with questions.

 

Her encounter with Kara (she was alive, alive, alive) had left her confused and bewildered more than anything else. Had the Lazarus Pit somehow taken Kara’s memories of her as payment? If that was the case, Alex would gladly take that price if it meant Kara would be alright.

 

Kara was  _ alive _ .

 

Now, Alex was sitting in one of the holding cells at the DEO.

 

She hadn’t exactly been thrilled about that, but since Kara didn’t know who she was, Alex understood why the fact that she knew Kara’s real identity made her sister so suspicious. J’onn would be able to clear up this little mishap in no time.

 

“She says that she’s my sister and that she knows me and that she works for you,” Kara said as she made her way back towards Alex’s cell. J’onn was next to her, and he looked the same as he always did. Only, when he looked at Alex… his eyes didn’t crinkle with fondness. “Do you know her?”

 

Getting to her feet, Alex slipped her hands into her pockets.

 

“No,” J’onn replied, making Alex feel as though the ground was shaking beneath her feet.

 

“This isn’t funny, J’onn,” Alex protested, placing her hands on the glass. “I know you don’t agree with what I’ve done, but this was the right decision and you know it!” She glared at him fiercely and he furrowed his brows in confusion and suspicion.

 

“How do you know that name?” he asked, completely missing the point.

 

“Let me out of this damn cell,” she demanded, slapping her hands against the thick glass. “It worked, didn’t it? Kara’s fine, J’onn. Kara’s alive!” Her chest ached and her hands were trembling. Kara was alive.

 

Kara was alive.

 

That was all that mattered.

 

“How do you know Supergirl’s identity?” J’onn asked. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, but you need to tell me who the hell you are and what you want from us.” He seemed genuinely angry now, and Alex wondered if maybe she’d been reading the situation all wrong.

 

Did everyone forget who she was?

 

Or was it only the people who had been with her when she’d taken Kara into the pool?

 

“My name is Alex Danvers. I work for the DEO. You were the one who recruited me, J’onn.” She pulled her wallet out of her pocket (Kara really needed to learn to take belongs away from her prisoners). Pulling out her DEO-issued ID, she watched as J’onn’s expression darkened even further. “I went into a Lazarus Pit to save Kara’s life and I think it took your memories of me as a sort of cruel payment.”

 

Frowning, J’onn stared down at the ID.

 

Kara was staring at Alex with a mixture of perplexity and worry. 

 

“Tell me something only I would know,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest. 

 

Alex didn’t even have to think about it.

 

“Your mother used to sing you a human lullaby to get you to sleep,” she said, stuffing the DEO ID back into her wallet. “She spent a couple of weeks down here to observe our behavior when she was your age, and she fell in love with it.”

 

“I could never figure out which one it was…” Kara whispered, biting her bottom lip.

 

“It’s  _ Hush Little Baby _ ,” Alex said automatically, asking herself if Kara had forgotten the name of the song because the memory involved Alex. “I helped you find it when you were fifteen. We listened to lullabies until you recognized some of the lyrics.”

 

“But how…” Kara shook her head and rubbed her temples. “How can you  _ know  _ this?”

 

Alex sighed.

 

“I told you. I went to a Lazarus Pit and I think it took your memories of me.” She rubbed her face and sat down on the small bench inside the cell. “I don’t know how it happened. One moment, you were floating in my arms and the next… I was in that street.”

 

Those Pits were even more dangerous than Alex had realized.

 

“You’re saying I was dead? Fatally wounded?” Kara’s expression was one of terror, and Alex suddenly didn’t want to say any more. She didn’t want to tell Kara how awful it had been. How much everyone had suffered. How Kara had died.

 

“You…” Alex put her face in her hands. “You died.”

 

“But how is that possible?” J’onn interjected. “Lazarus Pits don’t have the power to rewrite history. Not like that.” He opened up the cell and pulled Alex to her feet, his hands around her biceps. “What happened to Kara?”

 

Alex didn’t try to struggle.

  
“Cadmus.” Her lip quivered. “They killed her.”

 

He frowned.

 

“Cadmus?” When he looked to Kara for any sign that she knew what the hell Alex was talking about, Alex was surprised to see Kara shake her head. “Who are these Cadmus people? If they want to hurt Kara, I need to know about it.”

 

That made even less sense. For the Pit to remove their memories of Alex she could understand, but for it to also erase Cadmus? What else had it taken? And what if J’onn was correct, what if the Pit  _ didn’t  _ have this kind of power?

 

Was Alex dreaming?

 

No, no.

 

Kara was alive.

 

Kara had to be alive.

 

“Let go of me and I’ll explain it to you,” she said, shaking out her shoulders when he dropped her back onto her own feet. Kara was looking at her strangely, which also made sense. Hearing about your own death couldn’t be pleasant.

 

But Kara was alive now.

 

She would get over her shock.

 

“Can we go upstairs? I want to see if any of the others know who I am.” She could tell that J’onn still didn’t trust her, but he nodded and led the way. Walking next to Kara, Alex snuck glances at her sister out of the corner of her eye.

 

She looked good. 

 

Healthy.

 

_ Alive _ .

 

When Kara caught her eyes, Alex didn’t look away.

 

“I love you,” Alex whispered. It was strange to see Kara’s reaction to her words - a blush. “I know you don’t know me, but I know you. You can trust me. I would never do anything to hurt you, Kara.”

 

It was Kara who looked away first.

 

-

 

“Where’s Winn?” Alex wondered as they entered the command center. They were in the desert base (which Alex had known as soon as they’d left the holding cells), and Vasquez was sitting where they usually sat. In front of the big screen. 

 

“Winn?” Kara asked, scrunching up her face. “He’s at CatCo.”

 

Furrowing her brows, Alex looked around herself.

 

“Why?” Not having him around was kind of unpleasant. Alex had grown so used to his presence that his sudden absence actually made her miss him. Her feelings were already all over the place, and Alex’s desire to take Kara’s hand grew ever greater.

 

“He’s… at work,” Kara said, shaking her head. “You said you know us, but…”

 

“In my timeline, he quit his job to come and work for the DEO. We recruited him after he helped us.” All of this was wrong. All of this was so wrong. This wasn’t her world. “Can you run a scan to find me? I want to know where the Lazarus Pit put me.”

 

“Agent Vasquez,” J’onn barked, giving Alex another calculating look. “Run a scan to find out if there is an Alex Danvers in National City or anywhere else in the immediate vicinity.” His arms were crossed over his chest.

 

Vasquez complied instantly, and Alex wondered if anyone here would recognize her.

 

“Alex Danvers...” Vasquez mumbled, staring up at the large screen. “I have an Alex Danvers who…” But they didn’t need to continue speaking. Alex could see it plain as day on the big screen.

 

Alex Danvers.

 

Parents: Eliza and Jeremiah Danvers.

 

Deceased.

 

“I died when I was a baby,” Alex whispered, staring open-mouthed at the information in front of her. “I… I never existed here.” She faltered, and it was only Kara’s strong grip that steadied her. “But why am I here, if it killed me to save you?”

 

Kara was alive.

 

That  _ was  _ all that mattered.

 

“I don’t know,” Kara said, holding Alex upright. “Eliza and Jeremiah never told me that they had a daughter before Kal took me to them.” Her face was marred with pain - pain for Alex and her situation. “I’m sorry I can’t remember you.”

 

“It’s not your fault,” Alex said, finally regaining her composure. “I made this choice, and I’m prepared to live with the consequences.” Straightening up, Alex shook out her shoulders and ran a hand through her hair. “I just need a moment.”

 

Stalking out of the room, Alex took a route that was so familiar she barely even needed to look where she was going. In a matter of minutes, she was up on the roof under the hot desert sun. When she looked around, she realized that there wasn’t a bench anywhere in sight.

 

It made sense, of course.

 

She’d been the one to lug it up here in the first place.

 

No her, no bench.

 

Sitting down on the floor, Alex put her head in her hands.

 

She was dead.

 

She was dead, but she was here.

 

Talia hadn’t said anything about this little side effect. She’d known that the pool held magical properties, but this? This was beyond anything Alex could have anticipated. She’d gladly have given her life for Kara - and apparently, she had.

 

Just not in the way that Alex had anticipated.

 

It didn’t take Kara long to find her.

 

“Are you alright?” she asked, taking a seat next to Alex. “This must be a lot to take in for you. It is for me.” She tapped her fingers on the roof and gave off a small sigh. “We must have been pretty close for you to… to do this for me.”

 

Alex looked away.

 

“I told you,” she said, pulling her knees to her chest. “I love you.”

 

Kara sighed.

 

“What I don’t get is why I’m still here,” Alex whispered, wrapping her arms around her legs. “If the Pit erased me from the world, why put me back here? No one would have been the wiser. I would’ve just been blinked out of existence.”

 

Nodding, Kara studied Alex’s features.

 

“I wish I could tell you the answer,” she replied gently, reaching out with her hand and touching Alex’s fingers. She was warm. Warm and  _ alive _ . Not at all how she’d felt when Alex had pulled her into the bodybag. 

 

“You’re alive,” Alex murmured to herself, “that’s all that matters.”

 

_ Even if you don’t know who I am.  _

 

_ Even if you don’t remember how much I love you. _

 

_ And how much you love me _ .

 

“I wish I could remember you.” Kara’s voice was full of pain and longing. “You did this amazing thing for me and I don’t even know how to repay you for it.” She held on tightly, even when Alex tried to pull away her hand. “We can fix this. We’ll make new memories and you can tell me about how we grew up together.”

 

“I’d like that,” Alex said, meaning every word. Having this Kara would be better than having no Kara at all. Alex couldn’t live in a world where Kara didn’t exist. Where Kara didn’t love her. “Thank you for trusting me.”

 

Kara smiled softly.

 

“I can see it,” she said, a sad expression crossing her features. “When you look at me. How much you care.” 

 

Alex didn’t make a comment about Kara’s assessment.

 

There was nothing left to add.

 

-

 

Alex’s new apartment felt strange, like it wasn’t quite her own.

 

It wasn’t, of course. When she’d tried to see if her old apartment was available, she’d seen that the building she’d lived in no longer existed. It had been turned into a parking garage, and Alex tried not to take that personally.

 

Instead, Kara had informed her that one of the apartments in her building had recently been vacated, and had gently suggested to Alex that she might like to live close to Kara. To help their relationship grow back into what it had been before.

 

Kara’s face had looked so hopeful that Alex hadn’t been able to say no.

 

So now, she lived two floors down from Kara.

 

From Kara, who was alive and well.

 

Thriving, in fact.

 

She had friends, she had a good job, she was Supergirl. Almost like she’d never needed Alex for any of those things at all. Except, there was one thing that Kara didn’t have, and Alex noticed that during the second week of her new life.

 

“You and James aren’t together?” Alex asked, looking down at a picture of Kara, James and Winn all standing together. Kara was flanked by the boys, an arm wrapped around each of their necks.

 

“James? No, why would I be with James?” She furrowed her brows. “Was I with James in your timeline?” The perplexity on her face made Alex wonder what had changed in this universe with her absence that had kept Kara from going after James. “He’s like a brother to me.”

 

“You wanted to be with him, but it didn’t work out,” Alex commented, putting the picture back on the shelf. “Is there anyone else in your life that you want to date?” Asking Kara this question was weird, now that they barely knew each other.

 

“No,” Kara said matter-of-factly. “With my job as Supergirl and with the DEO secrecy, I don’t think dating would work out for me very well.” She smiled at Alex. “It’s alright, though. Maybe I’ll just date one of the agents there. That would fix at least one of my problems.”

 

Humming noncommittally, Alex sat down on the couch next to Kara.

 

“I’m sure you’ll find someone. You’re great,” Alex said, staring at one of the paintings on Kara’s wall. It was the exact same one as the one Kara had had before. It still freaked her out how much of the world had stayed exactly the same without her. 

 

“What about you? Did the Pit blink your significant other out of existence?” Kara asked tentatively. They barely spoke about all the things Alex had lost. Kara hadn’t even asked her about her parents, yet.

 

Alex had no idea how she was supposed to tell her mother that she was the baby she’d lost almost thirty years ago. That conversation would most likely not go over very well - for either of them. Though she knew that she would have to talk to her mother at some point, Alex didn’t want to think about that right now. 

 

“There wasn’t anyone,” Alex said, wondering how Maggie was doing. If she was still with Kate in this timeline. Alex hoped that she was - Maggie deserved happiness almost as much as Kara did. “It’s fine, though. I always had you.”

 

And that unspoken  _ thing  _ between them that Alex had been too afraid to address.

 

“It sounds like I took up a lot of your time,” Kara whispered, looking down at her knees. “Was there ever… I mean…” She glanced up at Alex for a second. “You’re just…” She scuffed her socked feet on the carpet. “Were we…”

 

Alex sighed.

 

“We never talked about it.” She leaned back against the couch and let out a slow breath. “I always thought it would be easier for you, if I didn’t say anything.” Her hands curled into fists. “I’m sorry.”

 

“Why are you apologizing?” Reaching out, Kara placed her hand on Alex’s thigh.

 

Alex couldn’t forget the feeling of cold, dead skin.

 

Even now.

 

“I was a coward,” Alex whispered. “I should have tried to make it work.”

 

Getting to her feet, Alex shrugged off the feeling of failure.

 

It was too late now, anyway.

 

-

 

Even a month into the new timeline, Alex still didn’t feel normal in any way, shape, or form. Sure, her colleagues treated her as one of their own again, but they didn’t remember the history she had with them.

 

J’onn didn’t know her the way she knew him, even if he’d stopped looking at her with suspicion in his eyes. Now, she was just one more agent to him. 

 

It was hard.

 

But nothing was more difficult than seeing that look of longing in Kara’s eyes.

 

Alex told herself that it was fine.

 

That it didn’t matter.

 

That the only thing that mattered was that Kara was alive and well.

 

It was getting more and more difficult, though.

 

She still didn’t regret her decision, and if she’d been faced with the same problem again, she would have made the same choice in a heartbeat. Just as she knew Kara would have. Because that was their thing, wasn’t it?

 

Except now…

 

It wasn’t.

 

Kara tried, but Alex knew her too well.

 

When she looked at Alex, she didn’t see the sister that had sacrificed her life in order to save her. She saw someone else - someone completely different. And Alex wasn’t sure she could live with that knowledge.

 

-

 

Two months in, things changed.

 

Kara and Alex were watching a Netflix show that Alex had seen a million times before, and Kara was snuggled up in her arms. They’d gradually gone back to touching each other in a more comfortable manner, and Alex tried to ignore how that level of closeness made her feel.

 

Kara was alive.

 

Kara was alive.

 

Kara was alive.

 

The thought ran like a mantra through her mind.

 

“You said that we never talked about our feelings,” Kara murmured suddenly, looking away from the screen. “I don’t think you were a coward. I never talked to you about it, either, from the looks of it.”

 

Alex sighed.

 

“There was just too much going on,” Alex said, rubbing her hand on her jeans. “And I guess we both thought we’d have more time to figure it all out.” And then Kara had died. She’d died right in front of Alex.

 

And Alex hadn’t even gotten to say goodbye.

 

Pulling her thoughts away from that moment, Alex focused on Kara’s warmth.

 

The sound of her breathing.

 

She was alive.

 

She was different, but she was alive.

 

That had to be enough.

 

“We have all the time in the world now,” Kara observed, turning onto her side so she could look more directly at Alex. “I know it’s not the same for you, because you knew me before, but I really like you, Alex. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”

 

Alex pulled away from her.

 

“Kara…” She rubbed her face. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

 

“Why?” Kara scooted closer. “I’m still me. I’m still Kara.”

 

Heart pumping rapidly in her chest, Alex brought her fingers to her sister’s cheek. No, not her sister.  _ Kara _ . When her hand made contact, Kara closed her eyes and leaned in halfway, expecting for Alex to meet her.

 

“Just one kiss,” she whispered, feeling so warm and alive under Alex’s touch.

 

It was so tempting.

 

But…

 

“I’m sorry,” Alex whispered, shaking her head and pulling away. “But you’re not my Kara.” Getting to her feet, she wrapped her hands around her stomach. “I’m happy you’re alive and I’m always going to be there for you, but it’s not the same.”

 

When Kara’s eyes opened again, they stared at Alex.

 

But they were…

 

Green.

 

“Well done, Alexandra Danvers,” Kara said in a voice that wasn’t her own.

 

Then, everything went black.

 

-

 

With a gasp, Alex broke through the surface of the Lazarus Pit. 

 

Her arms were shaking, her heart pounding, and the woman in her arms was…

 

“Alex?” Kara whispered, a look of perplexity coming over her features. There was no bullet hole. “Alex? Where are we? Why am I wet? What happened?” Kara’s body was warm and Alex wasted no time with wrapping her up in a fierce hug.

 

Tears spilled over her eyes.

 

“I got you back,” she murmured, gripping Kara’s back and holding her close. “I got you back.” Kara’s hands curled around her shoulders, and Alex pulled away long enough to press her lips against Kara’s in a fierce, desperate kiss. “I love you so much, Kara.”

 

That didn’t seem to lessen Kara’s confusion.

 

“I love you, too, Alex, but… How did we get here?” She looked around herself. “The last thing I remember is…” She furrowed her brows and brought a hand to her forehead. Her thumb circled the place where the bullet hole had been. “I was…”

 

“You’re alive,” Alex whispered, pulling Kara into another kiss. “And you’re my Kara.”

 

Before either one of them could say another word, J’onn’s voice reached them.

 

“Everything alright? You were under the water for a while.” He sounded beyond worried, and Alex supposed to she should go and tell him about the weird… dream? Hallucination? Altered reality? Pocket dimension? That she’d stumbled into.

 

“We’re good,” Alex called back, helping Kara stand on her own two feet. “We’re all good.”

 

Wrapping her arms around Kara’s body, Alex held her close.

 

She didn’t ever want to let go again.

 

Kara was alive.

 

And she was herself.

  
“Let’s go home,” Kara said, holding on tightly to Alex’s back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well that was a thing that happened. hope you enjoyed!
> 
> all mistakes are mine!
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	22. the power of the media

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Appalled" [Alex x Kara; Fluff]
> 
> Summary: "Kara is pissed at the media outlets for being more interested in her sex life than her superhero career."

“I can’t believe they’re doing this,” Kara grumbled, picking up the newspaper in front of her and shoving it in Alex’s face. While Alex generally wasn’t in favor of having objects thrust directly into her line of vision, she appreciated it even less when she was trying to eat her breakfast. “I’ve been at this for a single day. A _single_ day.”

 

Pulling the newspaper out of her face, Alex put down her bagel and looked down at the headline.

 

_Supergirl: The Perfect Match for the Man of Steel?_

 

Raising one eyebrow, Alex shrugged her shoulders.

 

“This was bound to happen when you outed yourself,” Alex said, folding the newspaper in half and placing it on the kitchen island before going back to her breakfast. She didn’t want her coffee to get cold.

 

“He’s my cousin!” Kara said, clearly appalled.

 

“They don’t know that,” Alex replied, taking a bite from her bagel.

 

Kara was almost vibrating with anger in her seat.

 

“I can’t believe that that’s the only thing they have to say about me! I saved that boat full of children yesterday and all they care about is who I’m sleeping with?” She glared at the newspaper so hard that Alex was afraid it would burst into flames.

 

Shrugging, Alex put her chin in her hand.

 

“People suck,” she said, softly kicking Kara’s shin. “And they’re sexist as fuck, too.”

 

Scowling, Kara grabbed the newspaper and threw it in the trash.

 

“Thanks. I didn’t want to read that, anyway,” Alex commented sarcastically, taking a sip of her coffee. “Look, as soon as people get wind of the fact that you’re related, the gross stories about you and Clark are going to stop. I wouldn’t worry about it.”

 

With a big sigh, Kara wrapped her arms around Alex.

 

-

 

“Oh my god,” Kara yelled, making Alex jump to her feet and run into the living room. She’d been folding laundry in Kara’s bedroom (since Kara was busy with some last-minute assistant work for Cat Grant).

 

“What? What’s wrong?” Alex asked, frantically looking around for a target to hit.

 

“Come and look at this!” Waving her over, Kara indicated to her laptop. “This is so infuriating. I don’t even know what to say.” Scowling, she scooted to the left so Alex could sit down next to her and look at the screen. “I think I’m going to be sick.”

 

Alex read the headline.

 

_Supergirl: Max Lord’s Latest Handmaiden?_

 

This time, Alex could understand the disgust on Kara’s face perfectly.

 

“They do know he hates your guts, right?” Alex asked, scrolling down the page in an effort to find out what these writers had been thinking. She shook her head. “Looks like they think his outspokenness about how terrible you are is actually a ruse.”

 

Kara mimed vomiting motions.

 

“This is disgusting,” Kara whispered, trying to slam down the lid of the laptop. Fearing for yet another electronic being broken around Kara, Alex moved herself and the computer out of the way before Kara could make contact. “They’re delusional! This is defamation!”

 

“Actually in print form it’s libel,” Alex said, closing the laptop gently and setting it down on the coffee table. “Did you learn nothing from the first _Spiderman_?”

 

Huffing, Kara crossed her arms over her chest.

 

“Why can’t they ever pair me up with any _nice_ people? Or people who aren’t related to me?” TIpping to the side, she muttered quietly under her breath. She only stopped when Alex sat back down again and rubbed her waist.

 

“Because nice and healthy relationships don’t sell copies, Kara,” Alex explained patiently, gently patting Kara’s leg. “I think this moment is calling out for some ice cream to soothe the pain.” Secretly, Alex was glad that _she_ hadn’t been the one to be romantically linked to Lord.

 

His creepy advances were bad enough.

 

-

 

“You have _got_ to be kidding me!” Kara’s voice carried all way through the DEO desert base, making Alex sigh and rub her temples. She’d been so close to figuring out this formula, and now her concentration was broken.

 

Getting up from her desk chair, Alex followed the disgusted noises that Kara was making all the way from her lab to the training room. Inside, Kara was standing around in the middle of the platform with her phone held in her hand.

 

“What happened?” Alex asked, stuffing her hands into her white lab coat.

 

“Look at this,” Kara said, stalking over and showing Alex the web page she’d been looking at.

 

Alex squinted down at the tiny text.

 

_Supergirl: James Olsen’s Latest Superfling?_

 

The article showed a picture of James and Supergirl smiling at one another.

 

Nothing else.

 

“Wow, they’re really reaching now.” Alex handed back the phone. “There’s probably going to be an article about you and an inanimate object next.” She could tell that Kara was very close to exploding, and Alex was mildly relieved that the kryptonite setting was set to a level that wouldn’t allow for heat vision.

 

“These titles aren’t even clever!” Kara’s entire body was shaking with rage. It had been a couple of months now since she’d started saving people and the media still seemed to be more interested in who she was sleeping with.

 

Nevermind the fact that Alex was pretty sure that Kara wasn’t sleeping with anybody.

 

Sighing, Alex wrapped her arms around her sister’s body and held her close.

 

“They’re going to run out of potential partners for you soon enough,” she whispered, relieved when Kara hugged her back. “Don’t even listen to them. You’ve been doing excellent work.” Her nails dragged up and down Kara’s back.

 

“Thanks,” Kara murmured, pressing her cheek against Alex’s shoulder.

 

-

 

“I should have probably seen this coming at some point,” Kara said tiredly as she slid the tablet over to Alex. They were sitting at Noonan’s and Kara had just been catching up on world events when this headline had popped out at her.

 

Alex barely glanced at it.

 

 _Supergirl: Cat Grant Wears the Pants_.

 

“This is so darn heterosexist,” Kara mumbled, sipping on her milkshake and stuffing a piece of sticky bun into her mouth. “And it’s not even original. And just because I wear a skirt to work doesn’t mean I should be taken any less seriously.”

 

Nodding, Alex shut off the tablet and wiped gently at the side of Kara’s mouth.

 

“I know, Kara,” she said, taking a bite of her own sandwich.

 

“I’m surprised they considered Cat to be a viable love interest for me at all.” Shaking her head, Kara turned the tablet back on and looked down at the picture of Cat wearing a pair of black satin pants. “Maybe they can’t envision a woman in power as anything other than masculine.”

 

“Probably,” Alex agreed, cutting off a piece of her sandwich and placing it on Kara’s plate.

 

“I know I shouldn’t be upset about this, but it’s just so ridiculous. I saved so many lives yesterday, and yet this is what gets put on the front page. It’s--” She grimaced and stuffed yet more of the sticky bun into her mouth.

 

“Appalling? Shitty? Terrible?” Alex suggested, playfully kicking Kara’s feet under the table.

 

“All of those things,” Kara agreed, her cheeks stuffed full of food, which made her resemble a chipmunk quite strongly. The sight was adorable and Alex had to bite back a grin. Kara probably wouldn’t be very receptive to being teased right now.

 

Giving Kara a sympathetic look, Alex grabbed her hand.

 

“Don’t even think about it, Kara. You’re better than all of them.”

 

When Kara smiled, Alex’s heart skipped a beat.

 

-

 

“Oh come on, he was here for _one_ day!”

 

Groaning tiredly, Alex pushed herself up her elbows.

 

“Kara, it’s three AM, why are you awake?” she asked, rubbing her hand over her face. They’d had another one of their sleepovers, and Alex usually slept like a baby when Kara was around. She was like Alex’s own personal hot water bottle.

 

“I got hungry,” Kara explained, indicating the half-eaten box of snowcaps on her bedside table. “I just wanted to check my social media feeds.” She turned the phone on Alex, who immediately closed her eyes because of the bright light.

 

“Why do you hate me?” Alex grumbled, slapping her hands over her eyes. “Turn down the brightness.” Alex was not having a good time. Not at all. She had an early start tomorrow and she could _not_ afford to lose this much sleep.

 

Not with a day full of meetings.

 

“Sorry,” Kara said, doing as she was told before handing the phone over to Alex.

 

Sighing, Alex read the headline.

 

_Supergirl: Fastest Sex With the Fastest Man Alive?_

 

Alex handed the phone back over.

 

“I really don’t want to be you,” she mumbled, turning away from Kara and pushing her cushion back under her head. “With all the hot sex you’re having, I don’t know how I would ever keep up if I were you.”

 

Kara poked her in the side for that, which Alex ignored.

 

“You’re supposed to be offended on my behalf,” she whined, curling up against Alex’s back.

 

“I am,” Alex said, taking Kara’s hand and wrapping it around her waist. “But it’s three goddamn AM, Kara, and I have a shitty meeting in the morning. We can talk about how terrible the media is at another time, alright?”

 

“Okay…” Kara whispered, pressing her nose against the back of Alex’s neck. “I promise I’ll bring you your favorite food during lunch.” She placed a gentle kiss against Alex’s shoulder blade, which Alex also ignored.

 

“Thanks.” Squeezing Kara’s hand, Alex let out a slow breath. “I love you.”

 

“Love you, too,” Kara murmured, holding Alex close.

 

-

 

When Alex walked into Kara’s apartment, she spotted the newspaper on the dinner table first.

 

Shrugging off her jacket, she slowly walked over to it and looked down.

 

_Supergirl: Secretly Dating a Handsome Government Agent?_

 

The picture underneath showed Kara laying in a crater after her red kryptonite episode with Alex crouched by her side, reverently touching her face. The article talked about conflicts of interest and all sorts of other crap that Alex wasn’t really all that interested in.

 

These things were all drivel anyway.

 

“Kara?” Alex called out, wondering where her sister had run off to.

 

They were supposed to be having a movie night.

 

“I’m in here,” Kara replied, her voice coming from her bedroom. When Alex walked inside, she saw Kara sitting on her bed. There was a picture frame clutched in her hands, and Alex could see that she was shaking a little.

 

“Are you okay?” Alex asked immediately, swiftly moving to Kara’s side and sitting down next to her. “Did you anything happen?” Looking down, she saw that the picture frame showed both Alex and Kara on their trip to Paris after Kara had finished college. Their faces were pressed against one another and Kara’s smile was almost wider than her face.

 

“The newspaper,” Kara said, shrugging with one of her shoulders.

 

“Don’t let it bother you,” Alex said flippantly, wrapping her arm around Kara’s shoulders. “They don’t even know who I am. If J’onn had gotten to you first, they probably would have paired you up with him.”

 

Clearly struggling, Kara pulled her phone from her pocket and gave it to Alex.

 

“There were more pictures online,” Kara whispered, waiting for Alex to unlock her phone. “You never told me that you carried me to the DEO ambulance all by yourself.” As Alex skimmed through the pictures, Kara caressed the edges of the photograph. “With your broken arm.”

 

Feeling just a bit self-conscious, Alex scratched the side of her face.

 

The pictures showed Alex giving Kara a kiss on the cheek before two other DEO agents hefted Kara inside the ambulance. A couple more showed Alex getting into the vehicle and taking Kara’s hand.

 

“You needed me,” Alex explained, wondering what had Kara so rattled.

 

“When I was… different…” Kara started, putting down the picture frame and sitting on her hands. “I didn’t tell you everything.” She tapped her feet on the floor. “I wasn’t just angry with you, I was…”

 

Alex squeezed her shoulder, trying to encourage her sister.

 

“There were things that I wanted, that…” Kara looked away and closed her eyes.

 

“It’s okay,” Alex soothed her, wrapping her other arm around her as well.

 

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, but that stupid article and those stupid pictures…” Kara’s hands curled into fists and she shook softly in Alex’s grip. She seemed mostly angry with herself. “I’ve never wanted any of those articles to be real before.”

 

Letting out a slow sigh, Alex rubbed Kara’s back.

 

“I can’t believe one of those stupid newspaper headlines is going to be the reason that we get together. I do _not_ accept that,” Alex complained, rolling her eyes at them both. They couldn’t have talked about this just a bit sooner? “Now I’m probably going to have to send them a damn fruit basket.”

 

Kara’s body went very still.

 

“You--” she pulled away from Alex.

 

“Yes,” Alex said clearly, cupping Kara’s cheek.

 

“I’m not sure a fruit basket is going to be enough,” Kara husked, crashing into Alex’s arms once more and giving her a tight hug. Alex wheezed, but she didn’t try to break free. This was good. This was progress.

 

“We still need to talk about some stuff,” Alex said quietly, wishing things could ever just be easy.

 

“I know.” Kara drew her nails along the back of Alex’s neck. “I just want to be happy for a second and not worry about what this will mean for us and our relationship. Or about what everybody else is going to say.”

  
Alex thought that request was pretty fair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they will have so much to discuss. so many issues. but for right now: HUGS
> 
> all mistakes are mine
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	23. the sister curse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Impetuous" [Alex x Kara; Mild Angst]
> 
> Summary: "Alex is pissed, because Kara went on a mission without her."

“What were you thinking?!” Alex yelled, slamming Kara’s front door behind herself.

 

A look of annoyance crossed Kara’s face.

 

“I did what I was supposed to,” she retorted, crossing her arms over her chest. She was sitting on the couch with the television blaring something unimportant in the background. Alex could tell that she was trying to look relaxed.

 

“When you get a lead on some new Cadmus project, you _call_ me! You don’t go out there all by yourself!” Alex was fuming by this point, and she shrugged off her leather jacket before she could start sweating too much. Arguing always fired her up. “They have kryptonite weapons, Kara!”

 

Still looking defiant, Kara scowled.

 

“You were busy,” she defended herself.

 

“A stupid blind date doesn’t qualify as _busy_ , Kara Zor-El!” Alex’s entire body was shaking. Not only had Kara gone out there by herself, she’d also come back with quite a few bruises and scrapes. And the fact that they’d healed by now did not make this situation any better.

 

“Don’t Kara Zor-El me,” Kara grumbled, getting to her feet and walking over to her refrigerator. “You’ve gone on missions without me before.” She pulled out a bottle of juice. “And I think you’re starting to sound just a bit hypocritical.”

 

Tapping her foot on the floor, Alex tried to come up with a comeback.

 

“You could have been killed.” The thought alone sent a shiver of fear down her spine. What if Kara _had_ been killed? What would Alex do then? “I’m not going to lose you to a bunch of bigoted imbeciles. The next time you go out on a mission, you _call me_ . No matter what I’m doing.”   


“I don’t need you to hold my hand.” Kara almost broke the glass she’d just plucked out of her kitchen cabinet. “I can handle this superhero thing all by myself, Alex. I’m a big girl now.” She poured herself a glass of juice. “I’m glad that you want to help me, but I can fix things by myself on occasion.”

 

“What has gotten into you lately?” Alex asked, feeling like Kara had just slapped her in the face. “Remember a few weeks ago? When you reprimanded me for going off on my own?” She shook her head. “That’s _exactly_ what you’re doing now.”

 

Looking away, Kara picked up her juice and took a sip.

 

“I’m fine,” she lied, only making Alex more angry.

 

“You’re not fine.” Alex placed her hands on the kitchen island and stared Kara down. “You’ve always been impetuous, Kara, but this is going too far.” She leaned in closer. “You need to tell me what’s going on with you.”

 

“Nothing!” Kara’s protest was too vehement, which only worried Alex further.

 

“Are you angry with me? Did I do something?” A vein throbbed at Alex’s temple. “If I did anything, then you need to tell me and we need to have a conversation about it.” Alex waved a hand back and forth in between them. “You remember what that’s like, right?”

 

Huffing angrily, Kara finished her glass of juice.

 

“I don’t need to have a _conversation_ , Alex, you’re the one who’s blowing this all way out of proportion.” She poured more juice into her glass. “I stopped Cadmus from destroying all alien life on Earth. I feel like you should be _proud_ of me. No one ever asks _Clark_ why he didn’t bring back-up.”

 

Alex furrowed her brows.

 

“So this is about Clark?” she asked, her voice suddenly much softer and kinder. If Kara was feeling upset about her cousin again, this could end in tears, and Alex didn’t want to be the one to cause them.

 

“No, it’s not about Clark!” Kara protested, stuffing a cookie into her mouth. “I’m just trying to make a point.”

 

Rubbing her temples, Alex got herself a beer from the fridge.

 

“Just talk to me. Please - this isn’t like you,” Alex said, feeling much calmer now that she had a beer in her hand. At some point, she should probably start to worry about that feeling. But now wasn’t the time. “I just want to help.”

 

Clearly feeling guilty now, Kara bit her bottom lip, still refusing to look at Alex.

 

“Really, Alex, it’s-- it’s nothing,” Kara whispered, doing a terrible job at keeping her feelings to herself. She’d always been that way, even when they were teenagers. “You don’t have to worry about me. I promise.”

 

That only made Alex worry _more_.

 

“Kara…” she said reassuringly, crossing to Kara’s side of the island, putting down her beer and rubbing her arm. “You know you can tell me anything. “I thought we established that when I came out to you.” They didn’t have to hold anything back from one another - not now that Alex had humiliated herself so thoroughly with the whole Maggie debacle. “You can trust me. I’ll always be here for you.”

 

That didn’t help, either.

 

Kara seemed to almost curl in on herself.

 

“I’m not angry with you,” Kara murmured, fiddling with her glass. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m just being a jerk.” Sighing, she rubbed her face, before placing her head down on the island and groaning. “I’m sorry.”

 

Gently scratching Kara’s back, Alex furrowed her brows.

 

“Come on, Kara, _talk to me_ ,” she said, softly stroking Kara’s hair. “Tell me what’s bothering you.” Usually, Alex wouldn’t have pressured Kara like this, but if it made her fly into dangerous enemy territory all by herself… Alex simply wouldn’t stand for that.

 

 _Stronger together_ , she reminded herself.

 

Straightening up once more, Kara chanced a glance at Alex’s face.

 

“Did you…” she started, bringing her hands back in front of her body and fiddling with her nails. “You said that… you’ve been remembering stuff about your childhood. Gay stuff.” She looked away again and Alex nodded slowly.

 

“I have,” she confirmed, stroking her thumb along Kara’s shoulder blade.

 

“Did you…” Kara chanced another glance back. She looked so vulnerable that Alex wanted to reach out and take her sister into her arms. “I’m just wondering…” This was clearly difficult for her and Alex could almost feel her agony within her own bones. “Did you ever… have those feelings… about me?”

 

Whatever Alex had been expecting, it wasn’t _that_.

 

Her surprise must have shown on her face, because Kara blushed to the roots of her hair and looked away. “Sorry, forget I said anything,” she forced out quickly, before getting to her feet and striding back over to the couch. “Maybe you should go. I’m tired.”

 

Standing frozen in the kitchen, Alex swallowed. Hard.

 

“Is that why you don’t want to spend any time with me?” she asked quietly, not quite managing to keep the note of pain out of her voice. “Because you think I wanted more from you when we were teenagers?” The thought made her physically ache inside.

 

“No!” Kara said quickly, getting to her feet and walking back over. An endless back and forth. “No, of course not.” She fiddled with her fingers in front of her torso and grimaced. “I was just, you know, wondering.”

 

“And clearly getting freaked out by the idea,” Alex observed, crossing her arms over her chest once more. “I wasn’t perving on you when we were teens. You don’t have to worry about that. I wasn’t lusting after you every time you took off your shirt in front of me.”

 

Kara’s face paled.

 

“Alex, no!” She grabbed Alex’s shoulders. “That’s not what I’m thinking at all.”

 

She looked so helpless that Alex almost felt bad for making those insinuations. But then again, how else was she supposed to read this situation? This moment was like her worst nightmare come to life.

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara whispered.

 

“It’s fine.” Alex could tell that her voice was frosty, but she couldn’t help herself.

 

Looking stricken, Kara shook her head.

 

Then, she leaned forward, but before her lips could touch Alex’s, Alex pulled away.

 

“What are you doing?” she asked, feeling suddenly breathless. Had Kara just tried to kiss her? Had her _sister_ just _tried to kiss her_? That idea was more than Alex’s brain could handle. And why was she suddenly imagining how soft Kara’s lips would be?

 

Now, Kara looked even sadder.

 

“I thought, maybe…” Kara said, looking nothing like the powerful hero she really was. “Maybe now that you know you’re a lesbian, you could…” She sniffled. “I’m sorry, Alex.” There were tears in her eyes, and Alex bit back a sigh.

 

A moment later, Kara was in her arms.

 

“Shh, it’s alright,” Alex soothed her, gently rubbing Kara’s back. “It’s all good. You did nothing wrong.” Even though Alex had no idea if that was even true, she couldn’t very well tell her sister anything else at this moment. “I’m sorry I didn’t see it.”

 

This was certainly unexpected.

 

But maybe it shouldn’t have been.

 

Memories flashed before Alex’s eyes. Of Kara making eyes at her. Kara laughing at all of her bad jokes. Kara cuddling up to her on the couch and in bed. Kara holding her hand whenever possible. Kara kissing her cheek. Kara rubbing her back. Kara, Kara, Kara.

 

Maybe she’d been blind, or maybe she’d missed the signs on purpose.

 

“No, I’m sorry,” Kara said again, holding on tightly to Alex’s back. “I should have told you years ago. Then maybe I could have…” She sniffled again, and Alex felt Kara’s tears soak through her sweater. “Maybe I could have moved on.”

 

The thought made Alex feel weirdly tight inside.

 

She didn’t say anything.

 

“This doesn’t change anything,” Alex lied, pulling back from Kara and wiping her tears away. “But you need to let me in, Kara. You need to let me help with the bad guys.” Talking about work was easier. Talking about work involved less feelings. Less confusion on Alex’s part. Less thinking about how touching Kara had always come with an excited little tingle in her stomach.

 

Nodding, Kara took hold of Alex’s wrist and stroked her thumb along it.

 

The gesture made Alex’s heart speed up.

 

Misinterpreting her accelerated heartbeat, Kara pulled away.

 

“Sorry,” she mumbled, taking a step back from Alex. “I guess things are going to be weird for a while. I promise I was never perving on you, either!” She suddenly looked alarmed and pleading.

 

“I know, Kara,” Alex said, shaking her head. “I’m not worried about that.”

 

She wasn’t, actually. The thought of Kara seeing her naked wasn’t even a blip on Alex’s radar anymore. Not when she had so much more difficult things to worry about - like the fact that Kara had gone out on a mission by herself when Alex could have been with her.

 

“If you say so…” Kara whispered, grabbing the hem of her pajama top.

 

“I’m serious,” Alex reassured her, grabbing both of Kara’s hands. “I still love you. You’re not going to get rid of me that easily.” She gave Kara one of her signature smiles, even though she didn’t feel it.

 

Why did holding hands with Kara suddenly feel so different?

 

Nodding, Kara let out a breath of relief. “It feels good to finally say it.” She closed her eyes and smiled. “I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you for years.” Actually hearing the words made Alex’s heart pound even faster. _I’m in love with you_. “And I get that you don’t feel the same. I really do.”

 

Alex swallowed down her reaction.

 

“Yeah,” she croaked, clearing her throat. “Right.”

 

“It’s like I can finally breathe,” Kara continued, while Alex’s lungs felt as though they were slowly but surely closing in on themselves. This wasn’t a dream or a joke. Kara was really in love with her.

 

Kara.

 

The personification of sunshine, rainbows and kittens.

 

In love with Alex.

 

It was almost unthinkable.

 

Alex would have to think about that. And she would have to take her own damn advice.

 

 _Converse, damn it_ , she thought. _Use your words_.

 

“Can we shelf this conversation for a while?” she asked Kara, squeezing her sister’s hands. “I need some time to think about how _I_ feel.” She saw a sudden glimmer of hope in Kara’s eyes, before her sister apparently squashed it. Alex knew _that_ feeling all too well. If you didn’t hope for anything, you’d never feel disappointed. “I’m not saying we can’t see each other, I just… I’m confused.”

 

Letting out a low sigh, Kara gave her a sympathetic look.

 

“I know how you’re feeling,” she murmured, letting go of one of Alex’s hands and placing it on Alex’s cheek. “I tried to make myself stop feeling this way for a long time. Pretty much from the moment I realized that I was in love with you.”

 

Alex clenched her jaw.

 

“Can you stop saying that, please?” she asked softly, desperately trying to cling onto her sanity.

 

“Sure,” Kara said kindly, gently stroking Alex’s skin. “It took me a long time to be sort of okay with it.” She scuffed her socked feet on the ground. “I know it’s not easy. Eliza really wanted us to be sisters.”

 

 _Sisters_.

 

Right.

 

Running her hand through her hair, Alex nodded.

 

“Yeah…” She looked at Kara. “No more solo missions.”

 

Kara smiled sadly.

 

“No more solo missions,” she promised, going in for another hug, which Alex appreciated immensely. Kara gave the best hugs and Alex needed it more than Kara probably knew. Because her whole world might be turned upside down soon, and Alex wasn’t ready for her status quo to change _again_.

 

“Thank you,” Alex breathed, her hands fisted in Kara’s pajama top.

 

It would take time to figure out.

 

But she knew she could do it.

 

With Kara by her side, she could do anything.

  
Either as a sister, or as something different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> these nerds. I love them. be very excited for tomorrow. 
> 
> all mistakes are mine
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo


	24. the way things happen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Word/Prompt: "Fecundity" [Alex x Kara; Mostly fluff, a bit of angst]
> 
> Summary: "Alex doesn't understand how this could have happened to her. She and Kara go to the Fortress to investigate."

“B-But how… how did this happen,” Alex demanded incredulously, staring down at the white stick with the two blue lines. It felt like her stomach was swallowing her up from the inside, and the last two weeks of morning sickness didn’t exactly make her feel  _ better  _ about the situation.

 

“I don’t know,” Kara answered quietly, walking up and down in front of the coffee table with her arms crossed over her chest. She was still wearing her Supergirl outfit, since they’d only just touched down in her apartment before Alex had peed on the goddamn stick. “Have you… I mean… when was the last time you…”

 

It seemed like the thought of Alex having sex with anyone was causing her some sort of physical pain, and Alex knew exactly why she was hesitating. 

 

“I haven’t had sex with anyone since… you know…” she trailed off. 

 

Since she and Kara had gotten drunk together at that alien bar a few weeks before? Since they’d talked about how lonely they both were? Since they’d decided that one night of meaningless passion couldn’t possibly hurt and that no one else would be better suited? Since they’d thought that making each other feel good couldn’t lead to any drama down the line? 

 

Yeah, that.

 

“And… before…?” Kara continued, still not looking at Alex. Her cape was swishing back and forth with the power of her strides and Alex tried not to notice the way her thighs tensed every time she took a step. Despite the alcohol, Alex remembered clearly how Kara’s muscles had flexed and shifted when Alex had been between her legs.

 

“No, not for a couple of months, and not with a penis for a couple of years,” Alex replied, eyes going back to the pregnancy test in between her hands. “Maybe it’s just a false positive. I mean, there’s no way you could have possibly gotten me pregnant, is there?” 

 

They hadn’t really talked about their night of drunken sex after the fact. Alex had wanted to, and she could tell that Kara was bursting at the seams to tell her  _ something _ about it as well, but then Alex’s mother had called and had thrown a big icy bucket of water all over that idea. 

 

Because the sex had been  _ good _ , and maybe, if reality hadn’t come crashing down, Alex could have pretended for a second longer that she and Kara could talk about that unspoken heap of emotions that had been between them ever since Kara had saved her from that airplane crash. 

 

Maybe.

 

“I honestly have no idea,” Kara said quietly, absentmindedly running a hand through her hair. “I’ve never really… had sex with a person with a vagina before, so… I don’t know if it’s possible.” She shook her head and closed her eyes. “But this makes no sense. People don’t get pregnant when I  _ touch  _ them.”

 

Alex didn’t bother to remind Kara that they did a lot more than simply touch that night.

 

“I don’t know how this is possible either,” she said, getting up from the couch and walking over to the kitchen to dispose of the test. “I’m going to run out and buy a second test. Because those things do give out false positives and maybe this really is just an annoying stomach bug.”

 

She couldn’t believe this could be anything else.

 

-

 

“Again?” Kara asked, standing behind the couch and looking down at the white stick with the two blue lines. “Maybe it’s not us, maybe you touched an alien that impregnates you without your consent or something.”

 

“Yeah, I touched  _ you _ …” Alex whispered, getting up and walking back into the kitchen to throw away the second pregnancy test. How likely was it that two of those damn things malfunctioned? 

 

She knew her words were too harsh the second she saw Kara’s hurt facial expression.

 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.” She joined Kara back by the couch and tentatively reached out to take her sister’s hand. They’d been just a bit distant over the last few weeks and more reserved with their touches. “I’m just freaking out. I wasn’t really planning on having kids in general.”

 

Kara sighed.

 

“And now you’re having one with  _ me _ , maybe…” she whispered, looking down at Alex’s flat stomach and furrowing her brows. “Unless you don’t want to, or… I guess if I don’t want to. If we rather didn’t do this, I’m sure Clark’s Fortress could help us end the pregnancy.”

 

“If I’m really pregnant,” Alex mumbled, still holding out hope that this was all some sort of cosmic joke and that she really had picked up two faulty pregnancy tests in a row. It could happen, right? Maybe? 

 

So many maybes, so few answers.

 

“We should go to the Fortress anyway, to confirm what’s going on,” Kara said, looking like she was on the verge of giving Alex a crushing hug. When she didn’t move, Alex made the decision for her, wrapping both arms securely around Kara’s neck and holding on tightly.

 

Kara’s hug was just as reassuring.

 

-

 

“The Fortress can scan you and tell us exactly what’s happening,” Kara said, adjusting Alex’s woolen hat before picking up the big key that Superman kept lying around the Fortress. Alex usually enjoyed making fun of it, but today her heart wasn’t in it.

 

Once they were inside, Kara pulled her up to the big center console and twisted one of the crystals to make Jor-El’s voice sound through the Fortress.

 

“Kara Zor-El, Alexandra Danvers, how may I be of assistance?” he asked, his words echoing around the huge chamber. 

 

Alex wanted to reach out and take Kara’s hand, but she also felt like there would be bile rising up her esophagus any second now. Instead of forging a connection, she crossed her arms over her chest and buried her nose in the thick scarf Kara had wrapped around her. 

 

It smelled like Kara. 

 

Like home.

 

“We think Alex might be pregnant, um, with my baby,” Kara said, gripping her cape and fiddling with it in front of her body. “I was hoping you could scan her and see if we’re correct with our assumption.”

 

Without a word, a beam of blinding light surrounded Alex, Kryptonian symbols spinning all around her. She could still see Kara through the beam of light, and she could have sworn that Kara’s eyes were watching her sadly.

 

In a few seconds, the beam of light disappeared.

 

“You are indeed correct, Kara Zor-El,” Jor-El’s voice spoke again, his deep and rich voice cutting through every last thread of hope Alex had been clinging on to. “The embryo is healthy and strong.”

 

Feeling her legs give out, Alex was almost on her knees by the time Kara was by her side. Pulling her back to her feet, Kara kept her arms around Alex’s waist, keeping her steady and upright. 

 

“How the hell did this happen?” Alex asked, voice raspy with some unidentifiable emotion. She wasn’t sure if she was happy, devastated, or simply confused. “Kara doesn’t have any sperm cells, Jor-El. How the  _ fuck  _ did this happen?”

 

“The fecundity of Kryptonian bodies under Earth’s yellow sun surpass the laws of human biology,” Jor-El responded, obviously unperturbed by Alex’s emotional state or her swearing. “There are ways to bypass it in the future, if you do not wish to have another child.”

 

“Godfucking damn it, this is just fucking  _ perfect _ , isn’t it,” Alex growled, finally finding the strength to stand on her own two feet again. “We have sex  _ once  _ and of course the world shits on me immediately.”

 

Pulling out of Kara’s embrace, Alex stomped in the direction of the entrance, Kara following after her a few seconds later.

 

“We can figure this out together,” Kara called after her, her boots making crunching noises on the ice and snow of the Fortress floor. “We always do! Maybe this isn’t such a bad thing. You and I would make great moms, right? Who says we can’t be great moms together?”

 

Feeling like her head was about to explode, Alex turned on her heels and pushed her finger into Kara’s chest.

 

“That’s easy for you to say! You’re not the one who’s going to blow up like a balloon if we keep this kid! You’re not the one who’s going to have to stop doing her job, and you’re not the one who’s going to get yelled at by Eliza Danvers for fucking your  _ sister _ ,” she raged, fists shaking at her sides. She wanted to cry, she wanted to scream, she wanted to throw things.

 

This wasn’t how things had been supposed to go.

 

When Kara didn’t say anything - either too stunned or too hurt to speak - Alex sighed and wiped her face with her gloved hands. 

 

“Just take me home,” she said, defeat clearly lacing her words. 

 

Beyond everything else, she was  _ tired _ .

 

-

 

The next morning, Alex woke up to the feeling of her bed dipping under the weight of somebody else sitting down next to her legs. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara said quietly, immediately soothing Alex’s temporary anxiety about no longer being alone. Kara wouldn’t hurt her. “I know if we do this, it’s going to be harder on you than it is on me. And I know we need to make a list of what we want, and I know you haven’t even entertained the idea of having kids…”

 

She’d clearly come prepared with a speech, and Alex kept her eyes closed as she spoke.

 

“And we aren’t a couple, and we’re foster sisters, and basically everything says we shouldn’t be having a baby together…” She trailed off, and Alex lifted one eyelid to watch Kara biting her bottom lip and fiddle with her cape again. “But it happened, and I want us to talk about it before we make any decisions.”

 

Sighing, she looked over to Alex, who finally opened both eyes.

 

“I love you, and if I had to pick anyone to raise a child with, I would pick you in a heartbeat,” Kara finished, twisting her cape around her hand so tightly Alex was afraid she’d end up ripping it to shreds.

 

“Okay,” Alex agreed, pushing herself into a sitting position. 

 

“Okay?” Kara asked, the cape looking ominously like it was about to be destroyed.

 

Reaching out with her hands, Alex untangled the red material from Kara’s nervous fingers.

 

“Yeah, let’s make a list. Let’s talk it out. Let’s decide if we’re going to keep the kid or not,” she said, swallowing hard. Even if she wanted to, she had no idea if she could go through with terminating Kara’s child. 

 

Kara’s child would no doubt be wonderful. It was Alex’s half of the equation that was giving her the bigger headache.

 

Before she could say another word, Kara was in her arms, hugging her tightly.

 

-

 

“Alright, so,  _ positive _ ,” Kara started, staring down at the piece of paper in front of her and tapping her lips with the pen in her hand. They were sitting on Alex’s couch. After Kara had changed into some of Alex’s sweats, the two of them had gotten themselves some cereal before plopping down in front of the TV to talk things out. “We would have a cute, chubby baby around.”

 

“Negative,” Alex said, grabbing a pillow and hugging it close, “we would have a loud, messy baby around.”

 

Kara gave her a  _ look _ .

 

“What? It’s true! We’d be cleaning up after the spawn every day for  _ years _ . That’s a valid negative!” Alex tried to defend her position, taking a sip from the chocolate milk she’d put on the coffee table. 

 

“Don’t call our baby ‘spawn’, Alex,” Kara reprimanded her, right before she jotted down ‘messy’ and ‘loud’ onto the negative side. “Positive: We could impart our knowledge and heritage on our child and raise a wonderful person who will make the world a better place.”

 

“Negative: We could project all of our failings onto our kid and expect too much of them and end up messing them up for life,” Alex said, only half kidding. She had plenty of issues, and the thought of making her child suffer under any of them was terrifying. 

 

Putting down the pen, Kara turned towards Alex and gave her a knowing look.

 

“What?” Alex repeated, picking up the pen and writing down what she’d just said.

 

“You’re not your mother, Alex,” Kara whispered, reaching out and taking Alex’s hand. 

 

“I know that,” Alex replied, looking down at the pillow on her lap. “But what if I do or say something that messes them up? What if I do something wrong?” She could already see herself putting work ahead of the kid, and that’s not what she wanted to do to someone. She knew first-hand how difficult it was to be the child of parents with a higher calling.

 

“Every parent messes up,” Kara tried to soothe her. “Who knows, I could be a terrible mom.”

 

“You could never be a terrible mom,” Alex mumbled, taking in Kara’s sloppy casual handwriting. “You’re going to be the best mom ever.”

 

Scooting over on the couch, Kara wrapped both arms around Alex’s body and pressed her face against Alex’s neck. 

 

“That’s what I think about you,” she said, making Alex feel warm and gooey inside. 

 

-

 

In the end, the list spanned multiple pages, and Alex was pretty sure the bad seriously outweighed the good.

 

And yet, when she considered terminating the pregnancy, the thought of actually going through with it made her feel sick inside. She knew she didn’t have to make a decision right away, and that Kara would support her decision no matter what, but the knowledge that there was a child growing inside of her was like a ticking time bomb.

 

The longer she waited, the more she imagined what their child would look like. 

 

Would they have blond hair like Kara? Would they have Kara’s beautiful blue eyes? 

 

Would they be stubborn like Alex, or kind like Kara? Would they want to help people, and go out of their way to make sure the world was safe? Would they snuggle up between Alex and Kara during movie night and complain about Kara’s choice in romantic comedies? 

 

Alex had no idea what to do.

 

-

 

Two weeks after they’d found out for sure, Alex was awake late at night while Kara slumbered peacefully next to her. 

 

Alex’s hands were folded over her stomach, and she drummed her fingers to the rhythm of Lois’s favorite Whitesnake song. Since Lois was currently the only one with a half-human, half-Kryptonian baby around (as far as Alex was aware), Alex had called her to talk about a few things. 

 

And Lois was discreet when she needed to be.

 

The conversation hadn’t exactly been the reason for her decision, but it had certainly helped her a great deal, and Alex had been wondering about how to tell Kara all evening. Finally, she’d chickened out and the two of them had gone to sleep in Kara’s bed. 

 

It was the first time they’d slept in the same bed since… well… since they  _ hadn’t  _ slept in Kara’s bed during that night of passionate lovemaking. 

 

And that’s what it had been.

 

Lovemaking.

 

Slipping further down the bed, she turned her head to look at Kara’s sleeping face. 

 

She loved Kara more than she’d ever loved anybody else in her entire life. Maggie had been an important part of her self-discovery and Alex wouldn’t take back what she’d felt for her friend in a million years, but even then… a small part of Alex had  _ known _ that she loved Kara. 

 

Turning onto her side, Alex lifted her hand and shook Kara’s shoulder, knowing that if she didn’t tell her now, she’d lose her nerve.

 

When Kara woke, she made a small gurgling sound, and her head lifted tiredly off the pillow.

 

“Alex?” she asked quietly, rubbing her eyes and brushing some hair out of her face. “What’s going on?”

 

_ Now or never _ , Alex thought to herself.

 

“I want to keep the baby,” she said quickly, as though the words would become untrue if she didn’t say them out loud. “I thought about why I want to keep it, and it’s not because it’s half yours, even though I love that it’s half yours. It’s because I want to keep it. I want this baby.”

 

Blinking sleepily, Kara’s brain took a few seconds to process her words, which made Alex more than a little anxious. After all, what if Kara had changed her mind?

 

Then, a nanosecond later, Kara was on top of her, hugging her tightly and winding her arms around Alex’s body. With Kara’s head tucked under Alex’s chin, Alex could only guess that there were tears running down her sister’s cheeks.

 

“I’m so happy,” Kara cried, careful not to put any pressure on Alex’s belly as she covered every other inch of Alex’s body. 

 

Smiling weakly, Alex wrapped her own arms around her sister and held on gently as she wept.

 

“But you’re the one who’s getting up every night to rock the little devil back to sleep, because you’re the Kryptonian in the family and you need less sleep than I do,” Alex was quick to add, already wondering how their living arrangements would end up working out. “And we’re going to share the chores. I’m not going to be the only one changing diapers around here.”

 

Sniffling, Kara lifted her head and pressed her lips against Alex’s cheek.

 

“I promise,” she whispered, eyes closed as she rubbed their cheeks together a few times. “We’re going to be the best co-parents ever.” She squealed, her weight pressing Alex into the mattress, reminding Alex uncomfortably of the night they’d made love. And how Kara had pressed her into the mattress then as she slid in and out of Alex over and over again. “I can’t wait to buy a crib.”

 

Humming in agreement, Alex closed her eyes and thought about all the things they’d need to buy. Starting with one or a dozen of those  _ What to Expect When You’re Expecting _ books. Alex would take all the help she could get.

 

And then there was her mom to consider.

 

Eliza would flip her shit once she realized what Alex had done. She might have some stern looks for Kara, but she’d crucify Alex for letting Kara into her bed in the first place. 

 

Before her mind could further drift into the future, Kara sighed happily.

 

“Guess that means you’re moving in…” she whispered, obviously content to stay right where she was. 

 

At her words, Alex’s eyelids flipped back open.

 

“Why am I moving in with you? Why can’t you move in with me?” she demanded, turning her head to the side and trying to move Kara off of her. When her sister didn’t budge Alex was more than a little salty that she hadn’t been born with super strength.

 

Instead, Kara lifted her head and raised a skeptical eyebrow.

 

“Your apartment is furnished like a bachelor pad,” she said with a slightly unimpressed undertone. “We’re not moving our baby into a bachelor pad.” She poked Alex’s ribs, making her squirm. “And you spend more time here anyway.”

 

Grumbling, Alex closed her eyes.

 

“It’s not a bachelor pad, it’s a minimalist design,” she complained, having had this discussion with Kara more than a few times before. 

 

“You barely have any furniture,” Kara pointed out, just as she moved both arms and placed them next to Alex’s head, one on each side. Now Alex was well and truly caged. “Our baby is going to need furniture. And space to crawl and maybe even fly around in. It just makes sense for us to move in here temporarily, before we go and look for a new place.”

 

Feeling just a bit petulant, Alex scowled and looked to the side.

 

“Oh, don’t you make that face at me, Alexandra,” Kara teased, leaning down and blowing a raspberry against Alex’s cheek, making Alex squirm even more. 

 

“Kara! Gross!” 

 

All she got was a laugh.

 

-

 

This was beyond awkward and uncomfortable.

 

This was torture.

 

This was pain.

 

Alex was sitting in a conference room at DEO headquarters with both J’onn and Lucy, waiting for Kara to return from her latest mission. They’d requested an official sit down with both of their bosses, which was why Lucy had left the bunker facility outside of the city to come up to the DEO tower.

 

Kara somewhat had to force Alex to agree, but Alex didn’t see why they couldn’t just keep the whole thing under wraps for just a bit longer. Alex could be careful out in the field… Yeah, even she didn’t fully believe that.

 

With a sigh, Lucy looked down at her watch.

 

“Not that I don’t appreciate the free time, Alex, but Vasquez and I have a lunch meeting in an hour,” she said, leaning back in her chair. “Do you know if Supergirl is going to be here anytime soon or can you just tell us what’s going on with the two of you?”

 

J’onn stayed silent next to her, and Alex hoped he would respect her privacy and stay out of her thoughts, because the thought of telling the two of them without Kara next to her was absolutely terrifying. She was a kickass agent, she was a doctor, she had fought and defeated multiple high-level threats… and she was a bit of a scaredy cat when it came to personal affairs.

 

Just as Lucy opened her mouth a second time, Kara finally stumbled in. 

 

She was covered in soot and scratch marks, but otherwise she looked fine. Still, before either J’onn or Lucy could say a word, Alex was on her feet and by her side, arms wrapped around her sister’s waist.

 

“I’m sorry I’m so late,” Kara said, closing the glass down behind her and leaning into Alex’s steadying embrace. “I almost had it under control when the Glazzonio freaked out because some guy with a gun shot at him.” 

 

Alex helped her over into one of the seats, even though she was pretty sure Kara could walk on her own. The scratch marks looked superficial and would likely heal in no time at all.

 

“Are you both okay?” Before Alex sat down, she reopened the door and called over to Winn to bring in the special Supergirl first aid kit. 

 

“Yeah,” Kara said, sounding tired as she leaned back in the soft leather chair. “I managed to calm the Glazzonio back down before he could burn down the entire block.” Alex snatched the first aid kit out of Winn’s fingers, nodded at him and closed the door. “He’s down in holding, but I don’t think he’s a threat. He said he just got to Earth. I don’t think he means any harm.”

 

Nodding, Lucy leaned forward just as Alex pulled out the special antiseptic she’d designed to clean out any alien residue from Kara’s wounds. 

 

“Alright, so the threat has been dealt with,” Lucy said approvingly, watching as Alex set up the portable sunlight lamps in front of Kara and turned them on. “ _ Now _ can you tell us why we’re here? There hasn’t been another Kryptonian spaceship, right?”

 

Alex’s hand froze, poised over one of the rapidly closing wounds.

 

When she didn’t volunteer any information, Kara looked in between the three of them and sighed. And yeah, fine, maybe making her sister do the talking was totally a cowardly move, but Alex had absolutely no idea how to tell her two bosses - both of whom were her friends - that Kara and her had made a baby by accident.

 

“Come sit down,” Kara said to her, patting Alex’s hand and motioning to the seat next to her. With a glance at J’onn and Lucy, Alex nodded and slipped into the leather chair, trying to affect a strong and self-assured posture.

 

“No Kryptonian spaceships,” Alex confirmed, crossing her arms over her chest.

 

“It’s actually about a personal matter,” Kara continued, sliding her hand onto Alex’s knee and holding on tightly while Alex tried not to let her nerves get the better of her. What if J’onn and Lucy shunned them for what they’d done? 

 

Taking a deep breath, Kara straightened up in her chair, perfectly embodying her Supergirl persona and drawing on her Kryptonian strength. 

 

“Alex is pregnant,” she said, clearly enunciating each word.

 

Immediately, J’onn stiffened and Lucy’s jaw went slack. 

 

“What?” Lucy called out first, eyes glued to Alex, who tried not to make eye contact and slid down in her chair a little. “I didn’t even know you were dating anyone! Who got you pregnant?” Suddenly, the boredom in the room had all but vanished.

 

“How long have you known about this?” J’onn asked quietly, his voice holding a somewhat hostile undertone. “How long have you been putting yourself and this baby at risk without letting me or anyone else on the team know?”

 

“I’ve been careful,” Alex mumbled, just as Kara said “It’s only been a couple of weeks.”

 

J’onn’s ears seemed to be seconds away from puffing out hot, angry steam.

 

“Light duty, effective immediately,” he ground out, his broad arms crossed over his chest, mirroring Alex’s posture. 

 

Alex was back upright in seconds.

 

“That’s not fair! You can’t just pull me off the streets,” she defended herself, ignoring the disgruntled expression on Kara’s face. She knew very well that Kara wanted her to stay out of active duty as well, but there was a small part of her that desperately wanted to be stubborn. She just wanted things to feel normal for a few more weeks.

 

“Alex, you’re not stupid,” Lucy interjected, just as Alex was about to open her mouth yet again. “You get hit with laser beams and ray guns almost every day. And while it’s questionable whether or not that’s good for  _ you _ , it definitely wouldn’t be good for a baby.”

 

Grinding her teeth, Alex relaxed only when Kara squeezed her knee in encouragement.

 

“Fine,” Alex finally gave in, making Lucy and J’onn nod in obvious relief. While they likely would have tried to keep Alex out of harm's way, it was a lot easier if Alex didn’t get sent into danger at all and stayed at headquarters instead.

 

For a few seconds nobody spoke, then Kara crossed her legs and seemingly started to vibrate in her seat. Of course, she wanted to share her excitement with J’onn and Lucy, two of the people who were closest to her.

 

Meanwhile, Alex wished they could have just kept it all to themselves.

 

“Guys, there’s something else you need to know,” Kara announced excitedly, clearly much less worried that J’onn and Lucy would question their moral compass for sleeping together. Sometimes Alex wished she had her sister’s optimism. “I know this might sound weird, but we went to the Fortress to confirm it and everything.”

 

She reached out with her hands, almost pushing over the portable sunlight lamps.

 

“I’m Alex’s baby mama,” she finished, her smile almost bigger than her face.

 

It took a moment for the information to sink in. When it had, Lucy jumped to feet and pointed her finger at them, making Alex flinch. Was this the moment Lucy called them all kinds of names for hooking up?

 

“I knew it!” she bellowed, slapping her hands together and pumping her fist in the air. “I knew the two of you had something going on on the side! Vasquez owes me so much money.” She nudged J’onn’s shoulder, who looked from Alex to Kara and back again. 

 

Alex’s face burned.

 

“Was this planned?” J’onn asked, clearly trying to wrap his head around the whole thing while Lucy pulled out her phone. She would no doubt be texting Vasquez, the traitor. Alex couldn’t believe the two of them had had a bet going on about them.

 

“No,” Alex grumbled, wondering if J’onn was as disappointed as her mother would be. “We don’t know exactly how it happened, but it doesn’t matter anyway, because it’s not going to happen again.”

 

She tried not to notice the sliver of pain that briefly flit over Kara’s face.

 

“Well, however it came about,” J’onn started, getting up from his chair and walking over to them, “I know the two of you are going to be wonderful mothers. And if you ever have any questions or need someone to babysit, you can always ask me.” 

 

His large hand was warm and reassuring on Alex’s shoulder.

 

-

 

Winn was staring at her.

 

“What?” Alex asked him, giving him a glance out of the corner of her eye.

 

“You haven’t been out of the lab in two weeks,” he replied, narrowing his eyes at her. He was holding his tools as he tried to work on the protective shield that would prevent kryptonite from hurting Kara and Superman in the future. “It’s weird.”

 

Looking up from her microscope, Alex gave him a stern glare.

 

“It’s not weird,” she said, before she looked back down again.

 

“I heard some people talking,” he said, putting down the tools and pulling up his goggles. “Some say you’ve done something wrong and J’onn’s put you on ice until you’ve realized what you’ve done.” He walked over to her and leaned against the table. “What’s going on with you?”

 

Sighing, Alex leaned back in her chair and rubbed her eyes. She wished she’d never formed this sort of friendship with Winn. He was way too intuitive when he wanted to be, and even though she knew he wouldn’t judge her, the thought of actually telling anybody else at work was not something Alex felt too keen about.

 

She’d even talked Kara out of telling anybody else until Alex felt ready, and Kara constantly seemed about to burst at the seams. 

 

It wasn’t fair that Alex was making her keep quiet, and that she’d told Kara she wasn’t ready to move in, and all the other things Alex was making more difficult for them. 

 

She just needed time.

 

“You know I won’t tell anyone,” Winn tried again, before he adjusted his cardigan and brushed a bit of lint from his sleeve. “You can totally trust me. Maybe I can even help with whatever’s happening. I’m pretty good at stuff.”

 

Grumbling, Alex looked around them to check if anyone else was around. The last thing she wanted was to become even more of a talking point for her colleagues. The fact that she wasn’t on active duty anymore was cause for enough suspicion right now.

 

Once she was sure they were alone, she got to her feet and leaned against the table as well, gripping the wood under her hands almost tight enough to hurt. 

 

“If I tell you what’s going on, you have to promise me to keep this to yourself,” Alex reinforced his earlier statement, still looking out for anyone who might be wandering into the lab. “If I find out you’ve been blabbing about this to anyone, I’m going to do horrible things to you.”

 

Winn visibly swallowed, then mimicked her position.

 

“I promise, I’m all ears,” he said, swaying closer to her as though to bump her shoulder with his before obviously thinking better of it. He knew she didn’t like to be touched by anyone who wasn’t Kara or J’onn. 

 

Staring down at her boots, she clenched her jaw.

 

“Kara got me pregnant,” she confessed, her voice barely audible above the sounds of the machines around them. “We slept together once and for some reason her Kryptonian egg cells are just a little bit too easily excitable and now she wants me to move in with her and nest and I know I want this baby and I want to raise it with her, but it’s all going so fast.”

 

When she chanced another glance at Winn, she saw that his mouth was hanging open.

 

“Okay, I’ve got to admit, I did not see that coming,” he replied, his eyes flitting down to her flat stomach. She knew she’d have to get used to that, too. People seeing the bump before they saw the person. And she wasn’t even showing yet. “Are you and Kara… together?”

 

Alex’s heart beat faster at the insinuation.

 

They hadn’t talked about  _ that  _ yet, either.

 

“No,” she mumbled, hands still clutching the edge of the table. “It was just a one-time thing, and it backfired spectacularly.” 

 

Humming, he tapped his shoes against the linoleum floor.

 

“Yeah, I really can’t help with that,” he conceded, his voice sounding so apologetic that it made her laugh. “But I can promise to make your super baby a really cool super suit to fly around in. And a couple of really sweet onesies. DEO style.”

 

He held up his hand and she rolled her eyes.

 

“Thanks,” she said, actually feeling a little better now that she’d told someone else.

 

-

 

“Wait, wait, let me get that!” Kara said loudly as Alex got to her knees to pick up a box full of DVDs and books. Slightly annoyed, she stepped away as Kara picked up the box and carried it over to her own bookshelf. 

 

“You’ve barely let me help,” Alex complained, crossing her arms over her chest and looking around the rest of the boxes in Kara’s apartment. There were many that still needed to be put away, and the sight of them made Alex yearn for her old apartment already. “I’m not going to hurt the baby by carrying a box of dishes.”

 

She knew Kara was just trying to help, but her increased attentiveness was slowly driving Alex insane. They would need to have a serious discussion about Kara’s protective streak - and no, Alex did not think it was hypocritical of her to call Kara too protective.

 

“I just want to make sure,” Kara replied, skipping back over to Alex and giving her a brief hug. “Why don’t you put away the books and I carry all the heavy boxes to their appropriate places.” She gave Alex another cuddle, before super speeding around the apartment.

 

By the time Alex had made her way over to the box of books and DVDs, the boxes were all in their appropriate rooms, and just as Alex bent down to pick up the first book, Kara stopped next to her and grinned.

 

“I’ve emptied out all of the other boxes and put all of your stuff next to my stuff, so if you want, I can do this last one and then we can order a pizza or something,” she raved, her cheeks flushed with excitement at having Alex move in.

 

“You’ve emptied out all of the boxes?” Alex asked incredulously, hands growing taught on the book she was holding. “Without asking me where I would like my own things to go?” Her jaw clenched as she pushed the book onto the shelf. 

 

Kara’s excitement melted away in an instant, replaced by worry for Alex’s obvious anger.

 

“I wanted to make this transition easier for you,” she stammered, grabbing the bottom of her blouse and fiddling with it. “I know moving in can be annoying and time-consuming, and that you haven’t been sleeping well… So I thought… I would do it so you could get some rest…”

 

Her sad puppy dog eyes were almost enough to soothe the angry beast in Alex’s chest.

 

“I know you’re trying to take care of me, but it’s like you’re,” Alex’s words cut off as she balled her hands into fists in front of her body in search of the right word, “you’re  _ suffocating _ me. It’s all about the baby. The baby this, the baby that.” 

 

Alex hated herself a little for how hurt Kara looked at her words, but that didn’t mean Alex didn’t need to say it. They couldn’t keep going like this, with Kara acting like Alex would break apart if Kara didn’t do every little thing for her. 

 

“I’m still my own person, Kara, and you need to let me do things by myself,” she continued, running a hand through her hair and trying not to let Kara’s wobbling bottom lip get to her. “I appreciate that you care about me and this baby and that you want it all to go perfectly, but you need to stop hovering.  _ Especially  _ if we’re going to live together.”

 

She breathed in deeply after her speech, before stooping down and picking up the next book.

 

Before she could say anything else, Kara had super sped away again, and after another blink, the boxes were all back in the living room. They were clearly filled to the brim with Alex’s stuff, and she raised one eyebrow when Kara walked back over to her.

 

“I’m sorry,” Kara said, reaching out and taking Alex’s hand. “I’m sorry I made you feel like you were suffocating around me.” She bit her bottom lip, making Alex blush with the memory of how Kara had bitten her bottom lip during orgasm. She really needed to work on stopping those flashbacks. “Maybe we can unpack all of this together? Like proper co-parents.”

 

Smiling slightly, Alex nodded and handed Kara the book she was holding.

 

-

 

“Just breathe,” Kara whispered, squeezing Alex’s hand and bumping their shoulders together. “Eliza knows we’re coming over, and if things go badly, we’re going to go and let her cool off.” 

 

Nodding with determination, Alex tried to make her body move.

 

“Give me a second,” she said, shaking out her shoulders and pressing a hand against her stomach. She’d been doing that more and more recently, even though she still wasn’t showing in any way. “This might be the day that my mother disowns me.”

 

Kara shook her head.

 

“She’s not going to disown you for having a child,” she said, trying to pull Alex closer to the house without using her super strength. Alex didn’t budge an inch.

 

“She might as soon as she realizes that my sister got me pregnant,” Alex grumbled, reaching down and straightening her leather jacket with her free hand. Maybe she should have gone for a less openly homosexual outfit. Her mother didn’t even know she was gay yet.

 

“Foster sister,” Kara corrected her, letting go of Alex’s hand and fixing the collar of her plaid shirt. “She can’t cry incest. We’re not related, and we aren’t even the same species. It’s a miracle I managed to get you pregnant in the first place.”

 

Alex raised her head so Kara would have better access to her collar.

 

“You know mom doesn’t see it that way. She’s going to call over an exorcist or something; I can already see it.” Alex groaned and leaned her forehead against Kara’s shoulder. This was going to be a disaster.

 

“Alex, your mom is an atheist,” Kara reminded her, gently running her nails along the back of Alex’s neck. “It might take her some time to come around, but there’s nothing she can do. We’re both adults and we made the decision to… you know… have sex… and now we’re making the decision to raise a child together.”

 

Even though they’d both been drunk during their one night stand, Kara did have a point. No matter what her mother would say, Alex knew that she and Kara would get through it. She just wished she didn’t have to be so goddamn scared of her mother’s opinion. Even after that talk they’d had a couple of months ago, Alex still sometimes felt like her mother expected only the best from her.

 

“Thanks for the pep talk,” Alex mumbled as she pulled away, rubbing her eyes and straightening out her shoulders. 

 

“Anytime,” Kara replied, giving Alex a wink and a kiss on the cheek.

 

Together, they walked onto the porch.

 

-

 

Dinner was a mostly quiet affair, in which Alex and Kara sat opposite one another while Eliza sat at the head of the table. She’d made a pretty decent meal, even though Alex’s dad had always been the better cook. 

 

Alex wondered if he still would be, after they rescued him from Cadmus.

 

“So,” Alex’s mom said after she’d wiped her mouth with her napkin, “you told me on the phone that the two of you have something important to discuss with me.” She smiled at them both, and Alex felt the anxiety bubble dangerously in her stomach. “I’m all ears.”

 

Constantly having to tell people about her and Kara’s single night together and the unforeseen consequences was making Alex more than a little weary. 

 

Maybe that was why she barely even hesitated before speaking. If she treated it like a band-aid, maybe the pain would be over sooner.

 

“Kara and I are having a baby together,” she said quickly, putting down her cutlery and wiping her hands. “You're going to be a grandma in a couple of months. It’s still pretty early, but we've decided to keep it.” She chanced a look at her mother, whose facial expression was carefully blank. “I’m pregnant.”

 

When it was obvious that she was done, Eliza turned to Kara and gave her a smile.

 

“It’s good of you to help your sister take care of this child, Kara,” she said, reaching out and patting Kara’s hand, while Alex furrowed her brows. “Even though I thought I’d taught you better than to have unprotected sex, Alexandra. Who’s the father? Someone you work with?” 

 

Her mother didn't want to see the truth. Alex should have been prepared for that. She should have been more direct. 

 

“I’m the father, Eliza,” Kara interjected, before shaking her head. “I mean the mother. I’m the other mother. We ran a scan at the Fortress.” 

 

Frowning, Eliza looked from Alex to Kara. 

 

“But how is that possible? Did you get mixed up in some kind of new DEO experiment? Is there no way to reverse this?” She seemed desperate to make sense of the situation in a way that didn't involve the most obvious answer. 

 

It would have been an easy out. Telling her mother that there had been some sort of malfunction that had caused Alex and Kara to make a baby. But Alex didn't want her child’s life to be based on a lie, even one like this.

 

“Kara and I slept together, mom, that's how I got pregnant,” she said decisively, leaving no room for misinterpretation. “And we're keeping the baby, because we both want it. I moved into Kara’s apartment three weeks ago.”

 

To her credit, Eliza didn't explode. Instead, she gave Kara another smile.

 

“Would you excuse us for a second, Kara?” Her tone was friendly, but Alex knew better. This was nothing but the calm before the storm. She knew the subtle signs of body language that told her her mother was furious.

 

“Alex didn't do anything wrong,” Kara protested, steadfastly refusing to get off her chair. “If you want to be angry at her, you need to be angry at me, too.” A second later, Alex felt her right calf being enveloped by Kara’s feet. Even though they were sitting apart, Kara still tried to be there for Alex. “There’s nothing to be angry about anyway, because we didn't know I could get Alex pregnant.”

 

Eliza’s calm facade was slowly starting to crack.

 

“Honey, that’s not what I’m angry about,” she told Kara, squeezing her arm again. “I’m just disappointed that Alex would take advantage of you like that.”

 

The words were like a slap in the face, and Alex barely knew how she was going to defend herself this time. Had she taken advantage? They’d both been drunk, but she hadn't talked Kara into it, had she?

 

Before she could say a word, Kara scowled.

 

“Alex did not take advantage of me,” she said furiously, pulling her arm out of Eliza’s grip. “It was my idea to have sex and I wanted everything that Alex gave me.” She was shaking a little, and it was clear to Alex that this conversation with Eliza about her disappointment towards Alex had been brewing for a while.

 

“Kara, honey,” Eliza started again, but Kara wouldn't have it.

 

“No, Eliza,” she said, reaching across the table and taking Alex’s hand. “Alex and I did absolutely nothing wrong.” She squeezed Alex’s fingers. “I love you and I’m thankful for everything you've done for me, but if you can't accept that Alex and I made a beautiful person together, then we can't be around you right now.”

 

Without another word, Kara got up from her chair and walked around the table to help Alex to her feet.

 

“I’ll call you in a few days,” Kara told Alex’s mom, then she took Alex’s hand and pulled her into the hallway. 

 

A few minutes later, they were gone.

 

-

 

After they’d gone to bed, Alex lay on her back and stared up at the dark ceiling. She’d known that her mother would react poorly, and yet the encounter had made her feel terrible. She probably should have been used to it by now.

 

“Are you still thinking about what she said?” Kara asked, reaching out and under the blanket and stroking Alex’s hip bone. 

 

“Yeah,” Alex confessed, raising her hand and rubbing her eyes. 

 

“She’s wrong,” Kara whispered, scooting closer and leaning up on her left arm so she could look down at Alex. “You didn't take advantage of me. I wanted to sleep with you. I know we didn't really talk about it after, but I don't regret it.”

 

Alex hummed, and rubbed her eyes some more.

 

“I mean it, Alex,” Kara said, lifting her right hand and placing it on Alex’s sternum. “I asked  _ you _ , remember? I asked you if you’d take care of me. And you did.” Even in the darkness, Alex could see the emotions swirling behind Kara's eyes. “You always take care of me.” 

 

Alex could have sworn Kara was moving closer. 

 

Leaning in.

 

Closing her eyes…

 

“Supergirl, you're needed at DEO headquarters,” Kara's special radio suddenly squawked, making Kara pull away and turn towards her bedside table. “A dangerous Fort Rozz prisoner was sighted downtown. Request immediate assistance.”

 

Kara was in her suit before Alex could even blink. 

 

“I’ll be back later,” Kara said regretfully. “Try to get some sleep.”

 

And without another word, she was gone.

 

-

 

Alex didn't fall asleep until Kara had come back to her.

 

-

 

There was a bump. 

 

She poked at it.

 

There was definitely a bump. 

 

“Kara?” Alex called out from the bathroom, still looking down at herself in Kara’s full-length mirror.  _ Her _ full-length mirror. She really needed to stop differentiating between their stuff. 

 

“What’s up? Everything okay?” Kara called back, seconds before she shuffled into the bathroom. Her hair was disheveled and she was still wearing her breakfast foods pajamas since the two of them had just gotten up. “Anything I can do to help?”

 

“No, just come over here,” Alex said, perhaps a little impatiently. She waved her hand until Kara stopped next to her. “Look.” She pulled up her t-shirt, trying not to notice Kara’s immediate blush. “You can actually start to see something.”

 

Kara blinked, then her face transformed from one of embarrassment into one of wonder as she crouched down to get a better look at the bump.

 

“Guess it’s finally time to say goodbye to my abs,” Alex joked, a shiver running down her spine when Kara placed her hand on the bump. “I just hope I can get them back once the kid’s out.” She tried not to move when Kara nuzzled the bump with her nose and pressed a kiss against it. 

 

“I know you’ll look beautiful no matter what,” Kara whispered, before she wrapped both arms around Alex’s waist and laid her ear against the bump. Then she made a happy little squealing noise. “I can hear the heartbeat.” 

 

They’d heard the heartbeat before at their first ultrasound, but Kara still got excited every time she got to listen to it. 

 

“I love you,” Kara sighed happily. Her eyes were closed and Alex could clearly see her serene facial expression in the mirror. The words made her heart flutter, even now. “So much. You and our baby.” 

 

“I know,” Alex murmured, running her hands through Kara’s hair. “We love you, too.”

 

-

 

“No,” Alex said, trying and failing to pull one of her tight tank tops over her growing belly. “We're not naming our child after your favorite  _ Grey’s Anatomy _ character.” She’d already been forced to buy pants with an elastic waistband and now her tank tops wouldn't cooperate? Life was unfair. 

 

“Why not?” Kara argued, looking down at the list of names she’d made this morning. “Bailey is a good name! And it works for both girls and boys and anything in between or outside.” 

 

Alex had already had to veto Alexandra Jr. just because Kara wanted to name their child Lexie.

 

“Let me rephrase.  _ My _ child is not going to be named after a television show.” Alex pulled off the tank top and reached for one of her t-shirts instead. Maybe that one wouldn't be too small to fit her. “And it’s way too early to talk about this anyway.” She pulled the t-shirt over her baby bump and smiled when it fit. “We can talk about it in a few months.”

 

Huffing, Kara put down her list, and got to her feet. 

 

Stopping in front of Alex, she placed one hand on either side of the belly and leaned down to press her lips against the corner of Alex’s mouth. Alex didn't know if Kara had meant her kiss to be this teasing, but Alex suddenly felt like it had gotten very hard to breathe. 

 

“I’ll let you shelf this conversation,” Kara whispered, her hands massaging the baby bump and making Alex feel weak in the knees. “But only because you look so cute with this belly.” She leaned down once more, her lips lingering on Alex’s cheek. 

 

The whole encounter made Alex feel out of sorts.

 

-

 

“Danvers! Looking mighty fine!” 

 

When Alex turned her head, she made eye contact with Maggie Sawyer and an involuntary smile spread over Alex’s lips. She certainly hadn’t expected to see Maggie here at the local furniture store, but it was a pleasant surprise. 

 

Kara didn’t seem too happy.

 

“Hey, Sawyer.” Alex leaned forward to give her a hug in greeting, made only slightly awkward by the ever-expanding baby bump. “Feels like I haven't seen you in ages.” Even though they texted regularly and talked on the phone, Alex missed working with her new unofficial partner. She missed working in general, and there had been more than one occasion when she’d regretted her decision to stay pregnant.

 

But those feelings never lasted for long.

 

“Hey, Kara,” Maggie said, her smile almost mischievous as she reached out to give Kara a hug as well. It was as though she was privy to some knowledge that Alex didn't have. “What are you guys here for?”

 

“We're looking for a crib,” Kara answered before Alex could so much as open her mouth. Then, out of the blue, she wrapped her arm around Alex’s waist and held her close. She put her other hand on Alex’s belly. There was something almost possessive about her posture, and Alex furrowed her brows. She’d rarely seen Kara like this.

 

“That’s nice,” Maggie said, still with that knowing look on her face. “I’m looking for a new couch myself. I let one of my friends crash on it recently and she had a little accident with her powers. Incinerated the whole damn thing.” 

 

Alex frowned.

 

“Man, that’s too bad. That couch was something special,” she said, remember how soft and comfortable the two-seater had been. During one of their casual movie nights, Alex had spent a good chunk of time on the thing. 

 

At her words, Kara stiffened and Maggie looked to be on the verge of snickering. 

 

“I know,” Maggie continued, winking at them both. “Anyway, I’m going to let the two of you get back to shopping for a great crib. Let me know if there's anything I can do to help. I’m pretty good at building furniture.” 

 

Alex was on the verge of asking her to come with them, but Kara seemed to sense her intention even before Alex had fully formed the thought.

 

“Alright, well, it was nice to see you,” Kara said quickly, smiling a bit too brightly to be genuine before she pulled both Alex and their shopping cart with her and in the opposite direction of the couches. Even though the way she was walking would mean a massive detour on their way to the cribs and other baby goods and furniture.

 

Alex heard Maggie chuckle behind them and turned her head to shrug at her.

 

Maggie winked a second time.

 

As soon as they were out of earshot, Alex confronted Kara about her behavior.

 

“What the hell was that about?” She asked, taking the shopping cart away from Kara and pushing it herself. “Why were you so rude to Maggie?” They were walking slowly now, and Kara was obviously pretending to be shopping. “We could have at least walked to the couches with her. I haven't seen her in a while.”

 

Kara - who was clearly pretending not to notice the disappointed undertone to Alex’s words - spent way too much time observing a particularly ugly lamp. 

 

“Kara!” Alex raised her voice only a little. She didn't want to draw too much attention to them while she chewed out her sister. 

 

When Kara looked up from the ugly lamp, her face was twisted into an expression of guilt. Then, it changed to one of determination.

 

“This is supposed to be our afternoon,” she defended herself, squeezing the ugly lamp perhaps a little too tightly. Before it could break, Alex put it back onto the shelf. “Just you and me, picking something out for our baby.” 

 

She pouted, and suddenly, Alex’s brain connected the dots. 

 

“You're jealous,” she said, a note of something akin to awe mixed in with the surprise before Alex could wrangle down the emotion. 

 

Kara was  _ jealous _ . 

 

Of  _ Maggie _ .

 

It made a certain amount of sense. After all, Maggie had been the one who had helped Alex be true to herself. The first woman that Alex had ever let herself be in love with (before Maggie had said no, of course). 

 

The thought filled Alex’s stomach with butterflies.

 

“I’m not jealous,” Kara sputtered with an unconvincing laugh. Her voice was higher than usual, and she pushed past Alex, taking the shopping cart with her. “I just want to spend some quality time with my-- with you. Without anyone else. There's nothing wrong with that.”

 

A soft smile spread over Alex’s lips, and she slipped her arms around Kara’s bicep after catching up to her.

 

“There’s nothing to be jealous about,” she whispered, leaning up and pressing a kiss against Kara’s cheek. “I promise.”

 

Kara blushed. 

 

-

 

“You are my favorite person,” Alex moaned as she started shoving the first slice of pineapple pizza into her mouth. 

 

Eating usually wasn't allowed in the lab, but no one wanted to get on Alex’s bad side. They all knew she could still kick their asses, even with the baby bump in the way.

 

“Don't let Kara hear that,” Winn replied, reaching out for a slice of pizza only to have his hand slapped away. “Ow, jeez. I go out of my way go get you this very special pizza from the one place in town that doesn't deliver and this is what you give me? Abuse?” 

 

He shook out his hand just as she started in on the second slice.

 

“You know, I used to hate pineapple pizza, but ever since I’ve been pregnant…” She bit off another chunk and chewed vigorously. This was exactly what she needed to eat right now, and her body knew it. “Pineapple is one of Kara's favorites.” 

 

Winn smirked.

 

“Guess now we know for  _ sure _ whose baby this is,” he teased her, earning a kick to the shin for his comment.

 

“You try feeding a half-Kryptonian baby on a regular human diet,” she said, finishing off the first half of the pizza. “It’s like this kid is a tiny vacuum.” She patted her belly gently and looked down at it with a no doubt sugary sweet expression. No matter how much she complained, she knew she loved the little nugget already.

 

Before Winn could make another comment, a commotion broke out in the arrival platform downstairs, clearly visible through the many glass walls.

 

Throwing down the half-finished piece of pineapple pizza, Alex wiped her hand on her pants and pulled out her gun. Clearly, one of the aliens had gone rogue and was wreaking havoc on her colleagues, and Alex wouldn't sit around and do nothing while that happened.

 

“Alex, no!” Winn tried to hold her back, wrapping his hand around her arm. “You’re pregnant, remember?”

 

Alex was torn. 

 

She wanted to go out there and  _ help _ , but Winn was right. She was pregnant and the last thing she wanted was to injure her baby. The kid might be half-Kryptonian, but Alex wasn't. If she got hurt, she might lose the baby, or suffer from preeclampsia. Alex didn't want to risk that. 

 

At least, that had been her thought process  _ before _ she saw a blur of red, yellow and blue being hurled across the room.

 

“Kara!” she yelled, pulling free from Winn and running outside and down the stairs to where she’d seen Kara before she’d vanished inside a wall. Curling a protective arm around her belly, Alex slid to a stop in front of a crumpled, dirty Kara, who was having trouble standing up. “No, no, no, Kara!” 

 

Falling to her knees, Alex helped Kara into a sitting position, stroking dirt and debris out of her hair and away from her face. 

 

“Alex? What are you doing down here?” Kara was frantic now, her eyes locked on something behind Alex. “Alex, you need to get out of here. Go!” There was terror in her eyes, and she pushed at Alex’s shoulders. 

 

“I’m not leaving you alone down here,” Alex protested, curling her arms around Kara’s body and holding her close. “I’m going to get you out of here.” She had half a mind to carry Kara in her arms bridal style, but then again, she felt like the belly would probably get in the way of that pretty definitively.

 

Before she could make a decision, she heard a loud roar and looked behind herself. 

 

When she looked up, she locked eyes with a big brown monster with the face of… a dinosaur? Alex would have laughed if the situation hadn’t seemed so utterly dire. It was smaller than she thought, but it looked all too ready to kill. 

 

Just as she remembered that she had a gun in her hand, the humanoid alien with the head of a dinosaur reached back with its long clawed fingers.

 

Without thought, Alex threw herself over Kara, shielding her with her body so whatever the alien wanted to do wouldn't hurt her. 

 

What she felt next was a strange sensation.

 

It reminded her of second grade, when Dave Johnson had tried to throw a rock at her and it had glanced harmlessly off her shoulder blade without hurting at all. Dave hadn't been very good at throwing. Whatever the alien had done, Alex could feel it, but at the same time… it didn't hurt. Didn't pierce her skin. 

 

Glancing up from Kara, Alex watched as the alien reached back yet again and shot another pair of… claws? Bones? At her back. They looked sharp, and she would have expected them to slash her to bits or lodge themselves in her back. Instead, they glanced harmlessly off her skin. Her shirt was ruined, but the skin beneath was fine. 

 

The alien seemed just as surprised as she was.

 

Hefting herself to her feet, Alex didn't wait for the alien to strike again. Instead, she used the element of surprise to reach back and punch the lizard person directly into its scaly face. 

 

She expected it to hurt, but it didn't. 

 

The entire floor was silent. Then, in a matter of seconds, two dozen agents joined her and subdued the alien while Alex soothingly rubbed her belly and turned back to Kara, who had gotten back to her feet and was staring at her with awe and confusion. 

 

“Are you okay?” Alex asked, walking away from the alien and her colleagues and straight into Kara’s arms. “I’m sorry I got involved. I saw you getting hurt and my brain just sort of turned itself off.” She held on tightly to Kara, even with the bump in between them.

 

“I think we need to go back to the Fortress,” Kara whispered, pressing her lips against Alex’s temple and rocking them back and forth. They both knew Alex probably shouldn't have survived a direct hit from those alien spikes. 

 

And yet she had.

 

-

 

“We have another question,” Kara called out to her uncle, Alex’s hand clasped firmly in her own. They’d left for the Fortress as soon as they’d debriefed J’onn about what had happened. He hadn't been pleased that Alex had put herself in danger, and Alex had been forced to apologize profusely. 

 

When he’d calmed down, she’d allowed him to place his hand on her stomach to check for himself that the baby was really fine. He was one of the few people who were ever given permission to touch the belly. Kara was the only one who didn't have to ask.

 

But Kara also spent entire evenings with her head next to the baby bump, whispering to it in both Kryptonese and English. And some of the other languages she had picked up over the years. It didn’t just soothe the baby, it also made Alex fall asleep every night without fail.

 

“What do you wish to know, Kara?” Jor-El’s disembodied voice echoed along the crystal walls.

 

Shuffling a little closer to Alex, Kara leaned her cheek against her sister’s head.

 

“Alex was hit by some Dregario stingers and they just bounced off her skin,” she said loudly, letting go of Alex’s hand to wrap her arm around Alex’s waist instead. She was most likely seeking the reassurance that Alex was really fine. “Can you tell us why that happened?”

 

This time, there was no beam of light and no Kryptonian symbols, which probably meant that Jor-El already knew the answer. 

 

“Alexandra’s body is adapting to the needs of her child,” Jor-El started, his voice steady and deep, as always. “The Kryptonian cells in the child’s body are naturally more powerful than the human cells under Earth’s yellow sun, and in order to avoid damage or harm, Krypton included a failsafe.”

 

Alex’s hand went instinctively to her belly.

 

“What do you mean?” Alex asked the Fortress, leaning herself further into Kara’s embrace and feeling immensely reassured when Kara’s hand covered her own.

 

“Krypton was a diverse and sprawling world,” Jor-El explained, sounding almost wistful. “There are many yellow suns across the universe that our people traveled to, and many places where we were more powerful than the races we encountered.”

 

Furrowing her brows, Alex wondered what his tangent had to do with her question. 

 

“We knew that any cross-species children being conceived might result in dangerous pregnancies, so we changed our DNA,” Jor-El continued, causing Kara to hug Alex just a little bit tighter, as though the thought of their baby hurting Alex with its strength hadn’t yet occurred to her. It had to Alex.

 

“So ever since I’ve been pregnant…” Alex wondered aloud, her hand growing clammy in the thick gloves she was wearing. “Our baby has been turning me into a Kryptonian?” It sounded absolutely crazy.

 

“No,” Jor-El responded instantly, clearly picking up on the note of worry in her voice. “You have simply been enhanced to ensure your own survival. All species have a great potential to thrive. You are still quite human.”

 

Relief swept over Alex at these words. She had no idea how she would have felt if he’d confirmed her worries. 

 

“Is the change permanent?” Kara asked, her boots making crunching noises in the snow as she stepped closer to Alex so they were pressed against one another from head to toe. “Or is the impenetrable skin thing only temporary?”

 

Having at least part of Kara’s powers wouldn’t be so bad, now that Alex thought about it. She could help Kara more efficiently out in the field if she didn’t have to worry about bullets. She wondered why Lois hadn’t told her about this change during their conversation.

 

“Alexandra has changed on a molecular level. Attempting a reversal of the enhancement is not advised.” 

 

His words made Alex smile.

 

-

 

“As soon as we’re back at the DEO, I’m going to tell J’onn to put me back on active duty,” Alex said happily, humming as she danced around the kitchen. They’d come back from the Fortress a while ago, but Alex had fallen asleep on the way and Kara had left her to snore in their bed while she went to the DEO to give a report about Alex’s status.

 

At her words, Kara stopped cutting carrots and looked up.

 

“No you’re not,” she said, putting down the knife she was holding and wiping her hands on a towel next to her. “We talked about this. With other aliens and Cadmus running around, it’s too dangerous for you out on missions.”

 

Shrugging her shoulders, Alex leaned against the kitchen island next to Kara.

 

“That was before we knew I was enhanced by the kid,” she pointed out, picking up one of the carrots and biting into it. “I was a puny human before. Now I’m like…” She waved her arms around. “ _ Supermom _ or something.”

 

Kara’s expression didn’t get any friendlier.

 

“No,” she said, getting up from the barstool she’d been sitting on and crossing her arms over her chest, towering over Alex. “I’m not going to let you go back on active duty.” She would have looked more menacing if she hadn’t been wearing her fluffiest pair of pajamas.

 

“You’re not going to  _ let  _ me?” Alex asked with a heavily sarcastic undertone.

 

Face flushing a deep scarlet, Kara took a step closer to Alex, her expression determined despite the blush. Alex had to admit there was a certain level of sexiness about Kara’s assertive side, something that Alex had picked up on more and more as her pregnancy progressed and her hormones slowly started spiraling out of control.

 

“I’m not trying to dictate what you can and can’t do,” Kara said quietly, her arms still crossed tightly over her chest. She was shaking a little as she took another step forward so they were almost nose to nose. “But that is  _ my _ child in there. And I’m going to make damn sure that my child and my--” She trailed off.

 

“Your what?” Alex teased her, mimicking Kara’s pose, the half-eaten carrot held loosely in her left hand. 

 

Taking Alex’s words as a challenge, Kara placed her hands on Alex’s waist and pulled her close, the baby bump the only thing keeping them separated.

 

“My  _ woman _ isn’t going to get hurt,” Kara said intently.

 

“Your  _ woman _ ? Really?” Alex threw the carrot onto the table, wiped her hand on her sweatpants and placed her fingers over Kara’s on her waist. “Since when?” She was treading on thin ice and she knew it. This was one part of their relationship they hadn’t addressed.

 

Leaning down, Kara pressed her lips against Alex’s cheek.

 

“I love you,” she whispered, her breath warm on Alex’s skin, making Alex close her eyes and feel weak in the knees. Damn pregnancy hormones. Kara’s proximity was driving her crazy, and the smell of her shampoo wasn’t helping. “Please don’t go back to work. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you and our baby.”

 

Alex wanted to cry emotional manipulation, but she knew why Kara didn’t want her out in the field. If their roles had been reversed, Alex likely would have felt the same. But that didn’t mean that Alex wasn’t still feeling guilty about sending Kara out into danger on her own.

 

“I feel useless when I’m just shut up in the lab all day,” Alex replied, moving her hands along Kara’s forearms, fingers sliding under the sleeves to seek out soft skin. “It doesn’t feel right to send you out there all by yourself.”

 

The fact that there were other agents helping to protect Kara - like Vasquez, for example - was totally immaterial to Alex’s argument. And if Kara brought it up, Alex wouldn’t be held responsible for kicking Kara in the shin.

 

With her eyes closed, Kara moved so she could press their foreheads against one another, her nose sliding softly against Alex’s. 

 

“You’re not useless,” she murmured, her breath even more distracting now that it was hitting Alex’s mouth. “You’re the most important part of the team.” Her fingers slipped under Alex’s t-shirt. “And if you don’t stop trash-talking my woman, I’m going to be very upset.”

 

Grinning, Alex dug her nails into Kara’s skin.

 

“That whole ‘my woman’ thing is not going to be a  _ thing _ , alright? Besides, people might find it a bit-- mmh,” Alex trailed off, completely caught off guard by the sudden pressure of Kara’s soft lips against her mouth. 

 

With her eyes squeezed shut, Alex shuddered as Kara kissed her gently. 

 

“I don’t care what people think,” Kara whispered in between kisses, her hands rubbing circles on Alex’s back. The warmth of her hands made Alex want to melt into a puddle of goo on the floor, even though she never would have admitted it.

 

-

 

After it was over, Alex lay panting on her back, her arm draped over her eyes.

 

She felt sweaty and tired, but at least her hormones had calmed down somewhat.

 

“You want something to eat? I’m starving,” Kara whined, her hand already on her cellphone. Looking out from under her arm, Alex watched Kara’s naked back as she pulled up the numbers of their favorite take-out restaurants on her phone. “Are you in the mood for anything?”

 

They still hadn’t talked.

 

But at least now Alex knew that their one night of amazing drunken sex hadn’t been a fluke. Stone-cold sober sex with Kara was somehow even better, because Alex had felt everything and would likely remember even the smallest details. 

 

Especially Kara’s goddamn mouth.

 

How the hell was Alex supposed to be thinking about food when that mouth had been... well... eating  _ her  _ just a few minutes ago?

 

Thankfully, the baby seemed to be adjusting just fine to the changes in their parents’ relationship, as her belly suddenly rumbled loudly. 

 

“Chinese food tonight,” Alex said quietly, not moving one bit as she felt Kara’s hand reach out to rub her stomach. She especially tried not to think about the fact that it was the hand that had just been inside of her. 

 

This was going to be very complicated.

 

“I’ll order tons of potstickers, I promise,” Kara teased, leaning back and pressing a long, loving kiss against Alex’s lips. “You can jump in the shower. I’ll be there in a second.” Kara’s body looked perfect like this, and her disheveled hair was making Alex weak in the knees all over again. 

 

“Alright,” Alex agreed, pushing herself into a sitting position and shuffling into the bathroom just as Kara dialed the Chinese restaurant from around the corner and ordered a massive amount of food. 

 

With a short glance behind her, Alex confirmed that Kara was indeed watching her ass as she walked away, and felt equal amounts shy, excited, and worried.

 

Sure, fine, they’d had sex again, but what now?

 

Alex didn’t have the best track record of being an adult about her feelings.

 

Biting her bottom lip, she turned on the shower and looked at herself in the full-length mirror while she waited for the water to warm up. Seeing herself pregnant was definitely something she’d never anticipated in a million years, and she still wasn’t sure if she liked the look or not.

 

“They’ll be here in about half an hour,” Kara purred from behind Alex, seconds before her strong arms wrapped themselves around Alex’s body and held her close. “That should give us enough time to get ready.”

 

Humming in agreement, Alex closed her eyes and enjoyed the moment, letting go of her worries and frustrations for a second. Because this was  _ Kara _ . No matter what happened, whether they decided to get together or not, Kara would never abandon her. They would raise this baby together, no matter what.

 

-

 

The first time the baby kicked, Alex dropped a very heavy and expensive piece of equipment.

 

Winn yelped in surprise when the shiny metal object crashed to the floor and fell apart after Alex had spent weeks putting it together. His first instinct seemed to be to run to her side, voice frantic and shaky as he called out for Kara.

 

“Are you okay? Is it the baby?” he asked quickly, hovering around her with his hands outstretched but seemingly unwilling to encroach on her personal space. The one time he’d tried to touch her belly, Alex had given him a glare so fierce he hadn’t been able to sleep for a week. Or so he’d said.

 

“What’s wrong?” Kara’s voice boomed through the lab. She’d super sped inside, the force of her impact knocking Winn on his ass. “Is everything okay?” 

 

With a shaky smile, Alex grabbed Kara’s hand and placed it on her stomach. 

 

Kara’s face went from worry to wonder in less than a second as she felt the strong, determined kicks under both of their palms. And even though Alex had sworn to herself that she wouldn’t cry openly at the DEO during her pregnancy, she couldn’t keep the tears at bay. 

 

-

 

When Winn finally managed to get back on his feet, he was allowed to feel for the kicks as well.

 

But only for a second.

 

-

 

“I was thinking we could maybe call Eliza about the baby shower,” Kara asked tentatively, her hands moving up and down Alex’s feet in a comforting rhythm. “It’s still a couple of months away, so that would give her some more time to think about what she said.”

 

Alex was sitting on the other end of the couch with her back propped up by pillows and a book about being first time parents in her hands. 

 

The baby shower was being pulled together by Lucy and Maggie, who had hit it off quite well after Alex had introduced them to one another. As far as Alex knew, they’d tried to invite half the DEO, before Kara had stepped in to remind them of the size of their apartment. 

 

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea,” Alex murmured, putting a page marker into her book and closing it. “I think we should give her some time to stew on her own. You can text her the date of the shower, if you want, but,” she shrugged, “she was still so angry the last time I called her.”

 

A few weeks ago, Alex had scraped up the rest of her confidence and had called her mother about their dinner together. She’d also intended on mentioning that her mother’s grandchild had started kicking, but she hadn’t even gotten that far.

 

Her mother was just as stubborn as she was, and if the almost thirty years on this planet had taught Alex anything, it was that Eliza Danvers wouldn’t be ready to talk until  _ she  _ decided she was ready to talk.

 

Humming, Kara moved her massage up to Alex’s calves.

 

“I’m sorry she’s being so difficult.” Kara’s fingers kneaded Alex’s muscles just right, and Alex closed her eyes in bliss. Her feet and legs had been killing her recently. “And I’m sorry she’s taking it all out on you.”

 

“Nothing new,” Alex whispered back, her hands settling on her stomach after she pushed her book onto the coffee table next to her. She could probably fall asleep like this, with Kara making her feel good. “She’ll come around eventually. She always does.”

 

Kara’s hands slid up Alex’s leg and onto her inner thigh.

 

“There’s one other thing I want to talk about,” she murmured, pressing kisses against Alex’s knee. “Which you’ve been avoiding like the plague.”

 

Alex groaned.

 

“Because it’s humiliating,” she complained, spreading her legs so Kara could settle in between them more comfortably. Kara’s fingers on her inner thigh were more than a little distracting, but Alex didn’t move away.

 

“There’s nothing humiliating about taking a birthing class, Alex,” Kara countered, reaching up with her hands and placing them over Alex’s fingers. “I know you want to do this all by yourself, but the people there can help us.”

 

She pressed a couple of kisses against Alex’s belly.

 

“And I was hoping that… maybe…” Kara’s fingers drew shapes on and around Alex’s hands. 

 

“What?” Alex asked gently, turning one of her hands over and catching Kara’s.

 

“Maybe we could tell people there that we’re girlfriends?” Kara’s eyes were trained on their intertwined fingers, and the world seemed to stand still while Alex took in her words. “I know we haven’t talked about it, really, but…” 

 

But they’d been having sex multiple times a week now, and had taken to sharing kisses around the apartment. And no matter how much Alex pretended that it didn’t mean anything while she tried to untangle her own emotions, she knew it would never be true.

 

“I was thinking that maybe we could use the class as a baby step,” Kara continued, drawing shapes and letters onto Alex’s stomach with her free hand. It was clear that she was trying to make things as easy as possible for Alex, and the thought was heartwarming.

 

“But the birthing class wouldn’t start until my third trimester,” Alex mentioned with a raised eyebrow. She’d read up on the classes online, and her third trimester was still quite a few weeks away. “Maybe we could… you know… start a little closer to home.”

 

Kara’s eyes finally snapped up.

 

“Go on a date or two… Spend some time figuring out what it would even mean for us to… be dating.” Alex’s voice was shaking just a bit. Because dating Kara, being open about her feelings with Kara… What if Alex messed it up? 

 

“We’ll take it slow,” Kara promised, leaning up and giving Alex a sweet kiss. “I would love to go out on a date with you. Before the whole pregnancy thing, I was actually working up the courage to talk to you about it.”

 

With a tremulous smile, Alex squeezed her sister’s hand. 

 

“I can’t believe it took us this long,” Kara joked, pressing their foreheads against one another.

 

“I can,” Alex whispered, reaching up with her hands and cupping Kara’s cheeks. “It took me almost thirty years to figure out that I wasn’t attracted to men. I’m not exactly the most perceptive person.”

 

Grinning, Kara draped herself over Alex without putting any weight on her.

 

“But I’m a super mature and responsible Kryptonian with an awesome brain,” Kara teased, leaning in and kissing Alex’s cheek a couple of times while Alex wrapped both arms around Kara’s body. “I should have figured it all out way in advance.”

 

Alex didn’t dignify that with a response.

 

-

 

“Alright,” J’onn said slowly, checking off another word on the clipboard in his hand. “We have… a green onesie, a red and blue onesie, a Supergirl onesie…” He frowned down at his notes. “Someone bought a Yoda cap?”

 

Alex rolled her eyes and moved around on her office chair.

 

Winn, J’onn and James were sifting through the clothes and other gifts Alex and Kara had already received or bought pre-baby shower, so that they could let the other guests know what not to get them. 

 

“Kara bought that herself,” Alex supplied, getting up from the chair and lumbering over to the couch. Her back was hurting like it never had before, and Alex hoped that her sis-  _ girlfriend  _ would be home from her impromptu rescue mission soon. “She’s big into  _ Star Wars _ .”

 

“If you don’t like Yoda, I bet Winn could make the kid a Martian cap instead,” James joked, giving Alex a wink, which made her grin. If she was honest with herself, imagining her child in a tiny Martian cap was more than adorable. 

 

“You may have to transform and sit still for that, though,” Winn answered, obviously not picking up on the teasing undertone in James’s voice. “Or you could take a picture that I can take home. My knitting skills aren’t as great as my sewing skills, but I can try.”

 

When J’onn didn’t outright deny the request, Alex had a feeling they’d be getting a proper Martian cap for their baby pretty soon. The thought made her place her hands on her belly to rub it gently. She knew J’onn would love their baby like his own, and she could already see her child in his big arms.

 

“Does the Supergirl onesie have a cape?” Alex asked, stuffing a pillow behind her back and trying not to screw up her face when her back sent another shock of pain up her body. Just because her kid had enhanced her skin and resilience didn’t mean that Alex wasn’t still feeling some shitty pregnancy symptoms.

 

Just as James showed her the cool onesie, his smile wide and happy, Kara flew in through the window, landing gracefully on the carpet and giving them all a wave. Her eyes lingered on Alex for a second longer than the rest, before she super sped into their bedroom to change into something more comfortable.

 

“I stopped the bank robbery,” Kara said casually as she strolled back into the room, sitting down next to Alex and kissing her cheek. 

 

They still hadn’t told the others that they were trying the whole dating thing, which was remarkably similar to what they’d been doing up until that point. Only that now neither one of them needed to worry about whether or not the other wanted them back. It was fascinating how much more relaxed Alex had been feeling ever since their talk. 

 

“What did I miss?” Kara asked, her hand instinctively going to Alex’s stomach. 

 

“People have been criticizing your buying habits,” Alex replied automatically, trying to snuggle into Kara’s side and wincing when her back spasmed in new pain. Moving wasn’t very advisable at this time, it seemed like.

 

Picking up on her discomfort immediately, Kara gently pushed Alex forward on the couch so she could get behind her and start massaging while Alex tried not to notice that the other three were watching them with veiled interest. 

 

Alex and Kara had always been affectionate, but apparently they hadn’t been quite as successful at hiding the new developments in their relationship. There really wasn’t any point to keeping it under wraps, but Alex worried constantly that  _ someone  _ in their lives would shun them. 

 

Then again, if their friends hadn’t left them behind for having sex and then proceeding to have a kid together, the fact that they were now dating really shouldn’t be too much of a shock for them at this point. 

 

Biting her bottom lip, Alex figured she might as well tell them.

 

And Kara didn’t have any problem with it. 

 

Really, it was Alex who worried the most.

 

“Just so you know,” Alex said slowly, working on thinking up the best way to say it. It was difficult, because these three men were part of her family now, and Alex had a notoriously hard time getting along with family. “Kara and I started dating recently.”

 

Kara’s movements stopped for a moment.

 

In contrast, J’onn, James, and Winn barely seemed to bat an eyelash at the news.

 

“Well, it was about time,” James finally said, folding a small yellow onesie and noting it on J’onn’s clipboard. “We’ve been wondering how long it would take you to finally figure it out.” He stretched out his fist for Winn, who bumped it with his own.

 

Alex scowled.

 

“If I could get up right now, I would punch you,” she said, patting Kara’s leg until her girlfriend started massaging again. 

 

When James laughed and Kara hugged her close before jumping into telling them about their first date, Alex’s unhappy expression slowly melted away, until only a smile remained.

 

Never in a million years had Alex anticipated how easy this would be.

 

-

 

“Don’t worry, we’re handling everything. You just have to sit there and enjoy all the presents and games,” Maggie said with a big grin on her face, her dimples out on full display. She grabbed Alex by the arm and gently moved her back over to the couch, where Kara was sitting with a pout on her face. She’d clearly tried to help out, too.

 

Next to her, Maggie’s eight year-old daughter was napping, completely unperturbed by all the commotion around her as more and more guests started showing up. Looking down at her, Alex couldn’t help but imagine her own child looking similarly adorable in a few years.

 

“You’ve been banned, too?” Kara asked, patting the couch next to her and wrapping an arm around Alex when she sat down. “I asked Lucy if she wanted me to help with the decorations but she told me to get lost.” Kara’s pout somehow intensified even more. “She just wants to be alone with Vasquez.”

 

With a raised eyebrow, Alex chased off her own demons and leaned forward to kiss Kara’s pout away. It took a few attempts, but after the fifth peck, Kara finally smiled. 

 

“Maggie chased me out of the kitchen,” Alex replied, taking Kara’s hand and placing it on her own stomach. Their baby was moving around like crazy today, and Alex wondered if it had something to do with her own anxieties about the baby shower. “I don’t know if I should be thankful or offended. I probably would have burned all the snacks anyway.”

 

Grinning, Kara nuzzled the skin behind Alex’s ear. 

 

“Guess I’m going to be the cool parent with the cooking skills,” she whispered, chuckling when Alex blushed at her attention. She still wasn’t quite used to the intimate ways in which Kara had started to show affection. 

 

“And I’m going to be the cool parent with all the other skills,” Alex tried to tease, her words somewhat less pompous, because her voice was so faint and shaky. Which was probably the only reason Kara couldn’t quite bring herself to act mock-offended.

 

Instead, Kara just leaned in and gave her a small kiss.

 

When a throat was cleared behind them, Alex flinched and pulled guiltily out of the kiss. There was nothing to be guilty about, but Alex still wasn’t totally comfortable with showing affection in front of other people. Even their friends.

 

Her guilt tripled when she turned around and saw that her mother was standing awkwardly behind her, a blue rectangular gift clutched in both hands. 

 

“Mom,” Alex acknowledged her before clearing her throat. She had not expected her mother to be at the shower, since Eliza hadn’t responded to Kara’s text about the date. 

 

“Alex,” Eliza responded, looking down at Alex for a second before handing over the present. “This is for you. You might have to put it away for a few years, but I didn’t know what else you might still need.” Her words were stiff, but she was very clearly trying. “If you need financial help with anything else, let me know.”

 

Kara got to her feet before Eliza could squeeze the purse at her side to death with her grip.

 

“I’m so glad you came.” Kara’s words were warm and genuine, and Alex marveled at the way Kara could forgive and reach out. And she also didn’t miss the way her mother’s shoulders relaxed ever so slightly when Kara pulled her into a hug. “We missed you.”

 

“I missed you, too,” Eliza whispered back, both of her hands clutching Kara’s back. “I’m sorry for what I said. I took some time and…” Her eyes found Alex, who was trying to fight her tears. Goddamn pregnancy hormones. She couldn’t wait to be rid of those. “I’m sorry, Alex. I love you.”

 

Even with the belly weighing her down, Alex was on her feet in an instant, and in her mother’s and Kara’s arms a moment later.

 

“I can’t wait to meet my grandchild,” Eliza whispered, her hand cupping Alex’s cheek before she pressed a long kiss against her daughter’s hair. “I’m sorry I couldn’t see past my own problems.” 

 

With Alex well and truly bawling, Kara leaned to the side to grab the box of tissues they had to keep around living room. Watching television or movies had become a much more taxing affair for Alex’s emotions ever since the pregnancy had dialed up her sensitivity to all manner of things.

 

While Kara wiped Alex’s face, Alex grabbed her mother’s hand and placed it on her belly, directly over the spot where the baby was kicking wildly. The kicking wasn’t a pleasant feeling by any stretch of the imagination, but seeing her mother’s excited and wondrous face made it more than worth it.

 

“They’re so active,” Eliza whispered to herself, dropping to her knees so she could be closer to her grandchild. “Hello in there. I’m Eliza. I’m going to be your grandma.” She stroked Alex’s stomach and smiled tremulously. “I know you’re going to be a great scientist.”

 

With a raised eyebrow, Alex took one of the new tissues Kara was holding out to her.

 

“Mom, we’re not going to force the kid into becoming another bio-engineer,” she said, blowing her nose and stuffing the used tissue into the pocket of her jeans. 

 

Eliza shrugged.

 

“We’re also not going to discourage them,” she replied, getting back to her feet. “You’re a scientist, your parents are scientists. Kara’s father was a scientist.” She patted the belly fondly. “It could happen. And with both of your intellects combined, there’s no reason the baby wouldn’t be smart enough.” Her eyes grew soft. “The smartest little scientist on the playground. Just like you when you were little.”

 

It took everything inside of Alex not to start crying again.

 

-

 

The baby shower went off without a hitch, even though Alex hated every single game she was forced to play. If it hadn’t been for Kara’s constant excitement and close proximity, she might have decided to just throw them all out and have a nice evening in with only her closest friends and family.

 

-

 

“I can’t believe she really came,” Alex whispered in the dark, holding Kara’s hand close to her heart. They were spooning, since the only sleeping position Alex could tolerate at this point was on her side with Kara wrapped around her like a warm, comforting blanket. 

 

“I know,” Kara whispered back, placing gentle kisses on the back of Alex’s neck. “I’m glad she’s going to be around for a while.” She shuffled closer to Alex and squeezed her tightly. “Maggie’s been a big help, but I want to know what it’s going to be like to have a Danvers baby around.”

 

Snorting, Alex rolled her eyes at her girlfriend’s gentle teasing. 

 

Her mother had decided to rent a hotel room for a while to be close to Alex and Kara. It was sweet, and Alex was actually looking forward to tell her about everything that had happened recently. For once, she didn’t feel like she had to feel ashamed or like she’d somehow disappointed her mom.

 

It was a feeling Alex hoped she would someday get used to.

 

“I’m more worried about the House of El side and the state of our apartment once we’ll have a super powered mini-Kara,” Alex teased her right back, turning her head so she could smirk at her girlfriend. She didn’t expect to get a loving kiss for her troubles.

 

“I know any House of El shortcomings will be ironed out by your beautiful genes,” Kara drawled, moving her lips over Alex’s cheek and down against her jaw, where she proceeded to nibble and suck at Alex’s skin.

 

“Are you trying to get into my pants, Ms. Danvers?” Alex asked breathlessly, already feeling her body respond to her girlfriend’s ministrations. 

 

“Maybe,” Kara replied, her hand sliding from Alex’s chest down and in between her legs. “But only if Dr. Danvers is in the mood for it, too.” 

 

Alex groaned.

 

-

 

When the birth finally rolled around, Alex was more than ready to not be pregnant anymore. It had been nice for a while, knowing that there was a tiny version of herself and Kara growing inside of her, but now that her feet and back ached constantly and the belly was getting heavier and heavier, Alex was ready to actually hold their child in her arms. 

 

And she was ready to go back to  _ active duty _ .

 

She’d even allowed the birthing classes - after one pout and kiss from Kara - and so she knew what to expect in the hospital.

 

What she hadn’t been quite prepared for was the  _ pain _ . 

 

Alex had been wounded plenty of times throughout her life. Working for the DEO wasn’t exactly a walk in the park on a warm summer’s day. She’d even taken the special epidural she’d worked up herself in her own lab, and yet the contractions still felt as though her body was trying to collapse in on itself.

 

It took upwards of eight hours to get the whole thing over with, and Alex was pretty sure that the new strength her baby had given her had actually been a bad idea when she broke three of Kara’s fingers with her tight grip.

 

-

 

Waking up hours later, Alex lifted her hand and rubbed her eyes. 

 

“Hey, good morning, sleepyhead,” Kara said quietly from the chair next to the bed. Her face was radiant with happiness and she had a bundle of cloth wrapped in her arms. “Your daughter missed you while you were out.”

 

A smile spread over Alex’s face, and when she tried to sit up, J’onn was at her side immediately to help her. 

 

“I bet your daughter’s been too tired to miss much of anything,” Alex croaked as she settled onto the mountain of pillows J’onn had quickly built up behind her. When Alex looked around, she saw that her mother was standing slightly behind Kara, looking down at the sleeping bundle of joy in Kara’s arms.

 

When she was properly situated, Kara leaned over the bed and handed over their child.

 

“Good morning, Elizabeth,” Alex husked, leaning down and pressing a kiss against the sleeping baby’s forehead. She knew it was silly, but she could already see Kara’s beautiful nose and chin on her daughter’s face. “I hope mommy’s been taking good care of you while your mom was asleep.”

 

Kara fake-pouted, and Alex grinned.

 

-

 

“Who’s the cutest baby in the whole universe?” Alex asked her daughter while she bounced her up and down on her lap. “Yeah, who’s the cutest baby in the whole universe?” Elizabeth laughed and gurgled and Alex grinned. “That’s right, Lizzy, it’s you! You’re the cutest.”

 

She lifted her baby and blew a raspberry on the tiny belly, making Lizzy squeal and wiggle her legs in excitement. 

 

“It’s so weird to hear your baby voice,” Winn observed, his eyes lingering on Alex’s happy, relaxed face. 

 

“Almost makes you sound human, Danvers,” Maggie teased, leaning back on the couch and sipping on her beer. “Well done, you’re finally out of your awkward robot phase.” She held up her hand for Winn to high five, which he was only all too happy to do. 

 

Alex knew he thought Maggie was the coolest person he’d ever met.

 

“Stop teasing my girlfriend,” Kara said, even though her smiling face belied her seriousness as she plucked her daughter out of Alex’s hands and gave Lizzy’s chubby cheeks endless kisses. “Who could resist this delicious little muffin.”

 

They were having a nice evening in, all of them lounging around in front of the television. Just Kara, Alex, Maggie, and Winn. James was visiting Metropolis to spend some time with Clark and Lois, and Lucy was having a completely non-romantic business meeting with Vasquez in one of the nicest restaurants in the city. 

 

Maggie’s daughter was playing with her Nintendo 3DS in front of the couch, Maggie’s hand slowly sifting through her hair from time to time. 

 

“Ew, I could definitely resist that smell.” Winn scrunched up his face when the smell of sudden feces reached his nose. 

 

“Guess your daughter needs to be changed,” Kara said, handing Lizzy back over to Alex, who rolled her eyes at her girlfriend’s antics. They’d been pretty good about switching up the duties until now. And Kara had only used the Supergirl mission excuse once (so far). 

 

With a snort, Alex picked up her baby and walked her over to the changing table.

 

-

 

“How are you still so terrible at this?”

 

Maggie had snuck up behind her, distracting Alex from her task. 

 

“I’m not terrible at changing diapers,” she defended herself, looking over to see her friend had left her beer bottle on the coffee table and was standing behind her with her arms crossed over her chest. “It just takes me a second.”

 

Humming sarcastically, Maggie bit her bottom lip to keep herself from grinning.

 

“Oh yeah, you have everything under control,” she teased, patting Alex’s shoulder. “Is that why your baby is floating away?” 

 

Whipping her head back around, Alex reached out just in time to catch Lizzy from flying up to the ceiling and leaving her behind on the ground to suffer the consequences. Maggie would have had a field day, and then Alex would have had to ask Kara to fly up to the ceiling again. 

 

Grumbling, Alex let herself get pushed out of the way by Maggie.

 

“Watch how a real professional does it.”

 

Pouting, Alex crossed her own arms and watched as Maggie finished changing the diaper in a few quick movements, all while keeping Lizzy happy and engaged enough that she wouldn’t try to float away again.

 

“I hate you,” Alex whined, accepting her baby as Maggie handed it over.

 

“Nah, you just need some more practice.” Maggie winked, and flinched when Kara suddenly grabbed her arm, looking suspiciously like she’d just seen Rao. She hadn’t exactly super sped over from the couch, but she’d been close.

 

“How did you do that so fast?” She demanded, reaching out and plucking Lizzy out of Alex’s arms to examine Maggie’s perfect handiwork. “Oh my God, I need you to teach me your ways; this is amazing.” She cuddled their child to her chest, her eyes wide with awe.

 

Maggie smirked at Alex, who scoffed.

 

-

 

Standing in front of the full-length mirror, Alex looked down at her flat stomach.

 

With one hand holding up her black polo shirt, Alex traced each stretch mark with her other pointer finger. After the last few months, it was weird to see herself no longer pregnant, no longer with the belly. No bump.

 

It had taken so long to get used to, that she wasn’t sure how she felt now that her child was no longer a part of her. 

 

When arms slipped around her body, Alex dropped her shirt and closed her eyes.

 

“She’s finally asleep,” Kara whispered, nuzzling her nose into Alex’s neck and breathing in her scent. Her arms were strong and steady, and they held Alex together as she struggled to make sense of her new identity as a mother. “I tried some of the Kryptonian lullabies my parents used to sing to me, but she didn’t fall asleep until I started singing ‘You Shook Me All Night Long’ by AC/DC. I wonder why that is.”

 

Grinning, Alex placed her own hands on Kara’s arms to hold them even closer together.

 

“I guess our daughter just has a natural feel for great music,” Alex mused, turning her head to the side to catch Kara’s mouth in a gentle kiss. “Must be the human half. Maybe if Kryptonians were more into rock music…” 

 

With a small growl, Kara abandoned Alex’s lips in favor of biting playfully at her throat and digging her nails into Alex’s sides, making her squirm and laugh. 

 

“Goddamn,” Alex wheezed when Kara finally let up her tickling, “I love you.”

 

Kara’s arms tightened around her in a way they wouldn’t have done before the pregnancy. Held her close in the knowledge that they were bound together, that they loved each other in an altogether different way now. 

 

Not more, just different.

 

“ _ I love you, too _ ,” Kara whispered back in Kryptonese, her forehead pressed against the back of Alex’s neck. “ _ Forever _ .”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I asked RaneJizzoli for a really big and important word and she gave me FECUNDITY. so of course i had to write an accidental pregnancy fic! bless these dorks. Also, this concludes the advent calendar! I hope you all enjoyed. I cannot tell you how grateful I am for all of your lovely comments and kudos and just!!!! i felt very loved all month, so thank you for that! i wish you all happy holidays ♥
> 
> thanks to beaglesinbowties for betaing!
> 
> find me @goshdarnitjay on tumblr xoxo

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [I know my sister like I know my own mind](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8808712) by [Worldclassbeauty](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Worldclassbeauty/pseuds/Worldclassbeauty)
  * [Fake It 'Til You Make It](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11782623) by [dare121](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dare121/pseuds/dare121)




End file.
